Homebound 3.0 - Season 2 Episode 1
#CinemaJourney
#CinemaJourney
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:01This is the story of Boy Meets Girl.
00:08And like every Boy Meets Girl story,
00:10there comes a point where they're not just standing in front of each other
00:13asking to be loved, but also...
00:15Harry! Harry!
00:17We have the good news!
00:19My Boy Meets Girl is so happy!
00:22Hurry up, hurry up, hurry up!
00:24Yes, yes, yes, yes!
00:25I mean, I want you to give up your parents.
00:28It's so perfect!
00:29Maybe it's twins.
00:31But also enlisting each other as willing accomplices
00:34in a victimless crime.
00:36Okay.
00:37Maybe willing and victimless are broadly defined.
00:40Can you show me, boys and boys?
00:44Shoot or not a shot, just stop the feeling
00:48You can see...
00:49Hey!
00:50We're coming!
00:51We're coming to Lisa!
00:54Lucky baby, boo!
00:57Are you ready?
00:58I do not consent to this plan.
01:00Shut up, we'll talk about it later.
01:02No.
01:03It's paternal.
01:05Hi!
01:06Hi!
01:07What's that saying?
01:08Something, something?
01:09Repent later?
01:10Strap-in, Buster.
01:11If you need me now, you'll take away the biggest part of me.
01:13Oh, no, baby, please don't go.
01:34I still don't believe it.
01:36Let's see.
01:37Let's see.
01:38This is a beautiful line.
01:39Ah!
01:40Before we go.
01:41You said this line,
01:42although we can't always be together,
01:44but they will always be together.
01:47Yes!
01:48To make love,
01:49it's a beautiful life.
01:51We're so happy to have our parents.
01:57Do we have to invite them?
01:59Mindy, your sister is pregnant.
02:01Yoel is coming to the show.
02:02We're going to celebrate.
02:03We're going to celebrate.
02:04We're going to celebrate.
02:05Oh, yes.
02:06Your mother said it right.
02:07It's such a important moment.
02:08Yoel must be together with her father.
02:11You're a child.
02:12Oh, okay, fine.
02:13As long as you don't play our wedding song.
02:15Okay, sorry to interrupt,
02:16but can we talk to you both for a second?
02:18In private?
02:19Yeah.
02:20Hong Kong and Geneva White House.
02:25Okay, this has officially gone too far.
02:28We are staging an intervention.
02:29It was my idea.
02:30Oh, well, no I wasn't.
02:32I think I was the one that said
02:33we should do something.
02:34Totally, and then I said,
02:35oh, you mean like an intervention,
02:36and you go, oh gosh, here's Ellie,
02:37that's a great idea, an intervention.
02:38Oh my god, I did.
02:39Anyway, the point is,
02:40we can't let you do this.
02:41Right, Dave?
02:42Right.
02:43Absolutely not.
02:44Wait, weren't you my Uber driver?
02:45Yeah, but that's just my side hustle.
02:47My real calling is I want to start a podcast.
02:49See, I'm thinking an anthropology
02:51into the love lives of the modern
02:53backseat rideshare user.
02:55You two?
02:56Mmm, so good.
02:58Your parents are taking this fake pregnancy
02:59pretty seriously,
03:01and the longer it goes on,
03:02the harder the withdrawal.
03:03Yeah, and judging by how attached they are
03:04to your false positive pee sticks,
03:06you're gonna have to like eternal sunshine
03:07of the spotless mind then.
03:08Guys, can you just like all relax?
03:11It'll be three weeks.
03:13Max.
03:14As soon as I get my inheritance,
03:17I'm just gonna say that the hospital messed up
03:19and made a mistake.
03:20And what?
03:21They're just gonna let you keep the money?
03:22Ah, yeah.
03:23Once I buy a house.
03:24You can't refund that shit.
03:25Great.
03:26They'll just never forgive us.
03:27Ah, why are you taking their side?
03:29Because you said we'd talk about this later.
03:32This is later.
03:34Yeah, it is later,
03:35and you're supposed to be agreeing with me.
