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#sketch #thesketchreal
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Category
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FunTranscript
00:00So, this should go good.
00:02And the winner is...
00:04If you wanna smoke, then say that.
00:06Just give me the tab, I'll pay that.
00:08I just cashed out, could've got a Maybach.
00:10I ain't like them guys, I'm laid back.
00:12Alright guys, I hope you'll like the last vlog.
00:14We are going to London.
00:16This vlog is going to be everything.
00:18We're playing the charity match, Cyber Charity Match.
00:20We're going to be goalie.
00:22We're doing impulsive with my friend Mike Malak,
00:24Logan Paul, EZ.
00:26How do you actually cough slowly?
00:28Normally, I breathe normal.
00:30If you go too hard, you're going too slow.
00:32Yeah, buddy.
00:34Bro, I'll stop everything, bro.
00:36Don't judge me.
00:38Don't judge me.
00:40I've seen your Twitter, buddy. I've seen your TikTok.
00:42You're not even that good.
00:44How's it going, brother?
00:46Are you happy?
00:48Are you ready for tomorrow?
00:50Yeah.
00:52I'm your goalie.
00:54I'm your goalie.
00:56I'm your goalie.
00:58Alright, bro.
01:02How long are you going to be here for?
01:04I'm just trying to drink Gamble.
01:06Bro, I was going yesterday.
01:08I was going to Gamble yesterday.
01:10I heard.
01:12Alright.
01:16Maybe I have to throw a little Gamble in the game too.
01:18How are you doing?
01:20Good to see you.
01:22Good to see you too, bro.
01:24Really?
01:26I've been on the pitch a couple of times.
01:28A couple of times?
01:30Yeah.
01:32Good luck.
01:34How are you feeling?
01:36I'm just going to do what I do, man.
01:38Do what you do?
01:40Yeah.
01:42Do you think you'll be able to stop a few goals?
01:44I think 12-3 us.
01:46What?
01:4812-3 us.
01:50What?
01:52So you're landing three goals?
01:54Yeah, I practiced with the pros over in America.
01:56You practiced to let three goals in?
01:58That's what I'm planning on.
02:00You know what?
02:02Sure.
02:04Good luck, bro.
02:06Good luck to you too.
02:08You're actually probably going to need it.
02:10I'm serious.
02:12I'm as fit as I've been in the last few years.
02:14Wow.
02:16I can't wait to see you.
02:18Good luck.
02:20You ready?
02:22I think so.
02:24But you're on the opposite team, so...
02:26I think it'll be easy.
02:28You can't cuss here.
02:30F*** around and find out.
02:32Alright?
02:34Yeah.
02:36Dude, this shirt I got off of H.
02:38This one?
02:40Hell yeah.
02:42It shows your curves in a good way.
02:44I know, I feel like I've got the skins on or something.
02:46I got this from...
02:48Nah, man.
02:50I'm going to talk about...
02:52Dude, chicks love it.
02:54This is...
02:56This is the best thing ever.
02:58I'm telling you.
03:00Gaming headphones like this.
03:02Genius idea.
03:04You know how many kids you've got?
03:06Four or five.
03:08Four or five?
03:10Hundreds? Thousands? Billions?
03:12How long can I sit here and do this for?
03:14Nah, like...
03:16I got a second pair of headphones too.
03:18If you want them.
03:22Bro.
03:24It's a good way.
03:26Oh, it's so fun!
03:28Bro, it is sick.
03:30It is sick.
03:32When you're in the club too,
03:34it kind of muffles it a little bit.
03:36It's almost like beats headphones.
03:38If I was a girl, bro...
03:42I'd do nasty.
03:44Nah, I'm in there, bro.
03:46That's just me being honest.
03:48That's full transparency.
03:50I'm going to be honest.
03:52I love the transparency.
03:54Why do I have to take up one of their offers?
03:56WWW.
03:58Get, get, get.
04:00Alright, alright, alright.
04:04Depends. Is it real?
04:06It is real.
04:08Yeah, you're good.
04:10Hey.
04:12You're sick.
04:14What did you tell Paul?
04:16That's what I'm going to do.
04:18They have this interior.
04:20I know, bro.
04:22This is the one you're going to spam for the next...
04:24I got a bad haircut right now.
04:26I lost my lion hat.
04:28Good to see you, bro.
04:30Yeah, dude, I got it here.
