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First broadcast 11th February 1990.

A dissatisfied Poirot takes Hastings on holiday to Devon. On a bus trip in the area, they get acquainted with Mary Durrant, an antique dealer.

David Suchet as Hercule Poirot
Hugh Fraser as Captain Hastings
Philip Jackson as Chief Inspector Japp
Pauline Moran as Miss Lemon
Adam Kotz as Norton Kane
Caroline Milmoe as Mary Durrant
Elspet Gray as Miss Penn
David Hargreaves as Sergeant Vinney
Gerard Horan as Police Constable Flagg
Michael Shannon as Mr Baker Wood (as Michael J. Shannon)
Amanda Garwood as Lady Amanda Manderley
Paul Gabriel as Speedy Tours Rep.
Harry Goodier as Billy Arkwright
Jeffrey Perry as Hotel Receptionist
Anne Small as Pianist
Miranda Forbes as Landlady
George Little as Dicker
Ned Williams as First Urchin
Jack Williams as Second Urchin

Category

📺
TV
Transcript
00:00THE END
00:24Isn't it bracing, Poirot?
00:26Bracing, Hastings?
00:27The weather.
00:28No, it is cold and wet.
00:31Did you know, Hastings, that the earth is cooling at a rate of 3 degrees every 12,000 years?
00:36No, I didn't know that, no.
00:38Still, beautiful fountain, isn't it?
00:42It's feeble, Hastings.
00:45Fountains used to be more vigorous. Artistic, too.
00:48I don't know what's wrong with you today, Poirot. Nothing seems good enough for you.
00:53I am finished, Hastings.
00:55Finished?
00:56Yes.
00:58I shall retire, I think.
01:04But you're at the height of your powers, Poirot.
01:06You are being kind, Hastings.
01:08No, I'm not.
01:09And you've got a nice home, devoted friends, a brilliant career.
01:13No, no, no, no, no, mon ami. I am nothing. I have nothing. Poirot is finished.
01:19Penny for the guy, miss.
01:31It's only the beginning of October.
01:33You want to avoid the seasonal rush, don't you?
01:37Where's the guy, anyway? At the front. Come and have a look, if you don't believe us.
01:43Come and sit downstairs, we won't let us in with the guy.
01:45No!
01:46Stop, Reddy!
01:47You clear off, if I got you in here again.
01:49As soon as your back's turned.
01:51You did them out of a penny.
01:53Oh, a good thing too. You don't want to go wasting your money and carry children.
01:57Why shan't, Mr Dicker?
01:59Well, I've got a lot of work to do.
02:02You know, I don't know what their parents can be thinking about.
02:05Oh, indeed.
02:07Well, duty calls, Mr Dicker.
02:10Yes.
02:11Well, if you have any trouble, you just come to me.
02:39I'm worried about Poirot, Miss Lemon.
02:41He's talking about retirement.
02:43That's because he hasn't had an interesting case for five minutes.
02:47I must have had my keys to let myself in.
02:50Is that all it is?
02:52That and the fact someone said he was middle-aged.
02:55Trouble as Mr Dicker kept talking.
02:58Well, he's always been middle-aged.
03:00Have you seen that photograph of him at his christening?
03:02I know.
03:03He looks as though he's about to address a board meeting.
03:06Oh, this fellow I know.
03:08Funny chap.
03:09Well, not funny.
03:10Quite serious, really.
03:11Company director.
03:12Hastings.
03:13As a matter of fact...
03:14Hastings.
03:15Right.
03:16I'm going to take you to the seaside, Hastings.
03:17Your little grey cells are exhausted.
03:18You are in need of the complete overhaul.
03:19Miss Lemon, my tea's on, if you please.
03:23I'm going to take you to the seaside, Hastings.
03:27Your little grey cells are exhausted.
03:29You are in need of the complete overhaul.
03:32Miss Lemon, my tea's on, if you please.
03:37Your little grey cells are on, if you wait to check,
03:44Here, you see,
03:49how much of you need to check inside.
03:52You'll see you, dear contacts.
03:54I'm tired.
03:55After a new one, if you go outside.
03:56I've got you clues?
03:57In her parents.
03:58If you go outside my family,
03:59please hit yourself.
04:00Yes!
04:01Yes!
04:03Yes, please.
04:05Well, this is very nice, Poirot. I wonder where the links are.
04:09No, no, no, no. Hastings, you are not yet well enough for games.
04:12I shall tell you when you are.
04:16It's strange that it's called the Midland Hotel.
04:18That's in the north, Poirot.
