King Of The Hill Season 2 Episode 12 Meet The Manger Babies
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00:00Ah, just
00:29my luck. The Super Bowl
00:31party's in ten days, and
00:33my television goes on the
00:35disabled list.
00:37Why don't we just get a new TV?
00:40Well, I wish that was
00:41possible, son, but the
00:43terrible truth is that America,
00:46the best country
00:47in the history of the world,
00:50no longer makes television
00:52sets. If I let this
00:54one fall apart, I let
00:55a piece of America die.
00:58Well, couldn't
01:00we just buy, like, a
01:01Japanese one? Bobby,
01:03go to your room.
01:07Luann,
01:08telephone.
01:09It's Buckley.
01:12Hello, Buckley.
01:15What?
01:16Of course
01:18not.
01:19We could go to the outlet stores next
01:21week. It's not like they're
01:23having a sale or anything.
01:25They have everyday low
01:27prices.
01:30Why are
01:31people so mean at Peggy?
01:33It's been 2,000 years
01:35since Jesus was born, but we're still
01:37acting like cavemen.
01:39Oh, honey. Peggy,
01:42we're going shopping for the
01:43Super Bowl party, not your
01:45feminine items.
01:47Diet? Soda?
01:48Hank, we have
01:51got a situation
01:52here. Luann has
01:54come down with a bad
01:55case of the
01:56why-me's.
01:58Come on, just do
01:59something to cheer
02:00up, please.
02:03Hey, uh, Luann,
02:04me and Bobby are
02:05heading over to the
02:06Megalo Mart.
02:08You want to go for a ride?
02:09Is it okay
02:10if I don't feel like
02:12talking?
02:13Sure, why not?
02:14It's not just
02:19Buckley's
02:20everything. The world's
02:21going to pieces. I
02:23mean, look at any
02:24newspaper. Aliens are
02:26getting autopsies and
02:27devil babies are being
02:29born every day.
02:30Well, that may be
02:31true, Luann, but it's
02:33up to each of us to
02:35make the world a
02:36better place. Take
02:37me, for example. I
02:39sell a clean-burning,
02:41energy-efficient
02:42fuel.
02:43Oh, well, do you
02:44think I could sell
02:45propane?
02:47No. What I'm
02:49saying is you've
02:50got to find your
02:51own calling.
02:52Yeah, you're
02:53probably right.
02:55You're always
02:56probably right.
02:58Garage sale!
03:08This is it. One
03:10deflection coil made
03:12in the U.S. of A.
03:13With this in our set,
03:14the only thing beyond
03:15our control is the
03:17size of the NFC
03:18victory.
03:20Why don't we just
03:22watch the game in
03:23Mr. Doetrieve's
03:24house? I like it
03:25there. He keeps
03:27snacks in his couch
03:28cushions.
03:28No, Bobby. The Super
03:31Bowl party goes
03:32Bill, Hank, Dale,
03:35Boomhauer. This is
03:37Hank here, and I want
03:38everything to be
03:39perfect. People are
03:41still talking about
03:42Super Bowl 24.
03:44Boomhauer's dip was
03:45so thick our chips were
03:47snapping like Joe
03:48Theismann's birdie leg.
03:50Oh, my name is
04:01Luan. What's
04:03yours? I'm
04:05Mr. Cat.
04:06Meow, how do you
04:07do?
04:10You're pretty good
04:11with those.
04:13I used to play with
04:14the puppets all the
04:15time with the social
04:16worker.
04:16Hey, how much for
04:19the puppets?
04:20You mean it?
04:22Well, if it costs
04:2325 cents to make
04:25you smile, it's a
04:26bargain.
04:27Look, Dad, an old
04:29wig.
04:31Bobby, take that
04:33off.
04:37I'm not saying it
04:39was a miracle,
04:40Reverend Thomason,
04:41but I don't usually
04:43trip into boxes.
04:45I think God has a
04:46plan for me, and
04:49it involves puppets.
04:52Luan, I like the
04:53idea of a Christian
04:54puppet show, but try
04:56to see things from my
04:58perspective as the
04:59spiritual leader of
05:00this congregation.
05:02We just laid new
05:03carpet in the
05:04activities room.
05:05You put 30 kids in
05:06there and lose their
05:07attention.