03:36That's not how it works.
03:37Yes, it is.
03:38Otherwise, you should have said something earlier.
03:39Consent can be implicit, okay?
03:41I think you mean implied,
03:43which is pretty illicit these days.
03:44And rightfully so.
03:45It is illicit,
03:46and we are all complicit,
03:48therefore we have a moral imperative to see it through.
03:50No, we don't.
03:51And rhyming two words together
03:52doesn't automatically give you a convincing rhetoric to stand on.
03:55Fine then.
03:56Go ahead.
03:57And crush their hopes and dreams, Harry.
04:00Fine.
04:01No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
04:03No!
04:04Look, Melissa's right.
04:06We are all complicit.
04:08See?
04:09Aiden's the one that leaked the bad intel
04:10and I should have stopped him
04:11and Ally should have destroyed those pregnancy tests.
04:12Mm-hmm.
04:13So, we are all at fault.
04:14Ipso facto.
04:15We should be the ones to fix this.
04:16Breach, sister.
04:17I think Dave should do it.
04:18I'll do it for 10 bucks.
04:19Deal.
04:20Sweet as.
04:21Ha!
04:22In your face, Marie.
04:23Wait, what?
04:24No!
04:25Hey, Dave!
04:26Don't you!
04:27Oi!
04:30Hi, Dave the Uber driver here.
04:31Do you guys want to know a secret?
04:32No, stop!
04:33I'll give you 20 bucks if you keep your mouth shut.
04:35Done.
04:36Sorry, no secret.
04:37Never mind.
04:38Jen?
04:39Hm?
04:40What is it talking about?
04:41Shut up, Jen?
04:42Lisa!
04:43We love juicy secrets.
04:47Come on, spill the tea!
04:51Okay.
04:52Yes.
04:53Um...
04:54Well...
04:57Do you remember?
04:58Do you remember when Aiden spilled the beans
04:59about how Henry and Melissa would make such great parents together?
05:02Well...
05:03What he meant to say was...
05:07Ally?
05:08Ally!
05:09What?
05:10Yes.
05:11Thank you, Jen.
05:13What he meant was that he was saying...
05:15We...
05:16What?
05:17Sorry, what?
05:18We want to be godparents.
05:20Oh.
05:22Together!
05:23Together!
05:24Yay!
05:25Yay!
05:26Nice!
05:27Nice!
05:28That is awesome.
05:30Woooo!
05:31Woooo!
05:32Woooo!
05:33Woooo!
05:34Woooo!
05:35Fake godparents glow!
05:36Oh my god, did you guys see the look on Mandy's face?
05:38She cannot believe that my parents would let you idiots be godparents to my fake child.
05:43It's like, the minute that I'm knocked up with a man in my life, I can do no wrong.
05:50Which is total patriarchal bullshit.
05:52Ugh.
05:53I hate it.
05:54Yeah?
05:55Tell that to your face.
05:56Ah, Henry, um...
05:57I'm having a fake child in a world that expects women to have real children.
06:01I think that my feminist credentials are pretty, uh, watertight.
06:04That's feminism, Henry, it's called feminism.
06:07So, you're a feminist because you only pretend to conform to patriarchal expectations?
06:12No, I am subverting it.
06:14For profit.
06:15And that...
06:16Is pretty badass.
06:17Yeah, that is kinda badass.
06:18I'm trying to score us a mortgage-free house in Auckland.
06:21Do you know how hard that is?
06:23It's so hard.
06:24Don't you want to move out?
06:26And live rent-free?
06:27I mean, it's not such a bad idea, Henry.
06:30Yeats, Tess Elliot, Huxley, they all had rich female patrons.
06:33Yeah, sugar mamas are the best.
06:35Sugar mamas are the best!
06:37Yeah, good for you, Henry.
06:38Well done.
06:39Okay, five minutes ago, you lot were all afraid this would result in the diagnosis of a new mental health disorder,
06:45and now you're all on her side?
06:47Yeah, Henry.
06:48I am.