04:25Whitcomb is the place for help.
04:30I do hope you are feeling better, Hastings.
04:32Well, we've only been here half an hour.
04:34Ah, yes, but the air here is right now.
04:38Look at the horses. Coats of the highest gloss.
04:41It reminds me of a horse I backed in the Cheltenham Gold Cup.
04:44It started at five to one and came in a quarter past two.
04:47Well, that is not very good, surely.
04:49No. No, it's a joke, Poirot.
04:52Good Hastings. You see, already you begin to make the jokes.
04:59Sometime, you must explain to me this joke.
05:02Yes.
05:04I say, look at that.
05:05My Greatest Cases.
05:07A lecture by the renowned Chief Inspector James Japp of Scotland Yard.
05:11Well, we are not interested, Hastings. We have other foul to pry, huh?
05:14No, no, no. I'd like to hear that.
05:16Admission one shilling.
05:18Oh, mon dieu. That is a lot of money to hear the Chief Inspector Japp.
05:21Women's Institute, Sandringham Street, Thursday 8.30.
05:24Fatsy old Japp being up here.
05:26Fatsy old Japp being up here.
05:27Fatsy old Japp.
05:28Fatsy old Japp.
05:29Fatsy old Japp.
05:30Fatsy old Japp.
05:31Fatsy old Japp.
05:32Fatsy old Japp.
05:33Fatsy old Japp.
05:34That's very reasonable.
05:35Windermere for one and six.
05:36Reasonable if one wants to go to Windermere.
05:37Take it to Windermere, please.
05:38Pretty pretty, lad.
05:39Why don't we give it a go? I've heard there's a pleasant hotel. That's bed and breakfast.
05:44At what time does a train leave?
05:47Well, I don't think it's a train.
05:50A bus, Hastings? No, no, no, no. Poirot does not travel on buses.
05:55Oh, come on, Poirot. It'll be fun.
06:03I say, what a rude fellow.
06:06He rather interested me.
06:08Well, if sheer bad manners interest you.
06:10He interested me because he was growing the moustache.
06:12And as yet, the result is poor.
06:15You do notice the most extraordinary things, Poirot.
06:19But the growing of the moustaches and our tastings.
06:22I have sympathy with all who attempt it.
06:31We were very lucky to get these, you know.
06:34There.
06:40Twelve miniatures of Napoleon's Marshalls by Jean-Baptiste Jacques Augustin.
06:45They're beautiful.
06:47Each one has a lock of the subject's hair in the back and his name written on the ivory.
06:54Isn't that strange?
06:56Now, you're certain you know what to do?
06:59Of course I am.
07:00It'll be all right.
07:01The box will be locked to my suitcase all the way.
07:03Nobody will even see it.
07:05Till the appropriate time, of course.
07:07Of course.
07:08You don't need to worry, you know.
07:11I know, my dear.
07:12But this is your first big commission.
07:15That servant tea service was quite big.
07:18There was a lot of it.
07:19I was quite worried that you wouldn't be able to carry it all.
07:22And I have to be so careful these days.
07:25Well, I'm all packed.
07:26Shall I put the box in my suitcase?
07:28Oh, no.
07:29No, no.
07:30Leave it here till the morning.
07:31And what time does your coach leave?
07:32Half past nine.
07:35Don't worry.
07:36Don't worry.
08:04Thank you very much.
08:05Telegraph, please.
08:12Reception.
08:13Jack!
08:14Ah, hello, Captain Hastings.
08:16This is a pleasant surprise.
08:17I see you're giving a lecture here tomorrow.
08:19Hmm.
08:20Tonight, too.
08:21In Fleetwood.
08:22Friday, Barrow-in-Furness.
08:24For the Benevolent Fund, you know?
08:26Good morning, Hastings.
08:28Well, well.
08:29Prepared for the northern climate, eh, Poirot?
08:33Good morning, Chief Inspector.
08:35Hastings, the coach leaves in five minutes.
08:38What's got into it?
08:41I'll be at Redburn at 12.40.
08:52I don't want to have to hang about there.
08:54No, I know.
08:55I know you've got the more difficult job.
08:59We'll make it.
09:01Don't worry.
09:02I'll wait for you where we were in.
09:05Just so long as there isn't any fuss.
09:07No.
09:08Look, I've got to go now, or I'll miss the bus.
09:10Yes.
09:11You two.
09:32Why are you so beastly to Jack, Poirot?
09:34Beastly Hastings?
09:35Beastly Hastings. It's not these lectures he's giving, is it?
