Dave & Chuck the Freak ask listeners to call in with their best story possible and give them only 30 seconds to deliver it or be let go.
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00:00so um we give you 30 seconds you got to tell us your best story you can think of and you got to
00:14get it all in in 30 seconds or less you're beating around the bush or it's not working out you're
00:18gone yes it's gonna be i have my timer my stopwatch in front of me and then when you hear this
00:30that's it well you won't even hear it because i'll have already hung up on you that's right
00:33jeff good morning how are you doing okay thanks you think you can do this jeff
00:38oh sure can consider yourself a good storyteller uh i am joe all right okay all right so your 30
00:46seconds jeff begins now i was pumping in septic tanks about 30 years ago we'd taken a very
00:54bullet out and i turned around to grab the hose and my partner was pulling the lid off and i turned
00:59back around and he's gone and i'm looking for him calling for him all of a sudden i see a hand
01:05there's a right hand come through the 10 inch to crust you want to talk about a stinky ride home
01:10i mean he fell in the second he fell into it he fell in the tank he's lucky he found the lid to come
01:16back out oh my god i had to ride with him oh my god i wish i knew more what happened i wonder if he
01:24retired i wonder what happened to him like what was his future like yeah i don't know it changes
01:29you right yeah did he switch professions or did he stay in i think if i fall in that i don't even
01:34put my hands up i just let it end that's where you die yeah there was a lot of do you say crust
01:40crust yeah there's a 10 inches of crust yeah just a hand coming out of it like a zombie yeah because
01:46do you think it's more like a swimming pool or like quicksand um i've never thought of it that
01:51because you're like you're like gonna try to tread feces and urine and whatever else like
01:56would the would it separate would it separate down liquid goes up and then there's like uh
02:03it's like clay like a salad dressing container but wasting gear jake jake are you up for this challenge
02:13i'm up all right jake all right your 30 seconds begins now okay i was a little kid at sea world my
02:22parents took me there i was climbing up the place structure and then this big girl fell down took me
02:29down with her and broke my leg no jake how big in comparison to you well i was only about five years
02:39old or so and she was maybe 10 or 11 but everyone would ask me yeah everyone would ask me how'd you
02:47break your leg little guy and i'd say a fat oh yeah you ran out of time there but but we got the gist
02:54we did get the gist we got the gist you gotta you always gotta look when you're on any type of ladder
03:03system yeah you know when you're a child you're on the little the net right whatever it is you gotta
03:08look up look up look out below oh timber oh i'm fine i've literally felt your leg turn into dust
03:18oh that poor guy under the weight of that really sorry about snapping your whole limb
03:24pulverized it yes hi anonymous how are you guys good how are you we're doing okay thanks uh you
03:34figure this out yes okay 30 seconds on the clock it begins now i'm a fat guy i weigh over 300 pounds
03:4310 years ago i had a midlife crisis so i decided to buy a cross rocket the fastest out of market
03:48on the first ride out straight of a dealership i got in a high speed pursuit with state police
03:52and once i lost them i had to throw the bike away in a body of water i'm not going to disclose where
03:57oh my god now that's a story your bike is in the bottom of a body of water yes i can't tell you
04:06where it is but it is in a body of water i had the evidence my wife doesn't know where the 14th
04:10oh no oh so the police were like we got a fat guy on a crotch rocket here he's about 300 bills
04:19going about 200 mile an hour yeah he just bailed he just bailed he got away that's a story he got
04:26away now that is a story that is a story his wife doesn't even know yeah where the 14 000 went
04:33josh josh after that cliffhanger you think you can do this i think i can do it all right you got
04:4130 seconds on the clock or you're cut off your 30 seconds begins now go all right all right i went
04:47to a crackle barrel on acid man i took four hits of acid man and my mom was like hey you ready to
04:53go crackle barrel i'm like what we're going to crackle barrel i ain't going outside no i don't want
04:57to do that i want to just watch spongebob right so i'm sitting there about a half hour goes by and
05:01she's like all right you're ready and i completely forgot she asked i'm like yeah i'm ready so i get
05:05up and i'm like where are we going i get the crackle barrel um i'm like oh my god i started
05:09tripping out and you know i'm like oh man everything's all moving on all the lights and
05:13i get in there man and i was staring like
05:15you'll never know what happened at the crackle barrel
05:21what happened at the crackle barrel
05:27oh boy huh yes kicked in mama's ready to go to crackle barrel
05:44crackle barrel
05:51crackle barrel
05:54crackle barrel
05:58crackle barrel
06:00crackle barrel barrel
06:02crackle barrel barrel
06:04crackle barrel barrel
06:06crackle barrel barrel