Malcolm In The Middle Season 3 Episode 20 Jury Duty
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00:01What?
00:04Those kids!
00:11Not my Frampton comes alive!
00:30Oh!
00:32Honest Dad, we didn't even know you had a watch!
00:39Thank God they paved the driveway last year.
01:00You're not the boss of me now, and you're not so big.
01:05You're not the boss of me now.
01:08You're not the boss of me now.
01:11You're not the boss of me now, and you're not so big.
01:18Life is unfair.
01:23Jury duty? They want me to do jury duty?
01:27I can't believe this!
01:29You can't do it. You simply can't do it.
01:32Spring break is coming up. The boys are gonna be out of school.
01:35I can't be expected to handle them by myself!
01:38I'm sorry, you're just gonna have to tell them no!
01:41That's not one of the options, Hal.
01:44The thinking! Forcing someone to sit on a jury!
01:47This is America!
01:49I don't have a choice!
01:50Oh, yes you do.
01:55You wanna get out of jury duty?
01:57You just let me handle this.
02:00We the jury promise to faithfully uphold!
02:06This is gonna be great!
02:10I've never been ice fishing before.
02:12It combines my two favorite things in life.
02:15Ice and holes.
02:17Just a bunch of guys roughing it.
02:19A true test of courage and determination.
02:22Man against the elements.
02:24No crusts on mine, please and thank you.
02:27I hope you guys packed enough toilet paper for four people!
02:32You're kidding me!
02:33How'd you get Piyama to give you permission?
02:35I don't need my wife's permission.
02:37I baited her into a fight and she kicked me out for a couple days.
02:40Yeah!
02:45Oh my God, Dewey!
02:46You're not gonna believe what just happened!
02:48Where were you?
02:49We were supposed to go exploring in the sewer!
02:52I waited two hours for you!
02:54Dewey!
02:55You're not listening!
02:56This is incredible!
02:57But you promised!
02:58You said that when spring break started, you would take me!
03:02I did all your chores!
03:04I did all your homework!
03:06I took your antibiotics for you!
03:08I put-
03:09Dewey!
03:10Just shut up!
03:11We're trying to tell you something important!
03:13We just saw Stevie's mom naked!
03:16And she's a total babe!
03:18It was amazing!
03:19We were over at Stevie's getting stuff with the sewer!
03:22When all of a sudden, we hear something behind us!
03:25We turn around, and there she was!
03:28In the hallway!
03:29Naked!
03:30Fuck!
03:31Naked!
03:32Except for our shower cap!
03:33It was crazy!
03:34First she was screaming, then Stevie was screaming, then I was screaming!
03:38Yeah, why'd I do that?
03:40And then she tore the curtains off the wall!
03:42To cover her up!
03:43But you could still see right through the curtains!
03:46I'm so glad they just remodeled!
03:48That is not a good reason!
03:51Mom walks around here naked all the time!
03:54She was naked this morning!
03:56She was naked in the-
03:57Dewey!
03:58If you just combine those two things in my head, I will kill you!
04:04No, we're good!
04:05So anyway, she was crawling down the hall with the curtain-
04:07Hell, I gotta get going!
04:10Where are the boys?
04:11They went to the library!
04:12I know, I know!
04:14But if they were doing something really dangerous, they'd have come up with a better lie!
04:18So, deliberations start today!
04:22Nervous?
04:23Nice try, Hal!
04:24You know I can't talk about the trial!
04:26Okay, okay!
04:28So is the councilman as tall as he seems to be on TV?
04:32Hal!
04:33Hal!
04:34I knew it!
04:35Your eyebrow went up!
04:36It did not!
04:37It's the panty bandit, isn't it?
04:40This isn't right, Lois!
04:42We're married!
04:43We tell each other everything!
04:45We've never kept secrets from each other in our entire relationship!
04:49What are you talking about?
04:50I keep secrets from you all the time!
04:52Oh, fine!
04:53Go!
04:54I want to keep you from your big secret trial!
05:07Thank you very much!
05:10For what?
05:12Oh, nothing!
05:13Nothing at all!
05:15You didn't say a word!
05:18This sucks!
05:29We've been here 15 hours!
05:31We haven't caught a single fish!
05:33How much longer is this gonna take?