09:38Lectures?
09:41Where can we put our luggage, please?
09:42The luggage around the back.
09:48Oh, sorry again.
09:49You blind or something?
09:52What a rude look, man.
09:55Bonjour, mademoiselle.
09:56Oh, bonjour.
09:57Morning, may I?
10:01That's all right, it wasn't heavy.
10:02All aboard now, all aboard.
10:05We have to look round and round and round and round...
10:09Huh.
10:27So you work for your aunt, Miss Durrant?
10:29Yes. We're specializing in beautiful quality antiques.
10:32Of course, I'm still only learning the business.
10:34I'm sure mademoiselle will be very successful.
10:38Some of them are worth an awful lot of money.
10:40I was surprised.
10:42My aunt's got clients all over the world.
10:44Ah, so she travels a great deal, huh?
10:46Oh, no, not at all.
10:48If someone wants a particular period table or chair or a certain piece of china,
10:52they write to her and she gets it for them.
10:55That's what's happened in this case.
10:57How do you mean?
10:58Well, my aunt got a very valuable set of miniatures for an American collector.
11:02He's over here on a buying trip.
11:04He's staying in a hotel in Windermere.
11:06And if he likes them, then he'll buy them.
11:08I hope so.
11:09I'll have to be ever so careful on the return journey.
11:12I'll have 1,500 pounds in my bag.
11:15In cash.
11:16In cash?
11:17In cash.
11:18In cash.
11:23In cash.
11:24In cash.
11:26This will be clear up.
11:28And, let's go...
11:34Excuse me.
11:36I'm sorry.
11:37Excuse me.
11:46Sorry.
11:53They have no tisane, Hastings?
11:55No.
11:56No, they usually do, but...
11:58You did not ask Hastings, did you?
12:01I couldn't, Poirot.
12:02Never will he ask for the tisane for me.
12:05I don't know what a tisane is.
12:07It's a sort of horrible herb tea.
12:10They're such a scrum out there.
12:12They've only got one chap serving.
12:14Excuse me.
12:19Where has she hurried off to, the little one?
12:22Oh, some women's thing, I expect.
12:24Ah.
12:25Grand girl, isn't she?
12:26Yes, she is very nice, Hastings.
12:28You noticed her eyes?
12:30Very unusual colour.
12:31Oh, most unusual, Hastings.
12:33It is called blue, I think.
12:35Oh, it's a good...
12:37Hastings, why do those people keep staring at me and push each other and laugh?
12:47I don't think they've ever seen anyone quite like you before, Poirot.
12:50Oh, I think I see you.
12:56Where's Miss Durrant?
12:57Hope she doesn't miss the coach.
12:59Why, she is silly, but perhaps not that silly.
13:02Silly?
13:03Well, to tell two perfect strangers that she will shortly be carrying 1,500 pounds in her bag is not the height of sagacity, one of me.
13:09I'm so sorry, rushing off like that.
13:12I was worried about the miniatures.
13:14I thought I saw a man taking my suitcase out of the coach.
13:17I went flying after him and it turned out to be his own.
13:21I felt such a fool.
13:22So your case is all right?
13:24Oh, yes, it's still in the boot.
13:25His was exactly like mine, though.
13:28What man was it, mademoiselle?
13:29It was that man who was so rude.
13:32You know, the one with the sort of moustache.
13:34That is quite curious.
13:36Why did he want his suitcase?
13:38He's staying here in Redburn.
13:41More curious and more curious.
13:43He was happy to pay the full fare to Windermere.
13:46I happened to see his ticket when he presented it.
13:49Poirot loves a mystery, even when there isn't one.
13:52It used to be my profession, Hastings.
13:56You have heard of me, perhaps, mademoiselle?
14:00You're not that conjurer, are you?
14:03Perhaps I am.
14:06Perhaps I am.
14:18No, I'm at Redburn.
14:19No, no, it's all going according to plan at my end.
14:24No trouble at all.
14:27Well, just as soon as you can, for God's sake.
14:30The sooner we're out of the area, the better.
14:34No, it's all right.
14:36I'll take that.
14:37All right.
14:41No, no, just someone wanted to take my case.
14:45Yes, don't be long.
14:46Captain Hastings?
15:02Captain Hastings!
15:04Oh, I'm sorry.
15:06The most awful thing's happened.
15:08What?
15:10They've gone.
15:12The miniatures?
15:13Come and look.
15:16I opened my suitcase.
15:20The miniatures are in this dispatch case inside.
15:22Look.
15:23The lock's just smashed.
