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  • 4 days ago
Dave & Chuck the Freak ask listeners to share about when they realized they effed up. The stories include a man in Spanks, snorting Viagra, and a lady who pooped on a garbage can lid.

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Fun
Transcript
00:00when did you say well that's when i effed up that's we want to know on the rip lines 248-544-WRIF
00:17248-544-9743 toll free 1-855-9743-101 or texas 4WRIF 49743 voice changing as we head to anonymous
00:32first anonymous when did you say well that's when i effed up so i'm not a big guy but i've got i've got
00:39a gut and so i was at the department store because i needed a new suit for a wedding and i noticed they
00:45sold spanks for men which is basically just a super tight t-shirt yeah yeah to hold your gut in
00:51yeah and i i came up with the brilliant idea of well i'll try it on to see if it works
00:55and so i took it in the fitting room and that thing was so tight that i could i couldn't get
01:00it down past my nipples and the bad thing is is i couldn't it was locked into position i couldn't
01:06get it down any further i couldn't get it up and it was so tight it had my arms like locked my ears
01:11like straight up no oh my god no
01:14somebody help something's happened so that's when you effed up how what happened
01:22well i i panicked for a little bit and then i lucked out because there was the hook on the side
01:28of the door that you could use to you know hang stuff up on so i had to shimmy my way over there
01:34and kind of get the the the shirt stuck on the hook and then kind of like work my way down until
01:40it finally popped off he could have really done it spit you out yeah you know he took a real risk
01:49too by hooking himself yeah like that could have been the end right like that's where he could have
01:55been on the last day yeah i love that the panic set in yeah it would embarrassing as a dude trying
02:03on spanks in the first place that's got to be a highly embarrassing moment but then to get trapped
02:07in that spank shirt uh anonymous you're on with dave and chuck the freak what happened
02:11my wife was uh ready to crash i knew i had a small window of opportunity to get some loving
02:19and i had a little equipment problem and i remembered a buddy had given me a viagra to try
02:25but i didn't really think i had that much time so i crushed it up and made a couple lines and
02:31snorted it okay i uh it worked but my head swelled up about the size of a balloon for about a week and
02:39a half i'm sorry it gave your like head a boner it uh i couldn't see you're so smart and your head
02:47swelled up like a balloon so big you couldn't see yeah i i knew i screwed up i was like babe i got a
02:55problem i walked in with a massive boner but i could not see my head kind of swelled up i mean
03:04you could obviously see my cheeks my forehead everything so you about a week she said if you're
03:10not better by tomorrow i'm taking these emergency you let it go for a week with a swollen head
03:15oh yeah dude so did you think that snorting it snorting it would just make it
03:25faster i thought it would be quick you know i thought it would go instantly and work very quickly
03:31and it did it did but with a devastating side effect very balloon head did you go about your business
03:42like did you go to work no i couldn't i couldn't see you couldn't see for a week and you waited a
03:49week to go to the hospital i could i mean i could see but it was very blurry i had a headache i couldn't
03:54do anything i couldn't concentrate oh my lord oh lord dude that's crazy holy hell if balloon head
04:05persists for more than a week couldn't take your position anymore i snorted my anger got this balloon
04:09head for a week i can't see a damn thing i got a head boner you don't want a head boner no you don't
04:17so did his eyes just swell shut is that what it sounded like i think what he's it's almost like
04:21big trouble in little china oh like the electricity guy yeah when he decided to blow himself up he gets
04:28mad this one i know i effed up when i was young tomboy playing in the woods with my friends i had to
04:34go to the bathroom and didn't want to go home so i decided i just go in the woods i took a crap on a
04:40garbage can lid you know the old metal ones and found out real quick there was a yellow jacket nest
04:46underneath it oh god needless to say they swarmed out of their nest and stung me all over while my
04:53pants were at my knees i started running down the street toward my house with my pants and my ankles
04:58screaming my friend's dad came out and walked me the rest of the way home i was stung all over my
05:04legs butt and bits oh how embarrassing i can laugh about it now though and that's a lady that's a lady
05:11she was pooping on a garbage can that's what you get ladies that poop on garbage can lids may you be
05:17stung by a million bees you a million bees will sting your bits you dirty garbage can pooping lady
05:27it's very very biblical
05:29you know what happens when you poop on the can
05:36one million
05:39million bees it's friday
05:41bitches
05:42you
05:42you