Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about a guy who started a fire in his house after leaving his sex toys boiling on the stove. A firefighter calls in with a similar story about a guy cooking fake semen and then they watch a video of how to make it at home.
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00:00here's a warning uh well james you should pay attention to this be careful boiling your dildos
00:13clean why what's gonna happen because a dude dirt just set his house on fire doing it oh well i'm
00:19not an idiot dave you can't forget about them that's for sure yeah you don't just leave them
00:24boiling on the stove yeah geez old pete uh this is a crazy story i mean i i didn't realize people
00:33would boil their dildos clean i've never really you know thought about how you okay i will say this
00:41some things you could buy i don't think you can put soap on true yeah so or certain kinds of soap
00:50so it's not going to be dishwasher safe so yeah manners in your own hands so you go for the old
00:56dildo boil yeah why not dildo boil you don't call your friends over like hey you coming for the
01:02dildo boil that's not a soup i want to be what a soup that's the worst name there could be my name's
01:08dildo boil oh no hey there's my buddy dildo that's dildo boil here family name
01:15come from a long line of dildo boil yeah right i'm dildo boil the third yeah oh god you know
01:23what we're known for don't you oh yeah i had a bad thought what uh what is that an egg drop soup
01:28dildo soup no rhymes with rum oh my god you've been doing the show way too long
01:36oh my god oh my goodness who wants some man drop soup uh you got any man drop soup let me check in
01:48the back someone said at least set a dildo timer yeah get your phone all you do is boop boop boop
01:53okay 10 minutes they're clean uh anonymous uh from tampa is with us hey anonymous how are you
01:59yes sir um listening to your boiling dildo story made me think of a call recently that we went on
02:06i'm a firefighter in the tampa area so this guy was boiling fake semen to put into dildos and then
02:13use to make videos oh yeah yeah somehow some way there was an explosion in the room that he was
02:20making this stuff incredible it set up it set off his fire alarm and next you know we're there trying
02:25to figure out what's going on and after a while of just trying to figure it out the whole story came
02:29out and it was uh it was uh much worse than we thought it was dude oh my god anyway it was so
02:34so gross and then hearing your story this morning this made me think of that that was probably about
02:39a month ago let me ask you this what does burning fake semen smell like
02:43uh terrible i don't know i can't even describe nothing in the normal world to compare it to no
02:52none whatsoever all right dude thanks for calling it you have a good day wouldn't you say something else
02:57like what i say fake semen i'm boiling i don't know i have to tell you exactly what it is it might be
03:02like napalm when it lights it might stick to you and never come off what is it made out of i don't
03:09know i've never tried to make fake semen surprisingly look it up how do you make fake semen well i think
03:16it's probably a product right he probably bought a product oh god maybe he bought it and you have to
03:23boil it to activate it that's what i'm thinking i thought he had like a recipe he found some secret
03:28underground fake semen recipe that he was trying to look at that guy he's teaching you how to make it
03:33look at that guy that is disgusting oh my god oh god oh my god i wish i never saw him i don't think
03:41i we can listen to him no i'm sure it looks like yogurt and an egg and some sort of dropper yeah i
03:48don't eyeballing what's eyeballing oh like you i'm just guessing yeah a little estimation i just assumed
03:57that there was actually some product that these because they make does a taste test well that's why
04:02i feel like the guy oh my goodness okay so she's got sour cream fat free eggs is that mayonnaise
04:10why is she doing it wearing a bunny shirt i didn't even see the bunny shirt i couldn't tell you lisa
04:17i didn't even see it i'm sorry oh there it is there it is there's the bunny i didn't even
04:24i don't know lisa i don't know why that's the thing that's the most messed up about this
04:31can you imagine being on the internet with an instructional video on how to make fake semen
04:35i mean i could see myself doing that one day i could see you doing it oh my god it's that'd be a
04:41recipe in your chemical kitchen oh she tastes it she tastes it oh well this i really believe that
04:46this is for her cam show she's put it in a champagne glass oh here she goes oh this is gonna be
04:54this i can't look at this you got it here she goes oh it fell right out of her mouth oh it fell
05:03right out of her mouth she has not oh oh oh she just spit it out jesus i don't know why guys are
05:12doing it got me really messed up i mean i know why they're doing it but my god there's so much of
05:21like that guy right there the first one that comes out when you type in how do you make fake
05:27semen oh my god he's the creepiest looking fella he's so happy about it i know he's way too happy
05:33he's way too happy he feels like he nailed it let's do with something he loves yeah why does he get
05:37he's got to keep showing everybody yeah like let's see his finished product let's let's let's
05:42see if it's for two fingers bro oh my god what's happening oh my goodness oh he finaled he fake
05:52finaled on himself oh he got he got himself on the face huh what he is tasting it how did he
05:59oh he's got to squirt yeah he's got to squirt some stuff wow oh my god all right we're done with
06:06that that's enough so that's what you got to do to get big on youtube
06:10squirt yourself with fake finale stuff oh well well i don't recommend it i don't recommend that
06:18either james there's much more classier ways for you to become yeah i'll stick to making stupid
06:21videos of me playing video games internet popular you don't need to do that
06:25you