15:24Was it like this when you opened it?
15:26Yes.
15:28I don't know what to do.
15:31Poirot, don't worry, Miss Durant.
15:33You stay here.
15:35We'll sort things out.
15:35What are we going to do?
15:42Mon ami, I am Hercule Poirot, detective retired.
15:48I cannot help you, I'm afraid.
15:49I've had to stay here all night.
16:08I've looked everywhere.
16:11You haven't got spare keys.
16:13Of course I haven't.
16:15I thought you might have a passkey.
16:17No, no, not me.
16:18You'd get accusations, wouldn't you?
16:19Suspicions.
16:21You'll have to change the locks.
16:22I can't.
16:24Mr. Prado would never forgive me if he found out I'd lost the keys.
16:28I can't stay here another night.
16:46Hmm.
16:48And these miniature pictures are worth like £1,500, you say?
16:54Yes, at least.
16:55The thief's getting away while we waste time.
16:59It won't get far, Miss, don't you, fret.
17:01His brains and cunning is counselling this job, not brute speed.
17:04I've just spoken to Mr. Wood, the American.
17:07A woman called on him two hours ago, I'm afraid.
17:10Mr. Wood was delighted with the miniatures and paid her for them.
17:13But that's before we arrived here.
17:15Well, a fast car from Redburn would have got here long before us.
17:19Oh, it's all my fault.
17:25Look, Miss Durrant, you can leave this with me.
17:33You get on back to Whitcomb and explain things to your aunt.
17:36Oh!
17:39Right.
17:41And PC Flagg and I will go and interview Mr. J. Baker Wood.
17:45I'll have to talk to my sergeant first, sir.
17:47I'll have to talk to my sergeant first, sir.
18:17You look terrific.
18:37I scarcely recognised you in that get-up.
18:39That's the idea, just in case they've got wind of us.
18:41It's wonderful to see you.
18:46I thought we'd never make it.
18:48Did you have any trouble getting away?
18:50None at all, as it happens.
18:52Just walked out the door, put the case in the car and drove off.
18:55I was shaking.
18:57I expected to hear a shout at any moment.
19:00We've done it.
19:01So far.
19:02You're the cleverest girl in the world, as well as the most beautiful.
19:16She's going to cop it from her auntie, that girl.
19:19Sounds a bright one, she does.
19:20Leaving all that stuff on the bus while she goes off and has her dinner.
19:23It was in the boot of the coach, actually.
19:26I wonder if you're interesting points about this case, you know?
19:28Oh, yes.
19:30Well, why was the dispatch case forced open, for instance?
19:33Well, to get these here little pictures out.
19:35But why?
19:36Surely it would have been simpler to open Miss Durrant's suitcase,
19:38transfer the dispatch case unopened to his own suitcase,
19:41and get away, rather than waste time forcing the lock.
19:43Well, she'd have noticed the difference in weight
19:45as soon as she took the suitcase out the boot, wouldn't she?
19:48And he'd have had less time to make us escape.
19:50Oh.
19:51Oh.
19:53Yes.
19:54Where is that?
20:06Of course I didn't suspect anything.
20:09Why should I?
20:11She said she came from Elizabeth Penn.
20:13She had the miniatures.
20:14May we see the miniatures, please, Mr. Wood?
20:17I guess so.
20:18We'll need a description of this woman, too, sir.
20:23Description?
20:24Was she young?
20:25Pretty?
20:26No, sir.
20:28She most certainly was not young.
20:30Or pretty.
20:32She was tall and elderly.
20:33Gray hair.
20:36She had a blotchy complexion and a budding mustache.
20:40The siren, none of your life.
20:42How did she arrive at the hotel, Mr. Wood?
20:44On a hotel ferry.
20:45All right.
20:49There.
20:52Yes.
20:53I see.
20:55Very nice.
20:57Well, it's $7,000 for 12 of those beauties.
21:00I'll tell you, that's some bargain.
21:03I'll be taking that, sir.
21:05What do you mean?
21:06Evidence of a crime, sir.
21:08Oh, hey, you've got to be kidding.
21:10You'll get a receipt.
21:11Denzel?
21:11Well, we have to assure ourselves who the rightful owner is.
21:15What do you mean, rightful owner?
21:16I'm the rightful owner.
21:17I'm $7,000 worth the rightful owner.
21:19That's not for me to say, sir.
21:21Then don't say it.
21:22I'll say it for you.
21:23Those are my goddamn miniatures.
21:25That's for the court to decide, sir.
21:26You mean you have to come from the railway station
21:56by boat?
