GTA 5 Speedrun, but it's actually Family Feud

Metatube

CHECK OUT WANDERSTOP ITS GREAT: https://store.steampowered.com/app/1299460/Wanderstop/  Streaming live on Twitch! https://www.twitch.tv/dougdoug Full stream recording: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RKj3z_p6xc8  Edited by Keke! https://twitter.com/CozyKeke  Thumbnail Animation by Jeagle! https://www.youtube.com/c/Jeagle_g  My 2nd Channel: http://bit.ly/dougdoug2 Twitter: https://twitter.com/DougDougFood  More DugDug: Latest Uploads: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rp4cH7mb4X4&list=PLzTxt5iYdhziB3Zf03HR_aZWgJ49ffj-d&index=2 DougDoug Challenges: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLzTxt5iYdhzh_SW60_g3HPVjBupwUZOFA Popular Videos: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLzTxt5iYdhzgrLpm-SQNNAVOw0gVs8Iu_  Music Credits (in order of appearance):  Rez - Buggie Running Beeps Paper Mario: The Origami King - Peach’s Castle (Underground) DNF Duel - On The Sea Bayonetta - Splash Wave (Climax Mix) Bayonetta - Sexy Battle Bayonetta 2 - Shopping (B) Bayonetta 3 - Mission Complete Bayonetta 3 - Mission Start Astro Bot - Muteki Funk F-Zero GX - Osc-Sync Carnival (Lightning) Sly Cooper 2 - Episode Select Smash Bros. Melee - Corneria Gran Turismo 2 - Blue Line (Instrumental Version) Smash Bros. Ultimate - Snake Man Stage Bach - Cello Suite Sonic Rush - Jeh Jeh Rocket Smash Bros. Brawl - Snake Eater (Instrumental) Sonic Frontiers - Heart and Soul Super Mario Strikers - Main Menu Tekken 6 - High Roller’s Club (Splashing Casino) Driver San Francisco - Unnamed Track 13 F-Zero GX - Shotgun Kiss (Casino Palace) Gran Turismo 2 - Bonus Layton Brothers: Mystery Room - Track 6 (Conclusion) Pro Evolution Soccer 2008 - Triumphal Wind Super Mario Odyssey - The Odyssey’s First Takeoff Bully - Hattrick vs Galloway https://freesound.org/people/Sheyvan/sounds/475221/  About DougDoug: Doug is a sentient bell pepper who was hired by the FBI to crack gaming challenges and also talk about things with food  #DougDoug #gtav #familyfeud

Transcript

00:00Hey, my brother just came out with a new video game. It's called wander stop. It's out now

00:03You can get it on PC and Xbox and PlayStation, and I don't this isn't sponsored

00:07I don't make any money from this, but technically I got a free copy of the game from my brother

00:13Which is like $25 and so technically I have to disclose that and this is a hashtag ad

00:19But I'm not like pay. I don't make any money, but anyway here are three reasons

00:22Why I think you should try wander stop. I just beat it. It's really really good number one is the art

00:27Holy shit, this game is beautiful. God. It looks like a dr. Seuss mixed with a Miyazaki painting

00:32It's absolutely gorgeous hashtag number two the music it is all made by c418 the composer of Minecraft

00:39It's really really really good. It's a gigantic soundtrack. It's gorgeous the whole time

00:43I'm gonna listen to this all the time when I study from now on or do work or whatnot hashtag

00:47And third is the writing my brother did the writing for this and it's about running a tea shop, and it's really cozy

00:52But then also it's mixed with these really interesting narrative elements about like mental health and burnout

00:57It's a super cool mix if you liked the Stanley parable or the beginner's guide

01:00He did the writing for that and it's John so good. I'm biased

01:04Hashtag ad, but I just I love this style of writing. I recommend checking out water stops real good

01:08I just think you'd like it. That's all I just think it's freaking great. You should go check it out anyways

01:14Thanks so much on to the actual video

01:17Today, I'll be attempting the Trevor percent speedrun in GTA 5

01:21This is a speedrun to beat the first 13 missions of the game as fast as possible ending with the awesome jewelry store heist

01:28However, I'm also going to be playing family feud with twitch chat throughout this speedrun

01:33I'm going to be asking chat questions like what's the best kind of sandwich in bed?

01:37And then my program will read everything that they say in the chat and determine their top three answers

01:41I have to guess one of those top three answers

01:44And if I get it wrong that my GTA 5 mod will activate a random punishment in the game to ruin my speedrun

01:50So, let's find out how well I actually know my own twitch chat. Here we go. All right chat

01:54Here's your first question. If you could steal anything in real life without being caught

01:58What would you steal if you could steal anything in real life without being caught?

02:03What would you steal and while you guys are answering that I will be playing the fastest goddamn GTA 5 of my life

02:09Okay, what is your guess easy chat would steal the hope diamond

02:16I

02:24Don't steal private islands, you don't know us at all. I don't think you would steal an island cuz that's stupid

02:29That doesn't make any sense. Okay, so I press e and now okay, I get put into a

02:34Honestly, we could maybe recover

02:38Okay, fine follow-up question name something that you would sell your soul for but you could only have it for one hour

02:46What would you sell your soul for?

02:51Shit I actually really don't know, you know private island

02:57Survey says a million dollars an hour with my crush an hour-long orgasm

03:03Okay, our long orgasm is actually a great answer. Why would you want a million dollars for one hour though?

03:10Nobody said that it turns out that my code

03:13It's not actually reading twitch chat at all. It's just been making shit up. It's slandering them

03:18They probably hate orgasms

03:19Basically, the AI was like this fucking weirdo keeps asking me to summarize twitch chat and giving me nothing our long orgasm

03:27It's just fucking made shit up. I do appreciate that. It was like playing along. I was like sure buddy

03:31Oh, you're a big streamer. Aren't you buddy? Yeah sport. You got this. They're all saying orgasm

03:36All righty quick five-minute coding adventure to make the code actually read twitch chat

03:40And now ladies and gentlemen be stunned by the power of my dug-dug code. What is the greatest video game of all time?

03:48The answer is yakuza orgasm, that's correct

03:54Survey says orgasm simulator

03:57They did it and now we are ready to get back into the speedrun. It's only been like 15 minutes

04:02What's something you do in GTA 5 that you wish you could do in real life? That's a good one

04:08Learn all about you fucking weirdos

04:09I have a very strong guess at what this is and it's gonna confirm to me that you guys are all psychopaths if I'm correct

04:17Running old people over in cars. I have known the entire time. I've been streaming

04:28You can do number two and three in real life kind of a self-owned by the way, all right

04:32All right. Let's get a new one. What's the most embarrassing thing you've done in a public restroom and while that's happening

04:37I'll activate the random spawn

04:41Back in a helicopter, okay. What is your guess? I don't know give birth

04:49What

04:53Shit myself

04:55You guys can do that in other places. That's why it's embarrassing. Wait, is this the most embarrassing thing you have done?

05:02You've orgasm in a bathroom. You did hear the question was what you have done, right? Okay, let's get another question

05:08You getting in the game. Here we go. Oh shit. I'm talking

05:10Sorry, name a job that you would only take if you were forced at gunpoint next question beginning of the game ignore ignore that

05:18It's let's here we go. Oh shit

05:21We get these guys into the closet

05:24You

05:28What is your guess not to get political here, but I'm gonna say president

05:32I think most people would not want to be president. It sounds like a shitty job

05:37Survey says dreamer

05:41Soldier

05:43Okay. All right. Well spawn. All right

05:46So can I continue I don't actually know

05:51It's not letting me use the phone

05:54You have no thumbs

05:57Okay resetting it I turn into a chicken that is not good

06:01Okay. Now technically you're not supposed to have mods installed in a speedrun. That is illegal

06:07But my mod isn't actually helping me like it's making this whole thing a lot worse

06:11So I assume the speedrun moderators will be fine with this. Why did the chicken cross the road next question?

06:16Why did the chicken cross the road?

06:18I assume at least enough of you will say the generic obvious answer that that will be in the top three. Yeah. Oh fuck

06:27That was just straight up to get to the other side

06:34Survey says to get to the other side

06:38That is the life's journey of every chicken, okay new question ideally something that's not related to orgasms

06:43No, not favorite sex position. What is something that will not cause orgasm to be the answer favorite crime?

06:49What is your favorite crime to commit?