05:08Fruit punch all over
05:09my new carpet.
05:10Oh, please just
05:12hear me out.
05:13You know how baby
05:14Jesus was born in a
05:16manger?
05:18Okay.
05:19Baby Jesus was born in a
05:21manger.
05:22Now, what if,
05:25Reverend, what if the
05:27barnyard animals who
05:28witnessed the miracle
05:30birth of the Son of God
05:31had a show of their
05:34own?
05:34Mm-hmm.
05:36But Jesus only spent a few
05:39days in the manger, and
05:41after Luke 2.16, there's
05:43no mention of the
05:44animals.
05:45Are you sure?
05:46Trust me, Luan.
05:48After he leaves the
05:48manger, the Bible pretty
05:50much sticks with Jesus.
05:52Well, ooh, maybe that's
05:54good, because then the
05:56animals are kind of like
05:57us.
05:57They're just waiting for
05:59Jesus to come back.
06:00And in the meantime,
06:01don't you think they'd
06:04have all sorts of crazy
06:05adventures?
06:09I call it the
06:11manger babies.
06:14We're headlining next
06:15week in the activities
06:16room.
06:18Manger babies.
06:19How do you like that?
06:21This is going to be a
06:22great show, Luan.
06:23I know, but now I've
06:24got so much work to do,
06:26I have to write a script,
06:27build a puppet theater,
06:29learn to talk without
06:30moving my lips.
06:31If you want, you can
06:32make a theater out of
06:33that old refrigerator box
06:35in the garage.
06:36I keep it pretty clean.
06:38Oh, Uncle Hank.
06:43Hey, who said that?
06:50You're doing a great
06:52job, Luan.
06:54Yep.
06:55Yep.
06:57Thanks, guys.
06:58But if you have any
07:00suggestions...
07:01Well, you know what I
07:02got you back in that
07:03thing.
07:04I want to spell
07:05theater, R-E.
07:06I'm glad you're that
07:07way.
07:09For those of you who
07:10missed my sermon this
07:12morning, I'd like to
07:14remind you that spilling
07:15anything on a new
07:16carpet is a sin.
07:19Now, please give a warm
07:21welcome to Miss Luan
07:23Flattery.
07:26Once upon a time,
07:29almost two thousands
07:31of years ago,
07:33a Lord and Savior,
07:35Jesus Christ, was born
07:37in a manger.
07:41And in that manger
07:42lived the cutest little
07:43animals.
07:44This is their
07:48story.
07:53After Jesus left,
07:56King Harold came,
07:57demanding firstborn
07:59sons.
08:00He cast an evil spell
08:03on them, freezing
08:04everyone.
08:07You slayed your
08:07eyeballs, and
08:08nativity's seen out of
08:10yard sales, second
08:11hands.
08:12hands, they came
08:14to life, and then
08:15amen, I met the
08:17manger babies.
08:20There's Obadiah the
08:21donkey, he says,
08:23yeah, Jose the cat,
08:25meow, meow, and
08:26octopus too, gurgle,
08:28gurgle.
08:29But let's not forget
08:30the very British bird,
08:32Ceresna Featherbuff
08:34from the third,
08:35chummed, I'm sure
08:36governor.
08:38They are the
08:39manger babies,
08:41getting in trouble,
08:42the manger babies,
08:44spread that message
08:45of love,
08:46manger babies,
08:48manger babies.
08:54Darn it, I left
09:08a finished snail
09:09sticking out a
09:09quarter inch.
09:10Hi, shush.
09:13Today's episode,
09:15going to the
09:16movies.
09:18Who wants to go to
09:19the movies?
09:20Eeyah, I do,
09:23Eeyah.
09:25Uh-oh, there are
09:27five of us and I
09:28only have four
09:29tickets.
09:30One of us blokes
09:32could sneak in,
09:33watch what.
09:34Count me out,
09:36is it sneaking
09:37rub?
09:39Eeyah,
09:40everybody's doing it,
09:42Eeyah.
09:43Careful,
09:44careful.
09:44Me okay?
09:46Let's go.
09:48La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,
09:50we're going to the movies.
09:52La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la.
09:54Yeah, but it reflects poorly
09:56on my craftsmanship.
09:58That's all I'm saying.
