Dave & Chuck the Freak talk to listeners about the times they encountered unexpected ass and bits.
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00:00the question right now for you here on dave and chuck the freak is when did you encounter
00:09unexpected ass and really it's unexpected ass bits whatever and ladies ladies we want to hear
00:15from you too when did you encounter unexpected ass or bits yeah i have two of these stories
00:20i have one good and i have one bad the the bad one you guys have heard it's when i i was living
00:28uh alone and my car was like in a garage that was like behind my house and next to me was like this
00:34apartment building and i went out to get to my car one day and it was you know we leave early
00:39someone was out there was a bigger lady giving herself a shower with a hose outside cleaning
00:48herself i forget what she was fully nothing she was nude she was nude she was nude in the back of
00:54this area and didn't expect anyone to come outside or be around and she was i mean like
01:00roly-poly like it was it was a bad it was a bad scene it was a bad scene yeah and all soaped up
01:06and direct eye contact made and i was like oh boy and i just like went in the garage got my car and
01:13left but like the surprising ass that i think was good is when um for the radio station they decided
01:21they had to send someone to go to ibiza spain and so somehow i got picked and so i end up going to
01:29ibiza spain i get off uh the plane in the airport in spain and uh this model it clearly she had to be
01:37a model she was like six feet tall um you know very pretty uh is walking through the you know the
01:46airport her skirt was only a half of a skirt it had fabric that went down to like
01:56midway of her bum and then everything underneath was like a loose like a crochet but real loose like
02:07just see-through was just like didn't even exist and it went down past her bum to like the top of
02:14her legs but we were all of us guys were like what is this how can you even have this outfit on it
02:20made the outfit made no sense i was like it's literally just your butts hanging out and your front
02:24what's that sound oh it's guys booking trips to spain right now yeah it was crazy no it was crazy it
02:30was crazy like an on but unexpected ass yeah sure completely like had no idea anyone would wear
02:39lisa gave some people unexpected ass remember when her skirt oh yeah that's true yeah yeah
02:44that's true that's that guy's story imagine how many people he's told he's probably not with us
02:51anymore but well then at least he died with a great story one time yeah absolutely i was just
02:57returning bottles her skirt flew right off holy cow it was amazing lisa is some old man's unexpected
03:06ass um let's go next on a regular line to geneva from redford hi geneva hi how's she going hey how's
03:13she going hey when did you see some unexpected ass geneva um well i was out with co-workers at a
03:20bowling alley and one of our co-workers jason was so drunk and he was also wearing tight pants so it
03:27ripped from the back all the way to the front and apparently he didn't like to wear underwear
03:32you could not only see his ass but you could also see his bits but he was also so drunk that it was
03:39hard to explain to him what was going on he didn't understand that everything was hanging out so for
03:45like 10 minutes he was just oh my god he had his joke out for 10 minutes in a bowling alley
03:50yeah yeah it was a pretty embarrassing work day for him oh my god okay uh one should he have been
03:58embarrassed oh yeah yeah i mean everything no no no no i mean by the size yes it was not it was an
04:07impressive it was not impressive that's the worst and two as he recovered i mean was the next day at
04:14work okay what happened oh well he was this was probably about five years ago but yeah the next i
04:20would say week he kind of uh was in a shell and didn't really talk to anyone of course i mean poor guy
04:27that's how you get out to jason yeah that's how you get a nickname and uh this one uh something
04:33that will haunt me forever we had family come over i went to the bathroom and i saw my aunt's
04:38bare ass while she was picking something up off the floor she had not yet wiped oh god damn it
04:47oh unexpected poop ass it was like a really nice story and then there's a horrible oh yeah that's
04:54the worst thing that you could see oh my that's the worst thing you could see who gets up mid poop
04:58to pick something up before you clean i maybe she dropped the toilet paper that's what i was thinking
05:04too just getting ready to wipe you don't i mean i just go for another one i just go i just go for
05:10another most sensible people would but your thrifty aunt might want to use the toilet paper that fell
05:15on the floor i get it that poor poor bastard yeah that's an awful sight uh this one saw old man balls
05:21faffy unexpected saw old man balls unexpectedly on a cruise he was just sleeping in the sun with his
05:29legs wide open and his balls were hanging out the worst image ever he was probably in his 80s
05:33as a cruise worker do you have to go up and say sir sir wake up your balls are hanging out
05:39oh no what a weird job that would be that is an old guy like ball patrol excuse me sir yes sir
05:45yes please wake up what um your testicles are hanging out of your shorts
05:49oh boy everyone walking by has commented it looks like they're stuck it looks like they got some sun on
05:56no they're stuck in the chair oh i'll help you they've wiggled through the slats oh my god these are
06:01some long help help you have a long of course they're long long tangly sacks help me untangle me
06:08sir i don't know how these even popped out all right are you ready on the count of three you you
06:13pull i'll push all right all right one two two three oh they hit me in the face they hit me in the
06:21face thank you boy oh god right in the eye i can see the swelling right in the eye you got i can see my
06:27balls in the face that's velocity on those nuts
06:30you