06:51You should probably put like a winky face at the end of your answer

06:54So the FBI doesn't think you've committed this crime, by the way

06:59I'm gonna say murder murdering people probably one of them will be orgasm. I'm sure

07:06Survey says

07:08tax evasion

07:11Orgasm is not a crime. Okay spawning angry farmers. Okay. Well, these guys are gonna try to kill me but actually have a gun

07:17So this doesn't stop the speedrun right now. That's fantastic. Okay, we keep moving tax evasion was obvious

07:22No, it's not what you're talking about. What would you do in a hostage situation? People will just answer orgasm. That's too

07:28Actually, I'll take that. That's easy. What would you do in a hostage situation? There's still farmers. God damn it

07:33If you answer orgasm, I'm just gonna get a freebie. That's not even hard next question

07:37I died, but I got to the checkpoint. There's still farmers. God damn it

07:42If you answer orgasm, I will I'm just going to what Oh server though. Fuck. There's still farmers. I

07:49Get to reset the farmers if I die

07:53I would obviously orgasm in a hostage situation. That's correct. Thank you. All right

07:59Is

08:03Orgasm yes people horrible

08:07Okay. All right. I have a good question name literally any word other than orgasm. This is gonna be a freebie

08:14Okay, once I get this question, right? I should be able to get to the next checkpoint, which is getting into the car

08:20My guess is orgasm

08:23Wait, really survey says no

08:29Twitch chat managed to not run the same joke into the ground repeatedly. I'm impressed you guys have evolved

08:35I just said sex instead. What is your favorite thing to type into twitch chat?

08:39I think there's a number of possible answers to this one. You might do orgasm. I think rigged would be an answer

08:46Okay, I believe the safest though is

08:50bald

08:52Wait, really survey says

08:54Rick

08:57You say bald every fucking 10 seconds, okay. Well, I activated a black hole, but I might still be able to beat the mission

09:04So we're fine

09:05Damn it

09:07So black hole every 10 seconds launches all nearby cars at me, but it's not like guaranteed to stop the mission or anything

09:13So I actually think we'll be okay

09:17Okay, watch out for the cows, yes, thank you. Sorry. What is the most embarrassing moment that's ever happened to you?

09:23Orgasming is not embarrassing. Well, I guess it depends if it is orgasm give details. Don't be shy chat. No, I forgot

09:29There's cows spawning still

09:32I don't know

09:33Their mom like pork to the high school principal and everybody made fun of them for it and orgasm

09:40fucking cow

09:43Sir

09:49Orgasm in every answer. We are saying it's orgasming and shitting yourself was more embarrassing than watching the stream though

09:53So it's good. You guessed two things. Well, I feel like the speedrun moderators will still allow it. We are rigging ourselves

09:59It's your fault that people keep saying orgasm now

10:02This might shock you guys but twitch chat has latched onto a joke way too much

10:07And so my new strategy is gonna be asking questions that are so fucked up

10:10They don't want to answer with orgasm chat. Give me a detailed breakdown of how you would kidnap a person's, baby

10:19Detailed breakdown to find you would kidnap a person's baby. Okay, I gotta take the helicopter back to the final part of the mission

10:25This is going great

10:28My god, you'd offer him candy, I think that's probably

10:31You guys are fucked up

10:37You guys are fucked up people what's the most incriminating question I can ask chat

10:42Star, what are your top 10 favorite porn stars?

10:46And I have to out yourself depending on if you can answer this question and how quickly you can answer it next question

10:52So we're just learning so much about you guys. What is your guess?

10:55I'm gonna guess that they didn't say porn stars and they said me dug dug. That's correct

11:01So predictable

11:06Can we ask about the trolley problem, that's a good idea, but there's only two answers no there isn't okay fine chat

11:12You were presented with the trolley problem

11:14A train track is hurtling towards five people on a track and you can pull a lever which will redirect the train and only hit

11:21One person. What do you do?

11:24What is your guess they would leave the train so that it kills the five people and then they would go run and

11:30Personally kill the last guy

11:33Really? I thought I would for sure get that survey says multi-track drifting trip to hit all

11:39Orgasm, okay, the fucked up questions aren't working either. So I'm just gonna ban the word orgasm. We refuse to be silenced

11:45I mean here we just get everybody banned say your favorite word in the chat. Somebody said pivot to organism

11:52Just say normal

11:55Shit I need to die so that I can reset with my car and not have it turned into a helicopter

12:03You know, it's probably still orgasm I actually want to

12:13Cue when was the last time you went on a date? That's a good one. All right chat be honest

12:18Don't be shy. You gotta tell us when is the last time you went on a date? All right admit it just admit it

12:25I

12:28Assume a lot of people said never so never that's got to be the most common every single other answer would be like too specific

12:34Of a time but never would be collectively answered. That's for sure. Correct, which means I'm gonna beat the mission

12:41And level number two is done

12:47So we have a mix of chatters who've never been on a date and chatters who are really cool

12:51That's good good to know if we want to get personal when was the last time you orgasm no

12:56Chat what crime would you commit that could never be committed again afterwards? That's a good one. You got to get creative

13:03Okay, skip through this cutscene. We get out of here

13:05I wait for the call from the car dealership guy and then we begin mission number three. What is your guess?

13:14Murder because you can't commit murder of a person twice, right?

13:18What survey says suicide perjury destroyer

13:24I wasn't thinking big enough. I was thinking too small. I was thinking about you murdering a human. That's my fault. Okay. Well, I have to spawn

13:32Angry farmers. Okay. Well if I get into my car fast enough, I should just be able to drive past them

13:38Excuse me

13:40Maybe what is your what's the best physical feature on me next question? What is your what is your best?

13:48What's the best physical feature on me? I just force you guys to give me compliments. This is great

13:54Or you're just gonna say bald and then I just guess bald and always get it right. What is your guess?

13:59It's probably bald. That's correct

14:03Survey says bald head

14:05bald

14:06eyes

14:07It's not different. You guys can't really see my eyes, but thank you

14:11All right

14:11I realized the strategy to beating the speedrun is to just give you guys the ability to say bald and you'll always say it is

14:17Doug bald I can just play the game normally doug bald. None of you can resist making this same joke over and over

14:24Okay, doug. What is your guess? They obviously said yes

14:30Survey says no

14:34I was bald in answer. Who is doug bald? What the fuck is wrong with the program?

14:39Got him. Hold on. What is the literal easiest question? What is two plus two? What is two plus two?

14:46Wait, no, no, you're gonna say 69. This is easy

14:48At first I was thinking I would answer four because enough people would feel dumb if they said the wrong answer

14:53And then I realized you'll just all say 69. Okay, doug. What is your guess?

14:5769. It's probably 69 420

15:01Really survey says five fish 21 you fucking with me, right?

15:13Fish genius

15:16Slam dude, you can't read us. I'm gonna be honest. I never would have read five fish and 21. All right, there's cows

15:23It's still world record pace. It's been

15:26An hour and 15 minutes. Who's the main character? Yeah. Okay. Wait, that's a good thing

15:30Who is the main character of the doug doug stream hint? It's twitch chat

15:34Who is the main character of the doug doug stream?

15:37I'm playing 5d chess because I know that you're gonna try to not say twitch chat

15:42But there's no obvious other answer that I wouldn't guess you might say part. Oh, you know what?

15:46You're probably gonna say chair. Okay, doug. What is your guess?

15:50I think you know that I would know that you would guess chair

15:53And so you're going to counteract that by actually giving the answer of not twitch chat because you think that's what I would answer

16:00So you're literally just gonna tell it not twitch chat. The answer is not twitch chat. That's correct. Let's go. Let's go beautiful

16:07survey says chair

16:09Parts are

16:10Rosa, I was technically correct. I guess I can just say what the answers aren't it's kind of cheating scammed and rigged

16:16What's your least favorite thing about my streams? Be honest. This might be hard. Okay, doug. What is your guess?

16:25Repetitive jokes

16:27Really I thought for sure you guys survey says doug

16:31you

16:33Oh, all right, cool, of course, yeah, I guess that's fair saying it's me is your least favorite part that works. All right

16:39Uh activating black hole. Actually, that might be a problem doug. Please ask us as we are

16:43Okay, apparently we decided suicide was a top answer for something. Yeah, that's a good point. Hey chat. You guys doing okay?