09:59Hank,
10:00you're the only one
10:01who notices.
10:03That's real.
10:05La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la.
10:07La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la.
10:11Here you go.
10:13Four tickets.
10:15But there are five of you.
10:16You are trying to sneak
10:18into the movies.
10:20You manger babies
10:21are in a lot of trouble
10:23unlocking you
10:24in a closet.
10:26No!
10:27No!
10:29And that's why
10:31you shouldn't sneak
10:32into the movies.
10:35The end!
10:43Yeah, the end?
10:45Hmm.
10:47But what?
10:48Well, do they get out
10:50of the closet?
10:52Huh?
10:53Sure, I guess.
10:55I don't think it's the end.
10:58How?
11:00How do they get out?
11:03Um...
11:04I'm bored.
11:13I don't understand.
11:14I don't...
11:16I can't...
11:17I don't...
11:17I can't...
11:18I can't...
11:21I can't...
11:23I can't...
11:24I can't...
11:25I can't...
11:26I can't...
11:28I can't...
11:29I can't...
11:29I can't...
11:31I can't...
11:32I can't...
11:33I can't...
11:34I can't...
11:35I can't...
11:36I can't...
11:37I can't...
11:38I can't...
11:39I can't...
11:40I can't...
11:41I can't...
11:42I can't...
11:43I can't...
11:44I can't...
11:45I can't...
11:46I can't...
11:46I can't...
11:47Uh, I'll save you manger babies.
11:52You will?
11:53Yes, because I'm the assistant manager of this movie theater.
12:00I sell popcorn and popcorn accessories, and you are fired.
12:07We're free! We're free!
12:09Thank you, assistant manager.
12:15Meow, can we ever repay you?
12:19By never forgetting this lesson, sneaking into the movies is wrong.
12:25As wrong as spilling juice on a new carpet.
12:30Bravo! Bravo!
12:32You know, Lou Anne really shouldn't waste this kind of talent on church.
12:36If you want, I could show her tape to my boss at Channel 84.
12:40He's always looking for quality children's programming and home videos of things blowing up.
12:46Well, Lou Anne really could use a boost right now.
12:50But I could not take advantage of our friendship like that, no.
12:53Oh, Peggy, honey, this is show business.
12:56Forbidness. That's what friends do.
13:06Done. All right, Bobby, it's safe to plug her back in now.
13:13Uh, oh, okay.
13:15Another Super Bowl, another can of Scotchgard.
13:20It would be a whole lot simpler if you would just ask Bill not to wipe his hands on the cushions.
13:27I got a better idea.
13:29You sit here.
13:31Boomhauer, Dale, me, and Bobby will sit here.
13:34We'll do a zone defense around the chips.
13:37But what if Bill tries scrambling around the coffee table?
13:40He doesn't have that kind of quickness, Peggy.
13:43Not anymore.
13:44Uh, Aunt Peggy, could you please pull your car out of the garage?
13:49Me and the babies need to rehearse.
13:51The TV station could call any minute.
13:54They'd be crazy not to.
13:56That was the best dang Christian puppet show I have ever seen.
14:01Ever.
14:02Well, I couldn't have done it without your help, Uncle Hank.
14:06You saved the day.
14:08That's why this time, I wrote a part specially for you.
14:13Well, that's very nice, Luanne, but my appearance was one night only.
14:18But you gotta do it.
14:20Well, who else am I gonna get to play God?
14:24God?
14:26Sure.
14:27You're great as the hero of my last show, so I figured, pfft.
14:31Why not have you play the greatest hero of them all?
14:35Tell you what, Luanne, just as soon as I finish turning beer into water, I'll meet you in the garage.
14:43Great!
14:44She made me God.
14:50Hey, if you're God, I guess that makes me Jesus.
14:54Bobby, honey, you really shouldn't say that.
14:57That is for Luanne to decide.
15:01Let there be light.
15:04And it was good.
15:06Yeah, that's super, Uncle Hank, but can we get back to the script?
15:09We're at the part where you meet your arch-enemy.
15:14Bobby's G.I. Joe?
15:16Joe Sixpack.
15:18He's a drunk driver who died in a car crash and was sent to hell.
15:23And then he borrowed Satan's pickup truck without asking and trashed it, so he got kicked out of hell.