21:57The station's on the other side of the vehicle.
21:59There.
22:00Oh, I see.
22:01You know, mine's there.
22:03Good.
22:06Good day.
22:07Good morning.
22:09Mr. Arkwright?
22:10Aye, sir.
22:11Did you bring an elderly lady to the lake hotel today?
22:15I bring lots of old ladies, sir.
22:17Tall, grey-haired, bit of a moustache?
22:19Oh, I picked her up at station at 12 minutes past one.
22:23How are you so sure of the time?
22:25Because the Lancaster train gets in at one o'clock
22:28and it arrived at ten past.
22:30Does that train stop at Redburn?
22:32Redburn?
22:33No.
22:33That's on Maltbrook Line.
22:35Stop at Redburn.
22:36Ha!
22:37Ha!
22:42Mary Durrant arrived at Redburn at about ten past twelve.
22:45I mean, we know that.
22:46We were with her.
22:48An hour later, an old lady is here in Windermere
22:50with the miniatures and on her way to Woods Hotel.
22:53Now, I'm sure it was the fellow with a bit of a moustache
22:55dressed up.
22:56He could have got from Redburn to Windermere
22:58in an hour in a fast car.
23:00But the old lady didn't arrive by car.
23:02She got off a train.
23:03And a train that doesn't go near Redburn at that.
23:09Hastings?
23:12Why do you not grow the moustache?
23:14What?
23:15I did not achieve true facial symmetry
23:17until I grew the moustache.
23:18It caused me great unhappiness as a young man.
23:21I don't want facial symmetry.
23:23I want help.
23:24Ah, well, I am retired, Hastings.
23:26Such puzzles no longer interest me.
23:29I think I will go back to Whitcomb in the morning.
23:35Oh, all right.
23:41Hastings.
23:42Hmm?
23:42The fact that the ferryman picked her up at the station
23:45does not necessarily mean that she got off a train.
24:01If she didn't come by train, how did she come?
24:04Who knows?
24:05Hastings?
24:06You have done well.
24:07But you will be on this case a long time, I think.
24:10Don't I know it.
24:13Right.
24:14I'm going back to Redburn in the morning.
24:16Reconstruct the crumb, that's the thing.
24:18Start from the beginning.
24:19The start of a new life.
24:32I don't think much can go wrong now.
24:33I'll wait for you in the car.
24:40Hey, Rosa.
24:41Here's your change.
24:43Thanks.
24:43Come back and see us again, won't you?
24:58So, as I see it, it started here.
25:01This fellow with a bit of a moustache
25:03had an accomplice with a fast car
25:05who drove him to Windermere
25:06while he got dressed up as a woman in the back seat.
25:08Need to be a pretty sporty car
25:10to do that journey in the time.
25:12What?
25:13Something like that, you mean?
25:15It's him!
25:16Stop!
25:17Don't stop!
25:21Here, that's not meant for chasing.
25:23Get in!
25:23This is a patrol car, not a chase car.
25:26Get in!
25:44Come on!
25:45Come on, get out of the way!
25:46Move over!
25:47Go on!
25:48Out!
25:48Out of the way!
25:51I love you!
25:52I love you!
25:53There's no way they can turn off for a bit.
25:57Not till they get to Peckersdale.
26:04They have turned.
26:05Well, I'm blessed.
26:07Won't get them very far.
26:08It's a dead end, that is.
26:09Only goes to Heming's kit, doesn't it?
26:11I hope we don't meet anyone coming the other way.
26:23Come on!
26:24Come on, Sergeant.
26:36Come on!
26:37Come on, Sergeant.