16:51I'm doing great

16:55I'm doing great right now

16:58Okay, doug, what is your guess I think chat is just struggling with the state of the world right now

17:02There's just a lot going on with politics with world events with the economy

17:06It just feels like things aren't necessarily going up in a great direction

17:10That our leaders aren't doing a great job

17:12And that it's hard not to look at the state of the world and just feel a little overwhelmed

17:16And so they're struggling a bit right now

17:19incorrect

17:21Survey says no

17:23Fish bold, right? Okay

17:26um

17:27so

17:28Literally say anything chat literally say anything chat. This is an absolute fucking bait. I will take a freebie where I can get it

17:35Okay, doug. What is your guess fish?

17:38incorrect

17:40Okay, survey says anything that's actually fine

17:43naked grandma

17:46How do you coordinate on naked grandma

17:49It's like you don't even know us. I just want to be clear at no point ever has naked grandma as a phrase

17:56Been relevant naked grandmas are always relevant. It was on actual family feud. Oh doug doesn't know about the naked

18:02I don't watch family feud. Also gta might be uh crashing. Okay, this is taking forever

18:07Uh, i've beaten three missions and the game just crashed

18:10So i'm just gonna go ahead and do a classic speedrun strategy of cheating because you can technically just manually skip ahead to later

18:16Missions in the game. Obviously, this is not normally allowed

18:19But as long as the speedrun moderators don't look at this particular part of the speedrun

18:22I doubt they'll notice. Uh, I do need to reset the timer though. It seems to be frozen

18:27Oh

18:29Okay, it accidentally reset. Nobody tell the moderators about that speedrun moderators. This guy is cheating

18:35Whoa, whoa. No, no, no closed the game

18:37He's just picking the play the baba caboose song throughout this run. He needs to be banned from submitting

18:43Shh

18:48All right, cool we're good there's no proof i've been cheating in the speedrun the jewel store job

18:52Okay, this is the last mission. Can I get a poggies in the chat? Can I get a pog?

18:57Whoa world record pace. We're already on the final mission. Oh my god, you guys this could be it world record

19:03Wait, hold on. He's literally talking about breaking into a jewelry store

19:06Okay, all right. You're literally about to do a jewelry heist

19:09Do you go loud in the front door or go smart and you play it stealthily to avoid any combat decisions decisions

19:17I will go off of your guys's suggestion here. What is your guess?

19:20I would assume you go in loud and dumb while peeing or something. That's correct

19:26Okay loud and dumb survey says loud

19:30Get naked

19:32Yes, good. Why is he shirtless?

19:34He got naked

19:37All right chat, what are you gonna do if you get pinched during the heist just as a reminder in this theoretical robbery

19:43We're doing you are already naked and crying, but i'll take a freebie. I'll take a free answer of saying cry. Okay

19:49What is your guess? Obviously, they're gonna cry they get pinched by the cops. They start sobbing probably get naked. That's correct

19:56Survey says cry

20:00Snitch

20:01You would snitch I would never commit a crime with you guys. I just want you to know that

20:04I will literally never go on a heist with any of you. Oh, I have a good question

20:08If you're going to rob a jewelry store, which role are you taking? Are you the getaway driver? Are you the muscle?

20:14Are you the hacker? Are you the security? Are you the brains of the operation like lester? What is your role here?

20:20Next question. Give me a freebie with cry. What is your guess?

20:24I I assume that a bunch of you said crying. Oh, I know. I know nudist

20:29incorrect

20:31Really what did you survey says the pisser

20:36The pisser is not a role, okay, whatever I got cows we can still do the heist with cows

20:40How much money would it take for you to be offered by the police before you rat your crew out?

20:45I'm, assuming it's like one dollar or do you have any standard? Maybe it's like you need 50 bucks

20:50Uh, all right. This is eddie. Oh, excuse me. Sorry. Okay, doug. What is your guess?

20:57$69 it's not because I think that number is funny. It's just like you

21:01You think that number is funny surveys is zero slash free one dollar 50 gifted subs

21:07So if the police

21:09offered you 50

21:13Okay, well it spawned ramps, but I maybe can still actually duel the heist. All right, we're good

21:18Gift the sub. No, i'm i'm not paying you to rat out the group. I don't have to get this up

21:23I have to get the money or whatever

21:26Oh pressing e spawns things

21:31Oh, no the chicken the button to take jewelry activates my mod, um

21:39This is fine. Okay, chat. You turn into a chicken during the heist. What do you do? Give me some guidance here, please

21:45Okay, chat, you turn into a chicken during the weather explosions. Wait, can I still steal? What do you do?

