Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about two Americans who were assaulted with miniature Eiffel Towers in Paris. Then, we find out that the French accents, romance and pastries could have Jason trying some new things.
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00:24Alright, so Chuck, you are on vacation.
00:28Rarely, but yes.
00:29And you've decided to visit beautiful Gay Patty, right?
00:36That's what they called it back in the day, Gay Patty.
00:39Okay.
00:40Right, it was just like beautiful Paris, right?
00:43Sure, yeah, beautiful, yeah.
00:44So you're there, you're walking along the Champs-Elysees.
00:49Very nice.
00:49Lovely, lovely time.
00:51Oui, oui.
00:52Asking for a fresh croissant.
00:54Absolutely.
00:55Yeah, you need one.
00:56And then what?
00:57You okay over there?
00:58Your French is great, man.
00:59You got me.
01:00I'm captivated right now.
01:02I'm like, what's he saying?
01:02I don't know what he's saying, but talk to me.
01:04Captivated.
01:04Canadian schooling.
01:05Yeah, talk to me.
01:07Croissant.
01:08Yeah.
01:08On the Champs-Elysees.
01:10Yeah.
01:11Comment t'allez-vous?
01:11C'est magnifique.
01:13But then, bon chance, some angry street vendors start beating you with miniature Eiffel Towers.
01:19Oh, man.
01:20Ow!
01:21Listen, I swear to God, I don't know why I had one, but as a kid, I had a miniature steel
01:28Eiffel Tower.
01:29If anyone goes to Paris...
01:31Yeah, that's what you...
01:32They get you this.
01:33That's what they do, right?
01:34It must have been it.
01:35I think someone must have given it to my parents or something, but I had it, and I was always
01:39like, you know, if you're young, you have imagination, I had this thing, but if you decided
01:45to turn on someone with that thing, it would be really bad.
01:49Two American brothers were beaten up by angry Parisian street vendors.
01:54Listen, I hate to say it, but they hate us there.
01:57Yeah.
01:57They hate us there, guys.
01:59The tourists, 24 and 28, were visiting the Eiffel Tower this week when they were reportedly
02:04attacked with miniature metal versions of the iconic Parisian landmark.
02:12Yep.
02:12One of the brothers took a blow to the face with a mini Eiffel Tower and was left with
02:16a bleeding nose.
02:17Yeah.
02:18He was treated by first responders.
02:20His injuries were minor.
02:23Comme on the bell du...
02:24The other brother escaped any serious injury.
02:29Police were called following the altercation, but the street vendors had already fled the
02:33scene.
02:34The brothers filed a complaint.
02:37That led to a suspect being arrested and taken into custody.
02:40I guess they were just walking around filming the area.
02:45Yeah.
02:45They just hate tourists, man.
02:47When they filmed these street vendors, we yelled at them to stop.
02:51Well, my guess is they're probably not allowed to be there.
02:55They're always scam artists.
02:56They're always.
02:57Like, look, they're always scam artists.
02:59They'll, like, hand you one and then force you to pay.
03:02You owe me $20.
03:03Yeah.
03:03Force you to pay.
03:04I hate all that.
03:05Me too.
03:05I'm always like, not today!
03:07Not today!
03:08Dude, these are bigger than the one that I had.
03:10These are, like, twice as big.
03:11Oh, they come in all sorts of shapes and sizes, but I believe the bigger ones are what they
03:15were beaten with.
03:16Oh, yeah.
03:16I mean, if I'm going to beat you, I'm grabbing that one.
03:19But if I hit you with the bottom end of the tower, it's lights out.
03:24This comes after a British guy there.
03:28Oh.
03:29What?
03:29Oh, no.
03:30What happened?
03:30Uh-oh.
03:31Bad.
03:31Real bad, I guess.
03:33Was he chopped up?
03:34Oh, no.
03:34Here we go.
03:35Oh, no.
03:36Surprise, surprise.
03:39Surprise, surprise.
03:42What?
03:42A British man there was raped by a taxi driver.
03:47Jeez.
03:48Good God.
03:49Bonjour.
03:50Gay Paris.
03:52Get your baguette.
03:53I'm not really selling Paris here.
03:56You know what's...
03:57Okay.
03:58Wow.
03:58Listen.
03:58Didn't see that.
03:59Should have read a little further ahead.
04:01Mm-hmm.
04:01This is my daughter's, like, dreamland.
04:04Of course.
04:04She has no idea what real life is about, and she thinks, like, Paris has to be...
04:10And it can't be great.
04:12It's amazing.
04:12It can be beautiful.
04:13Guys are getting taken in the taxis.
04:16I don't think you'd have to take me.
04:18With this romantic accordion music, and those sweet French nothings you guys are doing, I'm
04:24like, just give it up in the taxis.
04:25I know...
04:26You need me.
04:26Listen.
04:27I know I've said...
04:28It's romantic.
04:29I've told this story before.
04:31You wouldn't have to take me.
04:33I've told this story before.
04:35When me and my brother were over in the UK, and we were staying at hostels and these, like,
04:40super cheap hotels, this dude from Paris, Pierre, he showed up.
04:48Oh, we got all the ladies.
04:50Yeah.
04:50In one minute, he had brought a girl to his, the bunk area.
04:58You could hear her screams of delight throughout the whole place.
05:02We were like, are you...
05:04You're making Jason Horny.
05:05You're kidding me right now, Pierre.
05:06I'm not screaming.
05:07I'm not screaming.
05:08I'm not, Pierre.
05:09If, Pierre...
05:10Pierre, listen.
05:12He had his fill of Swedish ladies that night.
05:16I'll tell you that.
05:17You still remember him to this day.
05:18He went on to an Italian girl the next night.
05:22Pierre, he would just speak French to them.
05:25He was...
05:25He was okay, but just because he was French with his...
05:28It was...
05:29He...
05:29There's something about it.
05:31There's something about it.
05:32So I understand, Jason.
05:34Now, I've heard that you can walk the streets and, like, in the parks there, there are people
05:38that'll just be banging.
05:41They're just banging on the...
05:42I did not witness any public banging.
05:45But if Jason's giving it up that easy, I guess it could happen.
05:47That's what I'm saying.
05:48Yeah.
05:48I think you get swept up in it.
05:50Yeah.
05:51As long as no one's beating you or, you know, taking you.
05:54This was a plan.
05:56Yeah.
05:56Pierre rolled up.
05:58Yeah, Pierre's like...
05:59Pierre was like, would you like a croissant?
06:00Yeah, exactly.
06:01It's fresh.
06:02Spread your cheeks.
06:03Sure, why not?
06:03That's a crazy reaction.
06:04That's a crazy reaction.
06:06Get in there, Frenchie.
06:08Give me a kiss.
06:12Start with a croissant and then...
06:14I had all that happen and I did not get violated.
06:18I think it's just the exotic nature of it.
06:20Yeah, you gotta live a little.
06:22All right, I wish you all the best.
06:24Yeah, I wouldn't go there, Jason.
06:25Yeah, don't go there.
06:25I'm not going to Gay Petty.
06:27And definitely don't go to Rome.
06:28Oh, yeah.
06:29You'll be in trouble there, too.
06:30Oh, yeah.
06:30Rome's another one.
06:33Some of these places, man, you just get, like, swept up.
06:36Jason putting the gay back in gay Paris.
06:40Put my stamp right on it.
06:42Yeah.
06:43My God.
06:43Well...
06:44I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to go there, but I'm not going to