26:38my god come on right come along madam why can't you leave me alone don't you
26:54know what it's like to love a man well uh no not exactly sergeant come along no
27:03trouble oh it's you again is it i might have known come on why should i help you because that way we
27:25might get your money back i'm gonna get my money back all right my attorney's on his way up here
27:29from london look if we could just all right can we just get on with it ready
27:36well
27:47no right ready
27:56check out
27:58well
28:04now don't hurry i mean take a good look
28:10i mean imagine him dressed up as a woman hat skirt all that sort of thing it's not him
28:15but he's got a mustache you said she had a mustache
28:19the woman who saw me the miniatures was nothing like that
28:22she didn't have a mole like that
28:23like what
28:25well that mole on his forehead for god's sake
28:29couldn't hide that
28:31oh
28:34wait a minute
28:37wait a minute
28:40oh no
28:41that's lady amanda mannerly
28:44who
28:45well don't you guys read the papers i mean she's eloping with that novelist
28:48um
28:49norton kane
28:50are you norton kane
28:52so good of you to come with me mr poirot
29:04no no no not at all my dear
29:06how could i possibly leave such a charming young lady in so great distress
29:09but perhaps now that i am here i can help you to explain this delicate matter to your aunt
29:17oh thank you so much
29:20mary
29:20is that you
29:22how did you go
29:23i've got mr poirot with me aunt elizabeth
29:26we came back to wickham on the bus together
29:28mr poirot is a famous detective
29:31do you think i don't know that
29:33oh you are too kind
29:35but something terrible's happened aunt elizabeth
29:38i don't really know how to tell you
29:43i regret to inform you that
29:47your minotaures
29:48they have been stolen
29:51stolen
29:52but
29:54how could they be stolen
29:56where were they stolen from
29:58they were stolen from the bus when we stopped for lunch at redburn
30:04but have no fear
30:06it will not be long before the miscreants are apprehended
30:10don't give us away to my father will you
30:15oh no of course not
30:16whereabouts you're headed
30:18can't tell you
30:20cheer up captain hastings
30:23oh yes
30:24i'm sure you'll catch your robber
30:27yes well with our one and only suspect gone
30:48i'm damned if i know how we're gonna catch him
30:51hey captain hastings
30:53i think i'll start with the fish soup
31:16followed by the haddock
31:17try and shake up the old gray cells a bit
31:20you see what i can't understand is
31:24if norton kane wasn't the woman with the moustache
31:27who wants
31:27would you have done your best hastings
31:30the renowned chief inspector japp
31:32would have given up long ago
31:33thank you
31:34you're not jealous poirot are you
31:36japp being asked to give these lectures
31:38jealous
31:39non de dieu
31:42what interest is it to poirot the whitcomb institution for women huh
31:47if it was a royal society now
31:49but then i hardly think the chief inspector japp would be invited by the royal society
31:54it is only the institution for women at whitcomb and such places that they will listen
31:59to the chief inspector japp claiming the cases of a q poirot for his own
32:03oh i'm sure japp wouldn't do that
32:06hastings can we please talk of something else
32:07the renowned chief inspector japp is of no interest
32:10no thank you
32:11i've got to see mary durrant tomorrow
32:15here we are
32:17perhaps you should bring mademoiselle durand and her aunt and monsieur jay bakerwood
32:22first on first
32:23and discuss this thing
32:25i don't see what good that'll do
32:28i don't know what i'm going to say to her and her aunt anyway
32:35sleep is the thing hastings
32:38for myself i fully intend to get to bed immediately after dinner
32:42and i strongly advise you to do the same
32:44not too old sir
32:49light
32:56you
33:03you
33:07you
33:17Oh, my God.
33:47Good evening, sir.
33:57Good evening, customer.
34:05Welcome to your daughter on the stage, Mr. Wernington.
34:09A fine song by Mr. Noel Coward.
34:12And the same holds true in police force.
34:14I don't know if you're sorry for the detection business.
34:18Because detection is a darn lonely business,
34:21and detectives are perhaps inclined to be lone wolves,
34:25if you'll pardon the expression.
34:28And at the conclusion of a case,
34:30there are always other parties, not of the police force,
34:34who will claim to have solved it.
34:35I refer, of course, to that bane of the policeman's life,
34:40the amateur sleuth.
34:42Or worse still, the professional private detective.
34:47The professional private detective, ladies and gentlemen,
34:49is not the glamorous figure of fiction.
34:52He is a man who, failing in more worthy walks of life,
34:56and being of meddlesome and troublemaking disposition,
35:01finally comes to rest in a dingy office over the chip shop,
35:05where he plies for hire in the sordid world of petty crime and divorce.
35:12Except, I have to say,
35:15for one.
35:15I have been fortunate in my career,
35:20in that many, indeed perhaps most, of my cases
35:23have been shared with that most extraordinary of private detectives.
35:27And, if I may borrow a word from his own native tongue,
35:32that doyen of the Belgian police force,
35:37Monsieur Hercule Poirot.
35:39I think I may say, without fear of contradiction,
35:44that Hercule Poirot has one of the most original minds
35:47of the 20th century.
35:49Intelligent,
35:51brave,
35:53sensitive,
35:54devastatingly quick,
35:57Hercule Poirot stands head and shoulders
35:59above any other detective of my considerable experience.
36:09I say, Miss Lemon,
36:24I'm fearfully worried about the keys.
36:27Order and method, Miss Lemon.
36:30Order and method.