04:32Like I got it here.
04:34Walking around the London Eye.
04:36That's incredible.
04:38That's really good.
04:40That's where you come to start talking about it.
04:42Are you playing FIFA?
04:44Yeah, I am.
04:46I practiced a lot, too.
04:48I played like three times.
04:50In the past month.
04:52That counts.
04:54Last time I played goalie,
04:56it was in a different match.
04:58I didn't practice.
05:02Did you grow up playing soccer?
05:04No. I did football.
05:06And we're on opposite teams.
05:08Okay, good.
05:14Walk up to the...
05:20Okay, whenever you're ready.
05:22Go for it.
05:24To the mark.
05:30And then, arms crossed, holding a pose.
05:34Nice.
05:3610...
05:389...
05:408...
05:427...
05:446...
05:465...
05:484...
05:503...
05:52Arms down.
05:54There we go.
05:56That's great.
06:02Great.
06:04$50.
06:08And then let's get a number one.
06:12I love it.
06:14How many does he have to go through?
06:1636.
06:18Nice.
06:22Yes, sir?
06:24Okay, I will.
06:28Is there not a backup goalie?
06:30Oh, you're the guy, bro.
06:32That's good.
06:40Is that a boom mic?
06:42Oh, let's go.
06:46Oh, sweet. Let's go.
06:48Doing good, how are you?
06:50Doing good, how are you?
06:52So, basically, we're going to do...
06:54All you have to do is go up, stand in front of the camera,
06:56Oh, I know exactly what this is.
06:58I've seen this on TV before.
07:00This jacket's sick.
07:02Yeah, where'd you get that from?
07:04Oh, what?
07:06Yeah, that's sick.
07:08Do I walk up for Black Raider here?
07:10Yeah, and then off to the left afterwards.
07:12So you can come that way.
07:14Left and right.
07:16Let's do this.
07:24Let's go again and start a bit more in the middle.
07:26Oh, yeah.
07:28More like right there.
07:40That's a cool signature.
07:42I need to work on a cursive one.
07:44I was actually in the States
07:46because I'm from the U.S.
07:48I'm assuming y'all are from London, right?
07:50Close enough, yeah.
07:52They stopped teaching cursive
07:54halfway through when I was growing up,
07:56so I barely know cursive.
07:58Harvard School for us was like, you get taught exactly how to do cursive.
08:00Really?
08:02And you get taught like normal.
08:04Yeah, I think it's way better.
08:06No, it's like a full-on thing. You get taught exactly how to do it.
08:08And you get taught how to sing in a choir.
08:10Oh, really?
08:12It's like whenever you go to a football game, the chants are really strong.
08:14Everyone knows how to sing in a choir.
08:16That's actually kind of cool. I did not know that.
08:18Speaking from Boston Bay,
08:20so the shots from me out there,
08:22I would say these two lines
08:24are your goalposts.
08:26Okay.
08:28The further forward you come here,
08:30if you can dive out past those lines,
08:32you're both your goalposts.
08:34You shrink the goal?
08:36Yeah, 100%.
08:38We're diving.
08:40So this is what you see.
08:42This is what they see.
08:44Does that make sense?
08:46What do they see that we don't see?
08:48Actually, you know what?
08:50Can you do it to them?
08:52If I come here,
08:54save a shot, you can easily just pass it in there.
08:58If I come here,
09:00you can't see the goal.
09:02You're just going to hit me.
09:04So this is it.
09:06This is where we want to be.
09:12When do we know
09:14to press them?
09:16Like I said,
09:18if it's a small line,
09:20you always want to be in the middle of the goal.
09:22If they take a heavy touch
09:24and it comes in,
09:26if they're still in control,
09:28we'll just come a little bit
09:30and we'll block this angle.
09:32If they take a touch and you think
09:34that's 50-50, I can get there,
09:36then you come.
09:38As long as they're in control...
09:40No.
09:48Receive the ball,
09:50take a touch out,
09:52shoot the ball.
09:58Once we score a goal, we keep streaking.
10:00And for the people who mess up the streak,
10:0220 push-ups.
10:14Come on, Theo!
10:16Come on, Theo!
10:18Set the pace!
10:20Set the pace!
10:22Set the pace!
10:24It's 20 if you miss.
10:2620 if you miss.
10:30We're here at 2.30.
10:46Come on!
10:58One more touch, one more touch.