21:51Oh, no, I just turn into a chicken again. I have to change the mod. I can't take jewelry. Okay, doug

21:56What is your guess probably lay an egg into the jewelry case, that's correct

22:01What?

22:02Survey says lay it in. Okay cross the road clock. Well, I got that question, right?

22:08But i'm a chicken so I have to reset it. Anyways, it's pointless. Oh and now in a helicopter

22:13This is the worst

22:15Jewelry store heist i've ever seen

22:18I can't believe I get to say I was here when duke dug got the wi

22:23Well, uh, you say that now but the the heist is taking a little bit longer than I hoped that's fine

22:27This is all part of the speedrun as long as the speedrun moderators

22:30Don't look at this particular part of the video

22:32It will probably look legit still the world record for the speedrun is 53 minutes

22:38well

22:39Chat between you and me

22:41Nobody tell them about this

22:46Okay, just saved a lot of time this is why our date is failing right I forgot we're on a date

22:51That explains why you keep getting naked all these other gta 5 speedrunners are dumb

22:56Looks like loading the missions is way faster than 52 minutes

22:59Why has nobody considered this strategy before doug? This is the speedrun moderator. Feel free to reset the timer again

23:06Okay, good. Yeah, let's get one more

23:09There we go. Cool. Does anybody know if you have to actually run the timer?

23:15Okay, we got everything the jewelry is stolen we're now running away from the store

23:19What's the best way to get rid of the cops next question?

23:22Okay, if I can get this one, correct, this is the last sequence in the whole speedrun

23:26We have to get into the tunnels. We have to go through the river actually getting decently close

23:29I assume you're just gonna say what we actually do. What is your guess drop off the bridge so we can head down into the tunnels

23:38Survey says

23:44We're activating black hole that means all the vehicles are going to shoot at me

23:47But I can actually still beat the mission this date sucks. What's been your favorite part of this date so far chat?

23:54Mine was stealing all the jewels. Okay, doug. What is your guess?

23:58Crying they liked crying which indicates it's not a very good date, but that's correct

24:03Okay

24:04Survey says

24:08Okay, and then we get out here lester's waiting for us at the lockup and that means

24:12We're nearly at the end of the speedrun chat what words of encouragement and celebration should I give to the crew notice?

24:18I said words words not actions words. What do I say? Give me a motivational speech something to really

24:25Celebrate everything that we've been through our accomplishment with this jewelry heist make it climactic. This is the end of the speedrun

24:32This is the last thing the speedrun moderators are going to see. Okay, doug. What is your guess?

24:37All right crew we cried we almost died but at the end of the day, this is so loud

24:42We've got a lot of pie to split amongst ourselves. Great job team

24:48Incorrect, what did you say survey says

24:53Rigged get 50 subs

24:56Uh, well everybody is invisible

25:00But I think we actually can still complete this

25:03Oh, right. They're all

25:05Okay, whatever I did it. Hold on get ready with the time keep our heads down

25:09What I thought you can still see his walking cane. All right, look everybody take off the crew was never here

25:14You're insane. No, I did it. I did rob the store. Trust me you guys and

25:20time

25:2110 minutes 35 seconds and that's how I beat the world record for the trevor percent speedrun by almost 45 minutes

25:29Cops twitch chat's right there, sir. They're right there. You can arrest them, sir. Those are the criminals, right?

25:34They've been peeing on everybody. All right, great. I'm off to go submit this totally legit speedrun. But uh, by the way youtube viewers

25:42We're cool, right?

25:43You guys aren't gonna snitch to the mods, right?

25:45You know what tell you what as long as you guys don't tell anybody I cheated

25:50I will heart every single comment on this youtube video. You'll look famous in the comments

25:55You can tell all your friends you got heart from doug doug. Wow. All you gotta do is not snitch

26:01Okay

26:03All right

26:04Glad we came to this understanding

26:06Oh, I fucking got you so hard

26:09What holy shit what the fuck did you snitch

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