05:36You never know!
05:37I've been ice fishing my entire life!
05:40Never even seen a fish!
05:42I'm with Francis!
05:43I got bored on the drive down here!
05:46Can we at least talk about something?
05:48About what?
05:49I don't know!
05:50We could use this opportunity to get to know each other a little better!
05:58You know, one time I walked in on my two dads making love!
06:08Guilty!
06:11Not guilty!
06:13That's seven guilty and five not guilty!
06:18So, I guess the point of contention for those of you who don't think that Marty did steal the motorcycle!
06:24Look, if it'll get us out of here earlier, I don't mind changing my vote!
06:28What?
06:29I don't feel that strongly either way!
06:31Yeah, me too!
06:33Which side was winning again?
06:35This is not a question of winning!
06:38And I don't think we should be voting whichever way gets us out of here the fastest!
06:42Well, we have to have some basis for deciding!
06:45There was a trial!
06:47And evidence!
06:48And laws!
06:49Yeah, yeah, yeah!
06:50Let's just vote one more time before we, you know, get into all that detail!
06:54We might just get lucky!
06:56Do the five people who voted not guilty want to change their votes?
07:00Me!
07:01Whatever!
07:02There you go!
07:03It's unanimous!
07:04Wait!
07:05Wait!
07:06What do you think you're doing?
07:09You can't send a 17-year-old kid to jail just because you want to go home early!
07:14For God's sake we took an oath!
07:16Lady, did you vote guilty?
07:18Yes!
07:19Because...
07:20Then there's no problem!
07:21We're all just agreeing with you!
07:23Let's go!
07:26Fine!
07:31Then I vote not guilty!
07:44This is cool!
07:45There's no alligators down here, right?
07:46Now, that's just made up!
07:47But if there were, it'd probably be blind!
07:48Or albino!
07:49Or transparent!
07:50But that's not real!
07:51This is so cool!
07:52He hasn't shut up all morning!
07:53I mean, I was just as excited the first time Francis took us!
07:54It's actually kinda cute!
07:55Did you get the snake?
07:56What?
07:57No!
07:58No!
07:59No!
08:00No!
08:01No!
08:02No!
08:03No!
08:04No!
08:05No!
08:06No!
08:07No!
08:08No!
08:09No!
08:10No!
08:11No!
08:12No, no!
08:19Dude, finish your story!
08:20Ok!
08:21So, then we noticed that she was standing there!
08:23Bucks naked!
08:24And then I went like this!
08:26And then Malcolm was like this!
08:28It was incredible!
08:30The sun came through the window behind her!
08:33It looked like she was glowing!
08:35A naked, glowing angel!
08:39Hey, Stevie, back me up on this.
08:43That's what she looked like, right?
08:45Can we go now? I get delayed.
08:48No, rear.
08:49No, wait, front.
08:51I'll scout ahead.
08:57What?
08:57You're talking about his mom.
08:59Change his subject. Show some class.
09:02Okay, I get it.
09:04Woo, Stevie, is that you or the sewer?
09:09It turns out it wasn't a boil they removed,
09:13but the vestiges of my unborn twin.
09:18Okay, let's just go.
09:20Yeah.
09:20Good idea.
09:26Okay, here's something interesting.
09:32There's a gigantic bear out there.
09:35Don't worry about it.
09:36There are grizzlies all over.
09:37We're just part of living in Alaska.
09:39How far away is it?
09:50Well, answer the question.
09:56It's open.
09:56I thought we were having lunch today.
10:02What?
10:03Oh, I'm sorry.
10:05What's all this?
10:06Just some research I'm doing on the trial Lois got assigned to.
10:10Oh, my God.
10:12The Reyes case?
10:13Did she say anything about the four-fingered magician?
10:16Was he any good?
10:17She won't tell me anything.
10:19I had to dig all this stuff up on my own.
10:21Half the information is being suppressed from the jury.
10:24Now Lois will have to find Monaghan guilty.
10:27Why wouldn't she?
10:28He did it.
10:29Oh, you're a fool.
10:31Everyone knows that the wife killed him.
10:33What are you talking about?
10:34She loved him.
10:36Didn't you read the letter?
10:37If she was so innocent, how come she didn't admit to being married before?
10:41Because she was underage and it was annulled a week later.
10:45It means absolutely nothing.
10:47The judge already ruled that inadmissible.
10:49This is the same judge that wouldn't allow the cab driver to testify.
10:53Well, if the wife did it, why did four witnesses say they saw a man leave the crime scene?
11:02Oh, you mean a man like this?
11:08You just drew hair off.
11:10And if I could do it, she could do it.
11:12Did you know that she spent two years working at the Windmill Dinner Theater?
11:17Let me see that.
11:19Okay, here's our mark.
11:32When we came down here with Francis, this is the farthest we've ever gone.
11:36This is it?
11:38This is as far as you went?
11:40Who would brag about this?
11:43Mr. Alligator?
11:45So, Stevie, did your mom go to college?
11:48What?
11:49You know, did she get a degree or something?
11:52I'll bet she was in a sorority.
11:54Wait a minute.
11:55Unless we thought some girl named Molly Hatchet ruled, this isn't our mark.
12:00No, this has to be it.
12:02We went right, right, straight, left, right, left, straight, and right again.
12:07No, we went right, left, left, then straight, left, right, straight.
12:13Oh, man.
12:14Oh, man.
12:15We're lost.
12:16What?
12:17No!
12:18Oh man, we're lost!
12:25What? No!
12:27Oh man, what are we going to do?
12:30Nice. We'll get him crying in the pants.
12:33No, we really are lost!
12:35What? What are we going to do?
12:37I knew it! I knew you were going to find some way to ruin this for me.
12:41Even when you're trying to be nice, you make me miserable.
12:45And now I get to die in the sewer!
12:49A perfect end to a crappy life!
12:52Shut up, do we?
12:54Alright, let's just focus on finding a way out of here.
12:57Stevie's mom must be worried about it.
12:59Shut up about my mom!
13:02What? I simply made a comment.
13:05You're a perv!
13:07I can't help without a healthy interest in the opposite sex.
13:10Well, they don't return the favor.
13:15What does that mean?
13:17Girls hate you!
13:19That's not true!
13:21Yes it is.
13:22Come on Reese, you're a joke.
13:25Yeah, even I know it.
13:27So, Marty claims he was at work, but his boss says he didn't show up until 6 o'clock.
13:40Now we've got the attendant at the gas station who puts Marty's whereabouts there between 4 and 4.30.
13:46And as we all remember from the testimony...
13:48Can we vote again?
13:50What's the use? We've been through this five times.
13:53We vote guilty, she votes not guilty.
13:56We vote not guilty, she votes guilty.
13:59Yeah, so you go first this time.
14:02Alright, I abstain.
14:05What is it that you want, lady?
14:08I want you to do your job.
14:10I want you to weigh the facts of this case and make a reasoned decision.
14:15You have got the sworn testimony of the arresting police officer in which he clearly states...
14:21Yeah, if you believe what he says.
14:23Okay.
14:24That's fair enough.
14:26It is a question of credibility.
14:28On one hand, you have a 17-year-old high school dropout with a history of reckless behavior.
14:33And on the other, you have a 20-year veteran of the police force.
14:37Well, you sure as hell can't trust the cops.
14:39They're always coming up with ways to get you.
14:41That's right. My neighbor's a cop and he's got a 30-foot boat in his front yard.
14:47Now, how can he afford a 30-foot boat on a policeman's cell?
14:51Cops are always getting away with stuff like that.
14:53Oh, yeah.
14:54They start now. I tell you, when I was a kid...
14:56Stop!
14:58This is not about how you feel about cops.
15:03This is not about who you like and who you hate.
15:06This is about what you believe happened based on the facts of the trial.
15:11Did Marty or did Marty not in fact steal the motorcycle?
15:16Wait, I thought Marty was the cop.
15:20Yeah.
15:21That's what I thought.
15:23Fine.
15:24Let's go through this again.
15:26Oh, no.
15:27Yes.
15:29Is it okay to hate you?
15:31Absolutely.
15:32But the money was really being funneled to Mr. Reyes' mistress and their love child.
15:48Once Monaghan found out, it was good night, Mr. Reyes.
15:53You've got nothing.
15:56There were witnesses who saw him argue with the victim.
15:59He can't account for his whereabouts when the murder occurred.
16:03And they found the murder weapon in his car.
16:07Means, motive, and opportunity.
16:10It's all a little too neat.
16:12Because he's guilty.
16:14My gut says the partner didn't do it.
16:17Just saying so doesn't make it so.
16:20Talk to this guy.
16:23You're an idiot!
16:29Oh, my God!
16:30That thing's a monster!
16:32Calm down.
16:33I've been around Barrett for 40 years.
16:35There's nothing to worry about.
16:36Really?
16:37Yep.
16:38All we gotta do is stay real quiet.
16:41Pretty soon he'll get bored and fly away.
16:44That is, unless he's protecting his eggs.
16:47This is crazy!
16:49We can't stay here!
16:51Somebody's gotta make a run for the truck and go get help.
16:54That's a suicide mission!
16:55The bear will run down anyone that goes out there!
16:58Well, what are we supposed to do?
16:59We can't stay here and starve to death!
17:02He's right.
17:04I say we try it.
17:05I vote for Eric.
17:06What?
17:07Go to hell!
17:08I'm not going out there!
17:09You go out there!
17:10Hey!
17:11I have a wife at home to take care of!
17:13Oh, and my life doesn't mean anything?
17:15How about Artie?
17:16He's the camp outcast!
17:17Big deal!
17:18Pete's just a toothless old cote!
17:21It's a miracle he's lived this long!
17:23I should've slit your throat when I had the chance!
17:26What is it?
17:27I've got more years than I did!
17:29Help!
17:32This all looks the same.
17:35Yes, this is the same.
17:38It's all been exactly the same ever since the day I was born.
17:43I start to trust them.
17:45They make me regret it!
17:47I get my hopes up, and then they destroy them!
17:50I shut up!
17:52We get it!
17:55Every girlfriend you ever had lets you cry like a baby!
17:58What?
17:59Oh, who's Mr. Big Shot now?
18:02I'm a joke with the girls, huh?
18:04Well, what's worse?
18:05Being a joke or being a crybaby?
18:08I wasn't crying that hard!
18:11You wet your pants!
18:14Oh, like you've ever even been with a girl!
18:16I have a note from my doctor!
18:20I could get a doctor if I wanted to!
18:22That doesn't even make sense!
18:24That's right!
18:26Turn on each other!
18:28Well, you know what?
18:29No girls like any of you!
18:32And I don't blame them!
18:34You're all pathetic!
18:41You know who's a joke?
18:43Girls!
18:44Yeah!
18:45Why don't we even like them?
18:46They make our lives miserable!
18:47You can never understand what they want!
18:49They're always saying,
18:50Stop staring at me!
18:51And they don't laugh at farts!
18:52They only want to talk about clothes!
18:54They cry all the time!
18:58Yeah, this is helping us get out!
19:04Time!
19:05Time!
19:06Time!
19:07Eleven minutes!
19:08In your face!
19:11Gee, the wife did have time to run down here from home!
19:15That leaves her two minutes to stab him, remove the head, and still make it to the party in time!
19:24It all makes sense!
19:25Oh!
19:26And the blood just magically jumped from the wife's clothes to Monaghan!
19:30Do you really need this spelled out for you?
19:34After killing her husband, she ran back, took off the bloody suit, and rubbed it all over the unconscious Monaghan!
19:40Impossible!
19:41You just don't want to be proven wrong!
19:44I am not wrong!
19:46The knife entered at a downward angle!
19:49She was five foot two, he was six foot four!
19:53She'd have had to ask him to pick her up so she could stab him!
19:56She could have stood on something!
19:58Oh!
19:59So she brought a step ladder with her to the alley!
20:02Look!
20:03Right here's a milk crate!
20:05She could have hidden behind the dumpster, stood on the milk crate, pulled out the knife,
20:10and stabbed him several times with a downward motion like this!
20:22I may be fat, stupid, color blind, and dyslexic, but at least I don't have three nipples!
20:29You shut your trap!
20:30That's a mole!
20:31And you!
20:32Your family changed their name so you couldn't track them down!
20:37No one will miss you!
20:38I'm pretty sure it started with an O!
20:41All three of you are useless, pea-brained idiots!
20:44And for your information, I do suffer more than everybody else!
20:49This is ridiculous!
20:50Let's just vote on it!
20:51Who votes for Francis?
20:54Who votes for Eric?
20:57Artie?
20:59Pete?
21:01Four votes!
21:02The hardest spoken!
21:03No, you tricked me!
21:04No!
21:05No!
21:06No!
21:07He'll reject me!
21:08I...
21:09I tried me!
21:10I chased off!
21:11No!
21:12No!
21:13No!
21:18All right.
21:20That's the worst thing any of us has ever done.
21:23I'm not proud of it, but I really don't think we had a choice.
21:27Like I care about your opinion on anything.
21:31Wait a minute.
21:33Why don't we hear eating?
21:36He got to the truck!
21:38Pete!
21:39Pete!
21:40Pete!
21:41See you backstabbing sons of bitches in hell!
21:47So the witness saw Marty gassing up the motorcycle a half an hour after the owner said it went missing.
21:53Doesn't that gas station close at five o'clock?
21:55Not on Fridays.
21:56She pointed that out in the transcript.
21:59Uh...
22:00I think we're ready for another vote.
22:03Lois?
22:07Go ahead.
22:08By a show of hands, who thinks the defendant is guilty?
22:13Great.
22:14Let's go tell the judge.
22:16Wait!
22:18I don't think Marty is guilty.
22:21What?
22:22I went through all these papers and it says the kid sings in a church choir.
22:27I just don't feel a church going boy would do something like this.
22:31That is not fact.
22:32That's bias.
22:33You are basing a decision on feelings that have nothing to do with facts.
22:38Facts are things.
22:42Like witnesses seeing Marty steal the bike.
22:45Like Marty being apprehended while he was driving the stolen bike.
22:50Like Marty pulling tons of stupid stunts just like this one.
22:54Those are the facts.
22:55I just don't want to send that poor boy to jail.
22:58Oh, believe me.
22:59Jail is going to do a lot more good than three years of military school ever did.
23:04Military school?
23:06I didn't read anything about military school.
23:08I didn't see anything about military school.
23:09Oh, yeah.
23:10Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
23:11I know I saw that somewhere.
23:12I don't think so.
23:14Didn't he drop out of vocational school?
23:16That's right.
23:17After he transferred from the private school where he got caught messing around with the teacher's aide.
23:22You don't understand.
23:23I know for a fact that Francis went...
23:26Who?
23:27Oh, my God.
23:35I think I have to excuse myself from this jury.
23:38All in favor?
23:43I'm trying to be the best me I can be.
23:46But I don't know what to say to girls, so I just say something mean.
23:51I guess I'm afraid of getting hurt, so I hurt them first.
23:53I think my problem is I get so frustrated over the things I can't control.
23:59I forget that there are people with their own will and their own needs.
24:03I play mind games.
24:07It's all I have.
24:10Why isn't there ever a flash flood when you need one?
24:14You know, I really want a girlfriend.
24:17I want someone to hang out with.
24:18That's what I really want.
24:20Yeah, someone you can talk to.
24:21Someone to hug.
24:24Someone to show my poetry to.
24:27You write poetry?
24:30I dabble.
24:32What do you guys think about Brenda Pollack?
24:35She's really nice. I think she'd be good for you.
24:38You'd make a cute couple.
24:40I thought so, too.
24:42Hey, I know this sounds weird.
24:44But can I read you something I wrote?
24:46We'd love it.
24:47We're good.
24:48Hey.
25:06What happened?
25:07What happened?
25:08Did you read them your poetry?
25:16You guys couldn't even do this right.
25:19I really want to serve on another jury.
25:22I know.
25:22I messed up this time, but the next time I will do it right.
25:25I'm not responsible for scheduling that.
25:28I'm sure you have connections.
25:30Please, I just need another chance.
25:32Seems there was some kind of mistrial earlier.
25:34Now everything's backed up.
25:36You're going to have to wait.
25:36I'll do the best I can.
25:38If you promise to stop bothering me right now.
25:42Deal!
25:43I gotta go.
25:44My husband's probably going crazy without me.
25:46I'd say you are the best I can.
25:48I try.
26:01Bye-bye.
26:02Bye-bye.
26:02Bye-bye.
26:04Bye-bye.
26:04Bye.
26:05Bye-bye.