11:00Take it, take it!
11:06The streak is going!
11:08What's he doing?!
11:16Alright, last one, last one, last one.
11:23Take a shot.
11:24Come on, who didn't go?
11:25Who didn't go?
11:26Who didn't go?
11:27Go, go, go, let's go.
11:28You have 20 few minutes.
11:29One more, one more.
11:30I need 20 from you.
11:31I need 20.
11:32Thank you, thank you.
11:33I don't want to see no bullshit.
11:34Take a touch.
11:35Right foot or left foot?
11:36Right foot, right foot.
11:37I'm on this.
11:38I'm on this.
11:39I'm on this.
11:40I'm on this.
11:41I'm on this.
11:42I'm on this.
11:44Right foot or left foot?
11:45Right foot, right foot.
11:46I'm on this.
11:47Okay.
11:48Take a touch.
11:49Go back.
11:50Give me a shot.
11:51Go, go, go.
11:52Yeah, Sketch!
11:53Yeah!
11:54Who didn't go?
11:55Who didn't go?
11:56I ain't going.
11:57I ain't going.
11:58I ain't going.
11:59I didn't expect Sketch to run up.
12:00I didn't expect Sketch to run up.
12:01We're done.
12:02Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah.
12:03Come on bro.
12:04Good job.
12:05Come on, come on, come on.
12:06He better be into the cinema now.
12:07Yeah, of course.
12:08Yeah.
12:09Yeah.
12:10Yeah, yeah, yeah.
12:11Yeah, yeah, yeah.
12:12Come on!
12:13I need 20 push-ups here.
12:14Hey dad, I need 20.
12:15Messed up is 3.
12:16Good effort.
12:17Right there, what did you mean?!
12:18Messed up is 3.
12:19Dad, 20 push-ups.
12:20Come on.
12:21You messed up is 3.
12:22Come on, take the sticks, bro.
12:23Come on, dad.
12:24Nice touch.
12:25Come on.
12:26Come on.
12:27Come on.
12:28Come on.
12:29Come on.
12:30Come on.
12:31Come on.
12:32Come on.
12:33Come on.
12:34Come on.
12:35Come on.
12:36Come on.
12:37Come on.
12:38Come on.
12:39Come on.
12:40Come on.
12:41Nice touch, nice touch.
12:43Big, big, big.
12:45I need 2 in the cap.
12:46I need 2 in the cap.
12:52That's a good save.
13:03You got to send.
13:11Come on, come on.
13:14Come on, Feno.
13:16No.
13:17Far push up, far push up, Feno.
13:19Far play.
13:21Holy shit.
13:22Dude, that's a lot of running.
13:24That's a lot of fitness.
13:25Nice.
13:26Goalkeeper's not, for me, I think it's the hardest position.
13:28Hardest position, man.
13:29You think so?
13:30Yeah, because now you have to pass as well.
13:32Before, when it was old football, just kick the ball and that's it and do the saves.
13:36But you're doing well.
13:37I'm trying my best.
13:38I see you, man.
13:39That shot there.
13:40Tipped over the bar.
13:41I was trying to press him.
14:02If you're going to run, you have to do this.
14:04You have to kick the ball.
14:05Where you dive, right?
14:06Or you can dive, but I'm saying try to get the ball.
14:09You've just been in goal.
14:10Why are you sweating so hard?
14:12It is a lot to do.
14:13That was like 60 shots in a row.
14:15Most important position on the pitch.
14:16And what about the goalkeeper?
14:17I will.
14:19Being a goalkeeper is the hardest position on the pitch.
14:21Remember what happened to me?
14:22You stole my whole f***ing phone.
14:23But when it comes to my goalkeeper, it's someone who I actually know.
14:25That's true.
14:26That's my assistant manager by the way.
14:27I gave him the same amount of goals as the other keeper.
14:31I don't think I've ever seen a goalie sweat this much.
14:33Bro.
14:34Yeah, put me in the goal.
14:35First job, deal.
14:36No running.
14:37How are you?
14:38How are you with stopping balls?
14:39Bro, when I was in sixth grade, I played volleyball.
14:41Did you?
14:42Yeah, I did.
14:43Ten years ago.
14:44We should try that.
14:45What do you mean?
14:46Potential.
14:47Did you get those goals on camera?
14:49Some of them.
14:50I think I was stood behind people most of the time.