15:28And now he roams the earth riding buses and doing evil like he won't call you on your birthday and he throws beer bottles at your head.
15:35What? He crashed a truck?
15:39You will feel my wrath.
15:42Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
15:51What you throwing out, Grandpa?
15:53The money I poured into the social security system?
15:58It's for Luanne's puppet show.
16:01I'm playing God.
16:02Well, maybe we ought to ask God who's going to win the Super Bowl.
16:07Going to win.
16:08The game was pre-taped six months ago in the same Nevada hangar where they faked the moon landing.
16:15Yeah, man, it's like that dang old Capricorn one, man.
16:18They're a good movie, but, you know, they ain't going to fake no saying on the ground like that.
16:22They don't need Armstrong.
16:25Well, I hope you're ready for that party, Hank, because you only got...
16:29Four more days till the Super Bowl.
16:35Bill, the Super Bowl is in three days.
16:39Oh, damn.
16:47God's not angry on that line.
16:49He's vengeful.
16:50Let's try it again.
16:51Luanne, it's the TV station.
16:58Hello?
16:59Mm-hmm.
17:00Oh, Hank, look how excited she is.
17:03You know, just a few days ago, she was talking like the world was coming to an end.
17:09You're a good man.
17:11Man?
17:12We did it, we did it.
17:15Channel 84 is putting major babies on the air.
17:20It's UHF, Uncle Hank.
17:22Ultra high frequency.
17:25Oh, Luanne, you have thrust your hands into something wonderful this time.
17:30We better get back to work.
17:31We've got a whole hour to fill on Sunday.
17:34Well, that doesn't give us much time to get ready.
17:36I mean, Sunday is...
17:39Sunday?
17:41Now, is that before or after the Super Bowl?
17:44Daring!
17:45Can you believe it?
17:47They put us on against the highest rated television event of the year
17:50because they know we're the one show that can beat it.
17:53Whew.
17:54It's a huge responsibility.
17:57But I know I could do it.
17:59With God on my side.
18:01Mm-hmm.
18:02Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh.
18:06Uncle Hank, I just realized my octopus only has six legs.
18:14Hmm.
18:15Now, if I call him a sextopus, do you think I'll offend sensibilities?
18:20Uh, I'm sure you'll figure it out before Super Sunday.
18:25I call it Super Sunday because that's when they play the Super Bowl.
18:31This Sunday.
18:33Mm-hmm.
18:34I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm going to stay home and watch the game.
18:40What?
18:41But you're in my show.
18:44Luanne, the Super Bowl is an event.
18:47We're having a party.
18:49I'm the host.
18:50So, you mean you're not coming?
18:54Uh, no, that's not what I said exactly.
19:01I said I'm going to watch the game, but it could end early due to injuries or, uh, a terrorist attack.
19:08Yeah, who knows?
19:15So, you think I want to miss the Super Bowl?
19:18No, sir.
19:19I've got enough money on this game to cover the bath I took on the Dinah Shore Classic.
19:23But I will sit through that puppet show because Luanne asked me to.
19:29Uh, come on.
19:30I'll be God some other time, like, uh, Easter.
19:34That's during baseball season.
19:36Who cares?
19:38Hank, Luanne believes in you.
19:40How can you allow suffering in her world when you have the power to prevent it?
19:47Suffering is a part of every religion, Peggy.
19:51I mean, look at what the Jews have been through, and you never hear them complaining.
19:55All of the great...
20:06Okay, who had three minutes and 40 seconds?
20:12Go.
20:14Well, goodbye, Hank.
20:16Enjoy the Selfish Bowl.
20:24Uh, Luanne, I want you to know, if Uncle Hank lets you down, honey, it doesn't mean that the world is a bad place.
20:34Oh, yes, it does.
20:35Hmm.
20:39Check it out.
20:40Look at that plane.
20:41I don't know.
20:45Trade it to the commercial.
20:48What the hell do Tina Turner's legs have to do with auto insurance?
20:55Whoa!
20:56Wait a minute.
20:58This just in from the Super Bowl.
20:59With 48 seconds left in the first quarter, it's 63 degrees and partly cloudy.
21:06Now stay tuned for the premiere of Luanne Platter's Manger Babies.