06:49Because that was before your parents looked into my eyes, and they saw my soul.
06:52They were staring into my soul.
06:55It's called surrendering, Henry.
06:57You should, um, try it.
06:59And look, worst case scenario, the two of you could actually get together and have a real baby, right?
07:04What?
07:05No!
07:06I mean, not right now.
07:09Yeah, totally.
07:10Not like, never.
07:13Right?
07:14Look.
07:17Corkies.
07:18Melissa, come!
07:19The grandmother's here.
07:20She wants to see your tongue.
07:22I'm coming!
07:23Crap.
07:24Uh, why does your grandma want to see your tongue?
07:26Just keep quiet and follow my lead.
07:29Come on.
07:30All right, pick me up, Dave.
07:31I need some Elton John.
07:33And then I want a baby.
07:34Tiny, tiny dancer.
07:35Nice.
07:36It's a good one.
07:37It's a high key, but I think I nailed it.
07:38Found a Chinese Elton John.
07:41Hmm.
07:42Hey, yeah.
07:43It's dangerous.
07:45Melissa, you need to properly adjust your life.
07:49Do you know it?
07:50It's lucky that I have Mandy's poor woman.
07:55Last time, I bought her a lot of drugs.
07:59Surely they're expired by now.
08:01You're crazy!
08:02How many drugs will over the past?
08:04It will only be dry.
08:05Hey, it's better for you.
08:07Thanks, Papa, but I think my dampness
08:09is just fine.
08:10Right, Henry?
08:11Melissa, you're right.
08:12You're right.
08:13You're right.
08:14You're right.
08:15You're right.
08:16You're right.
08:17You'll get the blood of your daughter.
08:18And when you're young,
08:20you're a young doctor in their village.
08:23You know how many people find her?
08:25When Mandy's pregnant,
08:26you're all listening to her.
08:27Look, how great the effect is.
08:29Right, Mandy?
08:30Mm-hmm.
08:31I think we're all forgetting that
08:32I'm also a doctor here.
08:33Like an actual doctor doctor.
08:36Yeah, like, um, for the skin.
08:38What's that supposed to mean?
08:40Oh, nothing.
08:41Just that it's skin deep.
08:43As opposed to keto.
08:44Is that your, uh, distinguished domain
08:47of medical expertise?
08:48No, I've actually had a baby.
08:51It's called experience.
08:53Well, I'm about to have one,
08:54so it's not like you own that shit, okay?
08:56It's not like a fake Instagram profile.
08:59I miss Oprah.
09:01I miss Oprah.
09:02Hmm.
09:03I couldn't agree more.
09:04Hmm.
09:05I have an idea.
09:06Why don't we ask the father
09:07You have a baby.
09:09You have a baby.
09:10You have a baby.
09:11Every person has a baby.
09:12Let's celebrate together.
09:13Okay?
09:14I miss Oprah.
09:31I couldn't agree more.
09:33I have an idea.
09:34Why don't we ask the father
09:36to be for his thoughts?
09:38What do you think, Henry?
09:39I don't know.
09:40I'll tell you what he thinks.
09:41He thinks it's a lot of...
09:42I love it.
09:43I think it's just what Melissa needs.
09:46Stop.
09:47Stop.
09:59Babe.
10:00Babe, just listen to me.
10:01No, you listen.
10:02I'm not changing my mind, okay?
10:03So you can stop with this stupid 70s breakup song.
10:05Look.
10:06I'm a changed man.
10:07No more conspiracies.
10:08I swear.
10:09The old we're living in a simulation Vaughan is out.
10:11Really?
10:12Yeah.
10:13Hard out.
10:14Just no one improved living in reality Vaughan now.
10:15Besides, you can't pretend that you don't miss these sea-sore-curring-wise disarming you
10:20under these soft, wispy, wounded brows.
10:23I don't.
10:24I don't miss them.
10:25Are you?
10:26When you kissed Henry, did he look at you like this?
10:30God.
10:31Seriously.
10:32Astragalus root for morning sickness.
10:34Codonoxus clinic for mummy brain.