14:53Bro.
14:54We can speak to the editors.
14:55They've said they won't cut it out.
14:57They're going to fry me?
14:59Bro.
15:00Oh my god.
15:01You did well in there, man.
15:02You had so many shots.
15:03I was about to faint for a second.
15:04I'm not going to lie.
15:05Can I borrow your gloves?
15:06Yes, sir.
15:07Hey!
15:08Oh!
15:09Coach.
15:10Mike.
15:11Mike has something to do.
15:12No, no, no.
15:13No.
15:14I'm wearing my game cleats.
15:15You're great.
15:16You're great.
15:17Yeah?
15:18It's going to be hop and hop.
15:19I didn't drink.
15:20I want to drink.
15:21Water and all that stuff before practice.
15:22Oh, shit.
15:23Do you need that much?
15:24What do you mean, am I?
15:25You're about to take a penalty.
15:26Oh.
15:27Yes.
15:28That's a good pen.
15:29Yes.
15:30You're doing the right thing.
15:31You're not going to save them all.
15:32You're going to save that.
15:33Come on, Ty.
15:34Pick a side, Ty.
15:35Pick a side.
15:36I'm going to lick it again.
15:37What side do you like, Ty?
15:38What do you mean?
15:39No, no, no.
15:40I'm just kidding.
15:41That's it.
15:42Yes, Ty.
15:43Good save.
15:44Good save.
15:45Good goal.
15:46Good save.
15:47Good save.
15:48Good save.
15:49Good save.
15:50Good save.
15:51Good save.
16:22Last one running wins.
16:23Wait, hold on.
16:24This is still the test?
16:25No, this is for real.
16:26Don't take the down.
16:27Go to your right a little bit.
16:28You told me to squeeze in?
16:29You told me to squeeze in, Ty.
16:30Hey, crank up the speed.
16:31Okay.
16:32How are you guys feeling?
16:33No.
16:34A little faster.
16:35No.
16:36No.
16:37No.
16:38No.
16:39No.
16:40No.
16:41No.
16:42No.
16:43No.
16:44No.
16:45No.
16:46No.
16:47No.
16:48No.
16:49No.
16:50No.
16:51Oh
17:21Oh
17:37Hey guys, listen, I'll tell you two things I love
17:44Peacefuls
17:47And
17:49Milk chocolate. Hey
17:52Let me tell you a fun joke. Why why are we're where are we going?
17:59Thousand okay. All right. Okay. No
18:03Listen, listen everyone. Mr. Mr. Peace is one of my best friends. Oh, I love them
18:11Really?
18:12Now we're best friends now that you can find me on your box. Thank you for that. Be on your bus
18:17Wow, look at Paul's here and he will get shirtless for
18:23$50 or for WWE
18:30Sketch I need you to promote peaceful. That's what we're here for going back here peaceful chocolate or peaceful chocolate
18:39You see
18:40Hey, let me see that. Look at it. Can you see what's in my hand?
18:45This is the best thing I've ever seen and it's the best tasting thing I've ever seen
18:51Yeah, and Mike you so good at this job, I think I might have to pick this job
18:58Listen I
18:59Don't I don't I don't know. I've never had this amount of freedom in my life
19:03But this is pretty awesome. And this is why I love people
19:08Peaceful deep the peaceful means freedom
19:16I agree. Yes. What do you think of these tools? I love these tools
19:27Chocolate I love peaceful chocolate and I love London so much. I
19:32Love London so much fine if I could be from anywhere
19:35Besides where I'm from it would be London
19:55On on the outside of the booth
19:58Oh
20:03He's done it again
20:07Through ball, it might not be a goal, but it could be this Oh sketch again. Can you make it three?
20:16What a safe sketch saves a penalty from Simon there's no way this is the banker
20:22It's just which corner he's putting in sticky on target. It goes in
20:26I'm
20:31What just happened what I say
20:42And the YouTube all-stars can't believe it
20:46What a moment for sketch
20:49What a save that is it's actually sensational from the lag
20:56That's the NFL experience coming through there and then you've got the whole world watching my son
21:02You've got to score or your team lose. I mean
21:06If he doesn't score contractually, we're not allowed to speak about his missus. So sketch has got different ideas though. It's JJ vs. Sketch
21:15JJ has to score the sidemen lose
21:19Not like this run up we didn't need the hot like this come on JJ put it away
21:25now
21:27Well done
21:29XQC this is your moment to get everything. I don't have any goals. You can see it across the last two games
21:34I think it's about 15 or but forget about that
21:37Save this one
21:39Speed to win it for YouTube all-stars. They can put it either side stand down the middle XQC
21:45We the biggest sue you've ever heard of this goes in
21:49Here we go
21:56And the YouTube all-stars are your sidemen charity match 2025
22:03Champions and they did it on a big occasion. We have a some start in the middle here, sir
22:09What an amazing save. Yes, sir in the penalty shootout. Yeah, it's this man here
22:13I'm sorry, bro
22:14And it wasn't just for saving a penalty shootout, but I'm gonna let you know that you've been awarded player of the map
22:20Dude, no way
22:22No way, are you kidding me? Let's go. Thank you, bro. Let's go
22:29It's very heavy
22:32How high up does this rank for your achievements is odd biased the highest I
22:38Probably not definitely the highest this was insane sketch. It's been a pleasure. Thank you, bro
22:52Oh
23:22Oh
23:36So, please get together this week. Yes, we are. I've got an idea. Okay, I
23:53Like
24:07You surprised me
24:12Nice 20
24:17You know, it's playing better
24:22Yes, sir
24:24Oh, brother man, let's go.
24:26I'm so proud of you.
24:28Thank you, sir.
24:29Great fucking game.
24:30I, I, I cannot believe how good you played.
24:35Did you?
24:35I was going out there and I didn't even have my weapon.
24:38No, you didn't get my weapon on that.
24:40You were so fast.
24:41Yeah, you were moving like you was playing.
24:42I was like, bro, you moved like,
24:44I was like, trying to like, hit the ball.
24:46And you do this move like, it's dive, dive.
24:50And I do it.
24:51The reason you were so good,
24:52because you were playing ahead of the line.
24:54Yeah, well, I don't want to talk about the ball.
24:56They were changing.
24:58Dude, I couldn't see.
24:59I was literally looking at the score.
25:01Where's, where's Jason?
25:02He put a goal in there.
25:03Yeah, it was like a full leap.
25:05I could have scored.
25:06You did a good job.
25:06I'm not gonna actually say anything.
25:07I know you said he was tired.
25:09Yeah, but I thought he wasn't gonna come back in after that.
25:13He loves goals.
25:14So much fun.
25:14I promise you, he loves goals.
25:18You see how he didn't want to spot you?
25:20Yeah.
25:21Bro, he loves goals.
25:23He's gonna be a lady in a minute.
25:28Oh, I love that name.
25:29It's cool.
25:30Money, money, money.
25:31What about that voice?
25:32I don't know.
25:32I've asked him three times.
25:33We said, oh, we're going at this time.
25:34And now it's past that time.
25:35What time is this?
25:36I don't know.
25:37He's going to...
25:37What time are you saying?
25:38Oh, let's go.
25:40That's cool.
25:41For a few reasons.
25:42Pleasure to meet you all.
25:42Yes, sir.
25:43You know what?
25:44Yeah, I like it.
25:45Do I have to be tired?
25:46Yeah.
25:47You can't die.
25:47That was fun.
25:48Time to get high?
25:49Yeah.
25:50Bro, that was really good.
25:51You were sober the whole day?
25:53No, I was going to smoke before,
25:54but I guess it took too long.
25:56What did you do?
25:57Because Phantom's team was like,
25:58he must be sober.
25:59Aren't you bawling out though?
26:00Yeah, no, they surprised me.
26:02Speed had like two or three goals.
26:04He had two goals.
26:04Well, we had, we flipped on him.
26:06But...
26:08I live in America.
26:09They're mostly UK people on the other team.
26:11So I thought they were going to beat you.
26:13But the reason y'all won though,
26:15is because of you.
26:15Because like,
26:16KS, I think they had a better skill team,
26:18but you guys played better as a team.
26:20And you were the better goalie.
26:21Yeah.
26:22Defense, defense wise,
26:23you were the better,
26:24you guys were better,
26:25but they had more skill.
26:31Rate it, rate it.
26:32Oh yeah, ask your person.
26:33I love you and I love this burger.
26:39True love.
26:40True love, Mikey.
26:41Thank you for your meat, bro.
26:42This was great.
26:45You saying that,
26:46gives a whole new context to you.