36:33The Lagonda's got a hole in him, Miss Lemon.
36:36The fill is on fire and the keys are bent.
36:39Cent tonnerre,
36:41deux cassons sur le feu de joie.
36:46The little gray cells, Miss Lemon,
36:49reconstruct the scene of the crime mon ami.
36:52Come up to door.
37:12Take keys out of bag.
37:19Unlock the door.
37:24Penny for the guy, Miss.
37:25I come in.
37:26You'll get it off.
37:27Dicker follows, still talking,
37:30shortening,
37:31encouraging,
37:33wasting all your money.
37:37Oh, it works.
37:42It really works.
37:44Come now, Hastings.
37:49Tell me where you stand in this case
37:51and Poirot will do his humble best to assist.
37:54No, it's no good.
37:55I don't stand anywhere with the case, really.
37:58Anyway,
37:59I'm the one who's got to face the music.
38:02Well?
38:02Captain Hastings.
38:10Hello, Miss Durant.
38:11Have you got some news?
38:12Well,
38:12no,
38:13not really.
38:15No,
38:15I understand.
38:17Hello,
38:17Monsieur Poirot.
38:18Mademoiselle.
38:19I haven't given up yet.
38:21The shop of your aunt is beautiful,
38:23mademoiselle.
38:24We should love to see you,
38:25if you can spare a moment.
38:26We would be delighted.
38:28Monsieur Poirot's here,
38:30Aunt Elizabeth.
38:31And Captain Hastings.
38:32Oh,
38:33how nice.
38:34Have you managed to retrieve our miniatures for us,
38:39Monsieur Poirot?
38:40Oh,
38:40pardon,
38:41mademoiselle.
38:41It is Captain Hastings who is in charge of this affair.
38:44And he hasn't,
38:45I'm afraid.
38:46Well,
38:46we found them all right,
38:47but we can't retrieve them.
38:49Mr.
38:49Wood says he bought them in good faith,
38:51so they're his.
38:52So he's still got them?
38:54I know the police have taken them.
38:56Well,
38:56I'll get them back in due course.
38:59Well,
38:59that depends on what the court decides.
39:02It would help if we could catch the theme.
39:04I believe.
39:06Oh,
39:07my God.
39:08What is it,
39:09Captain Hastings?
39:12I've got it.
39:14I've got it.
39:15I've got it.
39:16Miss Penn,
39:16I can get your miniatures back.
39:18You may be able to help,
39:19too.
39:20Excuse me.
39:23Hastings,
39:23wait.
39:24Come on,
39:24Poirot.
39:25What the earth are you playing at,
39:26Hastings?
39:26I've got it,
39:27Poirot.
39:27What?
39:28What have you got?
39:28The answer to this case.
39:30It must have been the haddock.
39:31I feel wonderful.
39:33Hastings,
39:33I'll see you in the hotel later.
39:51As soon as I said it,
39:52I knew.
39:53Who knew Miss Durrant was on her way with the miniatures?
39:55Who could have found out she'd be stopping at Redburn at lunchtime?
39:58And who had a fast car to get into Windermere?
40:01I don't know.
40:01Who?
40:02Jay Baker Wood himself,
40:03of course.
40:04Really?
40:04I don't believe any woman ever came to see him.
40:06I think he went to Redburn and stole the miniatures himself.
40:10What about the ferryman?
40:12Well,
40:12all he said was he'd picked up a woman at the station and taken her to the Lake Hotel.
40:16I imagine he takes a dozen women a day to the Lake Hotel.
40:18All right.
40:20But I don't know what you're going to do.
40:22Well,
40:22it's quite simple,
40:23really.
40:24You see,
40:24Wood has never met Miss Penn or Miss Durrant.
40:28I've asked him to come over from Windermere.
40:30Now,
40:30when he sees this beautiful young girl and her aunt in a wheelchair...
40:34What?
40:35Well,
40:36he's going to feel pretty damn small,
40:37I can tell you.
40:39Really?
40:39Oh,
40:40yes.
40:41I mean,
40:41even a hardened criminal like him isn't entirely without a hard chap.
40:45Come on.
41:02If you'd like to follow me,
41:03there's a table for two over by the window.
41:07I hope they're not going to be late.
41:08The timing's absolutely crucial.
41:10Since I am not going to be told what is going on in this case of yours, Hastings,
41:13I can make no intelligent contribution to any discussion of it.
41:16Well,
41:16it was your idea.
41:17You didn't want anything to do with it.
41:18It was my idea also to bring together these three people.