10:35How did you comb your treats?
10:37Trap for swollen nipples.
10:38I mean, what else do these guys believe in?
10:40Aliens?
10:41You said it'd only be for three weeks, right?
10:43Don't tell me your watertight feminist credentials can't stomach three weeks of soggy, lukewarm
10:48snow fungus for a mortgage-free house.
10:50Are you trying to be smart?
10:52I'm just trying to be an ally.
10:54Oh.
10:55Really?
10:56Yeah.
10:57Fine, then drink this.
11:01What?
11:02Drink this.
11:03You want to be an ally?
11:05Show me.
11:06I don't think that's necessary.
11:08I said drink this.
11:10No.
11:11Drink it.
11:13No.
11:14I said drink it.
11:16No, you drink it.
11:17You want to be an ally?
11:19You should take the bullet.
11:21Argh!
11:22No, it's your bullet.
11:23You take it.
11:24No!
11:25Get off me!
11:26Ah!
11:27Oh!
11:28It's too bad!
11:29Oh!
11:30You can't lie to me, Mandy.
11:31These eyes, they shine for you.
11:33Did you just misquote coldly?
11:35Mandy, I want you back for good.
11:37No.
11:38Too late.
11:39Take that.
11:40I've changed.
11:41I swear.
11:42I even gave away all our shares in the Keto app and started a new AI-powered fat-chicker
11:45called Conspiracy Not Conspiracy.
11:47What?
11:48Yeah, a new app that debunks conspiracies.
11:50It's gonna kill-
11:51No, you idiot.
11:52You sold our Keto app shares?
11:54Nah, I gave them away.
11:56What?
11:57I thought it'd be like a grand gesture to show you how much I've changed.
12:00You stupid.
12:01Those shares are our entire family's net worth.
12:06We're broke now, Vaughn.
12:08Broke!
12:09God!
12:10Oh!
12:14Oh!
12:15What the hell?
12:16Oh!
12:17Disgusting!
12:18So dead!
12:19What the hell is in this?
12:20Definitely foxtail in there somewhere.
12:21I can't believe I forgot how bad these tonics were.
12:24Okay, come on.
12:25We should get back out there.
12:26It is our pregnancy karaoke party.
12:28Seriously, Mel?
12:29You still wanna do this?
12:31I'm just worried that our parents are enjoying this too much and when the bubble bursts it's
12:36gonna ruin everything.
12:37Henry, we've just spent the last two months indulging our parents in our fake relationship.
12:41And look how they turned out.
12:43Pretty good, wouldn't you think?
12:44Yeah, but the stakes were lower.
12:47I've disappointed them with a thousand different relationships.
12:50A thousand.
12:51I'm rounding up.
12:52Look, when we started this thing, we didn't want it to be real so it didn't matter if we
12:56messed up.
12:57But now, it's different.
12:59I just wanna experience the real part of this for a change and I don't wanna risk it for
13:03some money.
13:04Do you?
13:08Do you?
13:09Melissa, tell me you don't wanna risk it for some money and a goddamn house.
13:15Look, I wasted years of my life supporting my deadbeat ex-fiance through medical school
13:20who then cheated on me with my ex-best friend.
13:22Then, I spent the last two years rebuilding myself so I could get out of this dump and
13:26start living again and I would've done that 16 hours ago until you dragged me back in here
13:31to make this real.
13:32So, forgive me if I want a backup plan just in case this doesn't actually work out.
13:37Wow.
13:38Wow.
13:39Wow.
13:40Henry!
13:41Henry!
13:42Henry!
13:43Henry!
13:44Henry!
13:45I don't get it, bud.
13:46She knows the only reason I was so obsessed with this idea of escaping the matrix was because
13:55I thought if kissing your beautiful mother was this hella hot in a simulation then it must
13:59be even more lit outside it.
14:01In reality, which of course I no longer believe in and neither should you because you and me
14:05right now are firmly in reality.
14:07There is no matrix.
14:08You get that right?
14:09Obviously.
14:10See?
14:11I'm completely reformed.
14:12Why can't she see that?
14:13I'm sorry, bud.
14:14I tried my best.
14:15That's okay, man.
14:16It's actually a lie.
14:17Dude, how are you so chill all the time?
14:18I'm a kid.
14:19I just live in the moment.
14:20Wow.
14:21Why did you say it?
14:22I don't know why I said it.
14:23I mean, it could have been worse.
14:24No, it was pretty bad.
14:25Yeah.
14:26Yeah, no, it sounded bad.
14:27I didn't mean it.
14:28It just came out.
14:29I don't...
14:30Maybe this whole thing was a mistake.
14:31No, it's not.
14:32And I know for a fact that Melissa doesn't think that.
14:33She doesn't?
14:34Of course not.
14:35And even if she did, she didn't mean it.
14:36She's just thinking it.
14:37Oh, well, that's reassuring.
14:38Henry.
14:39It's like the moment our parents showed up, maybe she thought crap.
14:41How are you so chill all the time?
14:42How are you so chill all the time?
14:43I'm a kid.
14:44I'm a kid.
14:45I just live in the moment.
14:50I made a mistake and this whole pregnancy thing is her way of making me ended so that
14:54she doesn't have to.
14:55Wow.
14:56Do you think maybe you're overthinking it just a little bit?
14:57Am I?
14:58Yes, Henry, you are.
14:59But what if that's what he thinks?
15:00That I'm the one with my foot deliberately out the door?
15:03Well, is your foot out the door?
15:04No.
15:05I mean, my foot barely made it in the door in the first place.
15:07Like, it literally just happened yesterday.
15:09So her foot is out the door?
15:11Yes.
15:12No.
15:13Yes.
15:14No.
15:15Well, yes.
15:16It's...
15:17Well, it's on its way currently in the door.
15:18You just need to give her time and stop freaking her out.
15:20By faking a pregnancy?
15:21Yes, it's actually pretty genius.
15:23What?
15:24Let's just say that you're right.
15:25She does have some kind of weird commitment issues.
15:27She literally chose the one thing that stops her from bailing.
15:30She picked you to be her baby daddy in front of her entire family.
15:33I'd say that's pretty all in.
15:34Yeah, but is that fair on Henry?
15:37I kind of think that's on him to decide.
15:39I did drag him into this.
15:40Ah, no you didn't.
15:41He's his own man.
15:42He could have come clean at any point and he hasn't.
15:44Yeah, and I actually think that means something.
15:46I think, I think he wants this.
15:48Mmm, and even if he is right and you are trying to make him eject,
15:51why not let him be the one to eject?
15:53Why self-sabotage your own self-sabotage?
15:57Stick around, Dave.
15:59Oh, my god.
16:00I got you.
16:01as I'm used to keep going.
16:02I couldn't believe he hadn't.
16:03What you've said to me is the second time.
16:04It's just a good time.
16:05You get a good time.
16:06The third time you are playing with Kevin was wearing a queen.
16:08The fourth time you are playing with Kevin,
16:09aren't you thinking to be swive as any or something?
16:10He's going to be揍 a queen of love.
16:11Yeah, he's going to be a queen of love.
16:12He's going to die.
16:13He's going to be one of the desapareges.
16:14Maybe I'm headed for a queen of love.
16:16I'm getting a queen of love.
16:19I'm so happy.
16:21I'm so happy that I'm going to die in the world.
16:22I'm giving up my queen of love.
16:23And I'm getting a queen of love.
16:24Hey, I'm a beautiful girl, and a beautiful girl, and a beautiful girl, and a beautiful girl.
16:30Woo!
16:38Hey.
16:39Hey. How'd you go?
16:41Uh, yeah, I said some pretty irresponsible things.
16:43Oh, gosh, me too.
16:44Yeah, same.
16:45Hey, does that mean I'm part of the group now?
16:49I mean, we are looking for one more person to pin a lot of the blame on, so...
16:53He's not wrong.
16:58This feels so wrong!
16:59Doesn't it?
17:08One more time!
17:09No, no, no, one's good.
17:10One's great!
17:11No, it's beautiful!
17:12Give her 30 years, that'll be us.
17:17Sorry, that was a joke.
17:19I wasn't trying to hold us for 30 years or anything.
17:23Uh, about early.
17:24Henry!
17:25Melissa!
17:26I just want to say I'm sorry, G.
17:29I've been such a buzzkill all night trying to get my girl back.
17:32Sorry, Mandy.
17:33You're so beautiful.
17:35But you know what?
17:36My homie, you're well here.
17:38He's taught me an important lesson.
17:39Live in the moment, man.
17:41Mmm, mmm, mmm.
17:42And this moment belongs to you too.
17:45You're having a baby!
17:47Woo!
17:48Yeah!
17:49Stop it!
17:50I'm really sorry for pushing this fake baby thing onto you.
17:54And if you want out, I'd just really appreciate it if you took the lead and told them the truth.
18:00My money's on twins.
18:01Hell yeah!
18:02Some twins!
18:05Wait!
18:06Wait!
18:10I also have an announcement.
18:12Vaughn and I are getting back together.
18:15For good.
18:16It's his eyes.
18:19Oh, that's so sweet.
18:21Babe, are you serious?
18:22What did you call your new app?
18:24Conspiracy, not conspiracy.
18:25It's gonna be huge, I promise.
18:26Okay, just play our wedding song!
18:28Yes!
18:29Yes!
18:30Let's play it!
18:31Let's play it!
18:37You don't have to hide being happy for them.
18:39Shut up.
18:40I'm just pleased that they're conveniently back together to caution the blow that I'm not pregnant.
18:44Are you gonna tell them?
18:49Look, what if you're right?
18:50What?
18:51Sixteen hours ago, you were about to get on a plane to South America and now we're real after two months of make-believe.
18:59If this pretend pregnancy for three weeks max, in addition to helping you get a house and a backup plan helps us to do this quote-unquote real relationship,
19:11maybe it's worth it.
19:12Henry.
19:14You'd do that?
19:15For me?
19:18I mean, it's kind of what relationships are, right?
19:22Besides, I really don't want to kill their buzzword.
19:24No.
19:29I love you.
19:30I love you.
19:31I love you.
19:32You've got no idea what's going to happen tonight.
19:33Oh.
19:34Yeah.
19:35Yeah.
19:36Yeah.
19:37We're not going to hell for this, are we?
19:40For faking a pregnancy or for using it as a pair of train wheels for our newly minted real relationship?
19:46Henry.
19:47Henry.
19:48Melissa.
19:49Melissa.
19:50I love you.
19:51I love you.
19:52I love you.
19:53Yeah.
19:54Yeah.
19:55Yeah.
19:56Yeah.
19:57Yeah.
19:58Yeah.
19:59Yeah.
20:00Yeah.
20:01Yeah.
20:02Yeah.
20:03Yeah.
20:04Yeah.
20:05Absolutely.
20:06I can't wait.
20:07Don't worry.
20:08That's a lie.
20:09It's a lie.
20:10You don't have to work.
20:11You're a lot.
20:14Absolutely.
20:15I can't wait.
20:16Listen more.
20:17OK.
20:18My grandma's tired now.
20:19You have to sleep.
20:20Don't come back so early or not.
20:22You've got a baby.
20:27Bye-bye.
20:28Bye-bye.
20:31That was too close.
20:32Right?
20:33Way too close.
20:35Your pain makes their pain more bearable?
20:36more bearable? Can you believe Vaughn went through this with Mandy?
20:40Idiot. Lucky mine is fake, so if you don't do it...
20:45I won't tell if you won't tell.
20:47So, remember how I said this was a story of boy meets girl? Boy kisses girl.
20:52Boy and girl entrap each other on a sinking ship headed for disaster?
20:56No, it's not the Titanic. It's just a relationship.
21:06More beginning, it's just a relationship.
21:12Lord, I don't even know how to do your body.
21:17May I change my life?
21:20May I change my life?
21:23May I change my life?
21:27Please snappy.