21:11What are you doing, Hank?
21:12If I wanted to spend Super Bowl Sundays staring at my wife, I would have married Fran Tarkenden.
21:19I didn't do anything.
21:21Okay, Luanne, you're on in five, four, three, two.
21:39Hey, look at that.
21:43He's broken free.
21:44He's gone.
21:46He's gone.
21:48Come on, man.
21:49Turn it back.
21:51I didn't change it.
21:53Oh, damn, we missed it.
21:57Well, at least we get to watch him dance in the end zone.
22:01That's right.
22:02Come on.
22:03Mm-hmm.
22:05Mm-hmm.
22:07Okay, baby.
22:08Oh, come on.
22:08Hey, man, man, what the hell is this?
22:13La, la, la, la.
22:14Come on, manger babies.
22:17Jesus, I'll give you a ride.
22:20We don't need it.
22:22God is the designated driver tonight.
22:25God doesn't care about you.
22:28How can you say that?
22:30God does care, and he will show it.
22:35This is getting old, Hank.
22:38It's not me.
22:39It's this damn remote control.
22:42Bill must have dripped crumbs in it or something.
22:47Maybe God had a flat tire or...
22:54What the hell is going on?
22:57All I know is this is the part of the movie where I start thinking,
23:01why don't they just get out of the house?
23:04Don't be an idiot, Graham.
23:06God's not coming.
23:08He's watching the Super Bowl.
23:11Now get in.
23:13Eeyah!
23:14We better do what he says.
23:17Eeyah!
23:18Well, he is our only ride.
23:24Luanne, no!
23:25Don't get in the car!
23:30Eeyah!
23:31If God doesn't get here soon, we're all going to die!
23:36Maybe it's best that we do die.
23:39Who wants to live in a world without God?
23:43You're right.
23:45Hey, Joe Sixpack, why don't you just point your car at those uncommon headlights and let's get this thing over with.
23:54Oh, my God!
23:59Yes, I have come.
24:04Thank you, Uncle.
24:06Lord, we never stop believing in you.
24:09The Manger Baby's faith has been rewarded.
24:13You are all saved.
24:18And as for you, Joe Sixpack, anyone who drinks and drives is a real jackass.
24:26Eeyah!
24:26Hey!
24:30Oh, oh.
24:31Oh, oh.
24:32Oh, oh.
24:33Oh, oh.
24:41So, Hank, how does it feel doing the right thing?
24:45Pretty good, I guess.
24:46Of course, not as good as getting to watch the end of the Super Bowl.
24:52Ah, the Super Bowl's always a blowout.
24:55This puppet show, it was a real knuckle-biter.
24:58Oh, my Lord!
24:59It's Troy Aikman!
25:01What are you doing here, son?
25:03Uh, sir?
25:04Well, it's kind of a funny story.
25:07Some guys were snapping towels in the locker room,
25:09so I went to Bible study to get some perspective on it.
25:12And I saw a flyer for this puppet show.
25:15Sort of a little miracle.
25:16I guess.
25:17You know, it was kind of a miracle that brought me here, too.
25:22You see, I was watching my TV, and it started flipping channels.
25:27Mom, I hope you don't mind, but I borrowed the batteries from your remote control.
25:32What remote control?
25:33Uh, I don't have a remote control.
25:36Sure you do, in your purse.
25:38The universal remote that can change the channel on any brand of television.
25:43I borrowed the batteries from my Game Boy.
25:45When?
25:46Before the Super Bowl.
25:49But if the remote had no batteries, how did I?
26:00Or after the Super Bowl.
26:03I don't remember.
26:04I don't remember.
26:05I don't remember.
26:06I don't remember.
26:07I don't remember.
26:08I don't remember.
26:09I don't remember.
26:10I don't remember.
26:11I don't remember.
26:12I don't remember.
26:13I don't remember.
26:14I don't remember.
26:15I don't remember.
26:16I don't remember.
26:17I don't remember.
26:18I don't remember.
26:19I don't remember.
26:20I don't remember.
26:21I don't remember.
26:22I don't remember.
26:23I don't remember.
26:24I don't remember.
26:25I don't remember.
26:26I don't remember.
26:27I don't remember.
26:28I don't remember.
26:29I don't remember.
26:30That's right.