41:21Monsieur Wood,
41:22Mlle Durrant,
41:23and Mlle Penn.
41:24I don't remember that.
41:25Now,
41:25now.
41:32Here you are.
41:33Thanks.
41:34Thanks.
41:34Thanks.
41:53Thanks.
41:54We could have another plate of them sandwiches.
42:16You should have made them last.
42:19I thought the property was coming later.
42:24Steady, steady, steady now.
42:48Here we go, Sarge.
42:50Well, they've arrived.
42:51The old one in the wheelchair, like you said.
42:54I should be sitting there.
42:56It's not going to be sitting here.
42:57I can't see anything.
43:00How good of you to come, Miss Mayer.
43:02Do sit down, Miss Durrant.
43:03What a handsome room.
43:05This is Chief Inspector Jap of Scotland Yard.
43:08How exciting.
43:10How do you do?
43:11Why don't you sit next to Monsieur Poirot, Miss Mayer.
43:15Come, Zane.
43:15Aunt Elizabeth was so hoping you'd have good news for us.
43:20Well, I hope so, too.
43:22If that's all, just hope.
43:24It's all right, Mary, dear.
43:27Oh, dear child.
43:28She's so protective on my behalf.
43:32Now, Miss Mayer, may I offer you something to eat or a cup of tea?
43:35I'd love a cup of tea.
43:37What's happening now?
43:38Nothing.
43:40Just gabbing.
43:41One learns patience sitting in a wheelchair, Monsieur Poirot.
44:08I am sure that his Truman was there.
44:16The captain's standing up.
44:19Oh, it's the Yank.
44:20He's arrived.
44:21It's very good of you to come.
44:23You have the miniatures?
44:24All in good time.
44:26You said I'd get them back.
44:28I've driven all this way in a wild goose chase.
44:32I thought this hotel was going to spoil the coastline,
44:35but at certain times, seen through the mist or at sunset,
44:38it really looked like...
44:38Oh, Mademoiselle Penn, the mist is beginning to clear, I think.
44:42I don't think you've met Miss Durrant.
44:45What do you do?
44:46I feel unwell, Mary.
44:48And Miss Penn.
44:49Look, this is all very nice, but I didn't...
44:52No, I've never met Mr. Wood.
44:54We've only...
44:55Mr. Wood.
44:56Come along, Mary.
45:01My aunt isn't feeling well.
45:02Hold on, hold on.
45:05Mademoiselle Penn.
45:05How did you know it was Mr. Wood, Mademoiselle Penn?
45:13Nobody has mentioned his name.
45:17Well, I didn't.
45:18I just...
45:19You could not possibly have known him.
45:21Not unless it was you who took the 1,500 pounds from him for the miniatures.
45:26Why, it was her.
45:29Made up to look like a frump.
45:30But it was her.
45:33No, it made up to make everybody else think that it was a man.
45:38Dressed as a woman.
45:40And Miss Palmer, Moselle Penn.
45:43You thought that you would keep the money and get back the miniatures as stolen property.
45:50Wait a minute.
45:52She would...
45:53Nice work if you can get it.
45:54So, Miss Penn, what do you say to all this?
46:06She's off, Sarge!
46:07Stop her!
46:08All right, that's you.
46:09Take her away, Sergeant.
46:10And now, Mademoiselle.
46:24You.
46:25And her!
46:26Not so fast, Miss.
46:27Slop and bolt up!
46:32But she...
46:33I didn't.
46:36I mean...
46:37Hastings couldn't see it at first.
46:47He was trying to work out how the miniatures got from Redburn to Windermere.
46:51Yeah, quite.
46:52Exactly.
46:52Then he realized they'd never even been in Redburn.
46:55Masterly, Hastings, you diagnosed the true nature of that crime.
46:58Oh.
47:00Unfortunate, of course, that you set the trap for quite the wrong culprit.
47:07Excuse me.
47:09Merci.
47:10Excuse me, sir.
47:12You forgot your receipt.
47:13Ah, merci beaucoup.
47:14I hope you enjoyed your stay.
47:16Yes, indeed.
47:17Gentleman.
47:19Allow me, Poirot.
47:22There's something about you here, Jap.
47:23Chief Inspector Jap to speak in North Country Lecture Tour.
47:29You knew!
47:31That's why you dragged me all the way up here.
47:33No, no.
47:34It was the other side I was interested in.
47:36I did not know that...
47:38Learn to speak French like a Frenchman?
47:43In Belgium, Hastings, it is considered quite bad form
47:46to read another person's newspaper cuttings.
47:50Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho