Gogglebox Australia - Season 21 Episode 2,
Gogglebox.Au.S21E02,
Gogglebox.Au.S21E02,
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00Hi-ya!
00:01Oh, my God.
00:02And not near the TV.
00:03Where did they come from?
00:04I didn't buy them lightsabers.
00:05Leon.
00:06Leon?
00:07Don't even look at the TV with that thing.
00:08Phantom Menace away!
00:09TV, not the TV!
00:10TV, not the TV!
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01:56We are at the zenith of television.
01:57Intense conversations, not much face movement, a lot of choosies.
02:01I just love seeing rich people attack each other.
02:04As good as television gets.
02:07Friends are like diamonds.
02:09Just watch out for the fakes.
02:11I love these entries.
02:13My skirts may be short, but I'm not short of an opinion.
02:17Did I nail it?
02:18Yeah, that's pretty good.
02:19What would your saying be?
02:20My name's Kevin, and don't come for me unless I send for you.
02:25You've really thought about this, haven't you?
02:27That's in his LinkedIn file.
02:30What do you need on your CV to be a housewife?
02:33That's an easy one.
02:34Money.
02:35Take, for example, Victoria, who's absolutely ballin'.
02:38I've been doing a lot of busy and important things, like skiing, show jumping, hanging
02:43out with friends and family.
02:44You know what she didn't say, Milo?
02:46Working.
02:47So I'm definitely thinking the white bag, as we just discussed.
02:51I like the matchy look for today.
02:53Are they talking to each other of richness on balconies?
02:56Yeah, I'm allergic to that type of wealth as well.
03:00Martijn!
03:01Who's that?
03:02I think she's new.
03:03I've never seen her before.
03:05I have a beautiful marriage that I consider a great achievement.
03:08I want to see her husband.
03:10Is he 98?
03:11This would be a good spot to dig a sandcastle.
03:12Oh, is that her grandad?
03:13That's nice.
03:14She's, like, full family orientated.
03:15Can you believe we met 10 years ago?
03:16Wait, is that her husband?
03:17He needs his special time.
03:18No, he doesn't need his special time.
03:19He's about 100.
03:20Is she his nurse?
03:21I would describe myself as self-made.
03:23Oh my God!
03:24That's not what self-made means!
03:25To be fair, dealing with the elderly is tough.
03:26She's like an old Ariana Grande.
03:27So what's the number one thing?
03:28It's Mr Burns dressed up.
03:29Yeah, Jarrod!
03:30Yeah.
03:31It was a big deal.
03:32It was a big deal.
03:33It was a big deal.
03:34It was not a big deal.
03:35But it was a big deal.
03:36It was a big deal.
03:37It was a big deal.
03:38It was a big deal.
03:39I'm not going to lie.
03:40I was at a party.
03:41I was at a party.
03:42I was at a party.
03:43I was at a party.
03:44I was at a party.
03:45I mean, Mr. Burns dressed up.
03:46Yeah, Jarrod.
03:48Yeah, Mr. Burns.
03:50Mr. Burns with a wig.
03:51So tell me how you are.
03:53Because I was actually really worried about you.
03:55They're not going to eat those chips.
03:56In my head, it was pretty touch and go for a while.
03:59There's no way they're going to eat those chips.
04:00Let's see if they're still full when they leave.
04:03My main focus right now are probably going to be.
04:05Tell you what they've really nailed on the Real Housewives,
04:07collars.
04:08Look at the collars on these two.
04:09Wait till you see flashback collar.
04:12Wow.
04:13What?
04:14She looks like she's from Mortal Kombat.
04:15She came at me so hard at that reunion.
04:17She lit that match.
04:19It's hard to know who's hating who.
04:21Usually, it's safe to say everyone and everyone.
04:24Chips are still full.
04:25Chips are still full, yeah.
04:26But in this particular episode, it's
04:28yellow collar who hates the one over here on the left, who's
04:31not wearing a collar at all.
04:33She's got her floaties on.
04:34I will say something.
04:36What?
04:37She has a great set of.
04:38Hey, hey, hey, she's old enough to be your mother.
04:41Did your mum look like this at 52?
04:43No.
04:43How do you know?
04:44Yeah.
04:45Should I show you a photo of my mother at your age, mate?
04:48Don't speak for everyone else.
04:50Let her fall.
04:51Let her fall.
04:52Ah, bugger.
04:53She's going to fall off and fell out.
04:54Yeah.
04:55So I was a little bit nervous I was going to fall and die.
04:58Anyway, don't you want to know what they're fighting about?
05:01No.
05:01Too bad.
05:02The big scandal is.
05:03Chips are still full.
05:04No.
05:05I just blocked her, and then she blocked me on Instagram.
05:08Uh-oh.
05:09Uh-oh.
05:10She blocked me, and I followed me on Instagram.
05:14No way.
05:14When you've got 50-year-old women complaining
05:17about Instagram, you maybe got to take
05:19a good look in the mirror.
05:20They don't need any more encouragement
05:22to look in the mirror.
05:23Very good point there.
05:25Traditionally, a Housewives episode
05:27will end with them all getting together and pretending
05:30to like each other until the cocktails kick in.
05:32You look gorgeous.
05:33My friend's so gorgeous.
05:35Oh, yes, you look amazing.
05:36You look amazing.
05:37No, son, son.
05:39I can't stand you, you bitch.
05:41They're all amazing now.
05:42Later on, they're bitches.
05:43No!
05:44Oh.
05:45Sip, sip.
05:46Prepare for liftoff.
05:47You blocked me, Caroline.
05:49You blocked me.
05:50No, I didn't.
05:51Who blocked who?
05:52Oh, I know.
05:53Women hold onto stuff.
05:54You did it on Instagram.
05:55You blocked me.
05:56I didn't even know how to block you.
05:57Oh, shut up.
05:59I came to see if all of the drama can be parked.
06:03No.
06:05No, that's why we're here.
06:06Tell me again how you didn't block me.
06:09Oh.
06:09Oh.
06:10Here we go, here we go.
06:11I can't watch it.
06:13You blocked me on Instagram.
06:14Oh, my God.
06:16I need a Valium.
06:17I'm sure they've got heaps.
06:18You're jealous of the fact that you get most of your money
06:21from your ex-husband.
06:22Oh.
06:25Rib shot.
06:26You're actually disgusting.
06:28I think we need to walk out.
06:29I'm walking out.
06:30Yay.
06:30Good on you.
06:31I'm walking out.
06:32And I never want to be around her ever again.
06:34And you never will.
06:35End of story.
06:37Until next week.
06:38Next time.
06:39Whoa.
06:41I mean, I feel like a much worse person,
06:43but I kind of want to watch the next episode now.
06:56In Melbourne, Tim has a big problem
06:59with his Mardi Gras costume.
07:01It's not looking gay enough.
07:04This week on Hey You.
07:05I'm on my dick.
07:06I bloody love Below Deck.
07:07Like, I live for the drama.
07:09Oh, we're down under too, aren't we?
07:12Are we?
07:12No, isn't that what the Below the Deck is?
07:13It is down under.
07:15No, Below Deck is a show about people who work on a yacht.
07:19Yeah, like down under on the yacht.
07:20No, like on a yacht.
07:22Like, it's American.
07:23Like, but yeah, but you're under.
07:25And on top.
07:26No, no, down under,
07:27as in it's an Australian spinoff with an Aussie captain.
07:30It's about people who are down under on the boat.
07:32Why is this so hard for you to grasp?
07:35Nevermind that.
07:36So what part of down under are they sailing?
07:38The seashells?
07:40Where the hell's that?
07:40I don't know, near the seashore.
07:42Seashells.
07:43Seashells.
07:44By the seashore.
07:45Is this a real place?
07:46East of Africa, do you say?
07:47Yeah, of course it's a real place.
07:49Aren't we down under?
07:50No, we're in the seashells.
07:51Not the seashells.
07:52Oh yeah.
07:53The seashells.
07:53They're known for their shells.
07:55No, they're not.
07:56That's why it's called seashells.
07:57No, it isn't.
07:58You see, the seashell in the seashells sees no seashells
08:02since they sail from the seashore.
08:04So any seashells shell sellers
08:06surely shouldn't sell shells on the show's ship.
08:08Wow.
08:09I would love to go on this boat.
08:11It's a ship, Matt.
08:12There's a piano.
08:14That is a big boat.
08:16It's a ship.
08:17That's a boat.
08:18Ship.
08:19Oh, you feel so happy being on a boat.
08:20It's a ship.
08:22He's giving me the chips, I tell you what.
08:25Ship off.
08:26Seriously?
08:26No, you just don't understand how annoying it is.
08:28It is a big exotic boat.
08:30Matthew, it is a ship.
08:32Mom, you met one person that told you
08:34it was a ship, not a boat.
08:35I work in the tourism industry.
08:37The boat, ship, sorry,
08:39has several deckhands in the crew.
08:40One of whom is from Athens, Greece.
08:43Oh, no.
08:44Bravo, Yanaki.
08:46I'm super competitive with pretty much anything I do.
08:49Better than you?
08:50One day I'll definitely be better than everyone.
08:52He's a confident Greek man.
08:54What a shock.
08:54What's your position?
08:55I'm a lead deckhand.
08:56He's the lead deckhand.
08:58The Greek is the lead deckhand.
08:59At this very moment,
09:00I'm not gonna run with any lead deckhands.
09:02Ha ha ha!
09:03It's always the Greek that assumes the role
09:05that it's not his.
09:06I came here to be a lead deckhand.
09:08More like lead dickhead, if you know what I mean, eh?
09:10All right, don't be nasty.
09:12Yeah!
09:14The guests on board whatever this is.
09:16This is a ship.
09:17Will be expecting the kitchen to serve up some fine dining.
09:20Oh, no.
09:21Oh, God, that's horrible.
09:23What is it?
09:23Proper weevils and maggots.
09:25Oh, ew!
09:26No.
09:27Oh!
09:28Oh, no.
09:29Oh!
09:31Oh, that's awful.
09:32Ah!
09:33Yuck!
09:34I have to chuck everything away and throw everything out.
09:36Oh, no, that's salvageable.
09:38Yeah, definitely.
09:39Yeah, pasta, man.
09:40It's sweet.
09:41Use that for your entree.
09:43There's been an alarming discovery upstairs as well.
09:46Deck crew, deck crew.
09:47As the stewardesses have been asked
09:49to unpack the guests' luggage.
09:51There's some things I don't really know where to put.
09:54Do they have to unpack for the guests?
09:56Yes, unpack everything.
09:59Oh.
10:00What is it?
10:00Oh, look, it's...
10:02Oh, actually, come to think of it,
10:03I have no idea what that is.
10:04Are they?
10:05Yep.
10:06Oh!
10:07Oh, hello.
10:08I have never seen these things before in my life.
10:10Where do you put that, Dad?
10:12Holly, this is a conversation
10:13that I didn't think we'd ever have
10:14in the history of the world,
10:15and I'm not gonna start going into it now.
10:17He puts it on his towel.
10:18That's for your...
10:19Wear.
10:20Then it goes up your...
10:21Ouch.
10:22No, that goes around your...
10:23Poster.
10:24And the balls goes up...
10:25Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
10:26Probably need some gloves to handle those ones.
10:27Well, another place you need gloves is in the kitchen.
10:30For what I've said in that kitchen,
10:31I wouldn't need anything.
10:32The starter is a gazpacho.
10:35What is that?
10:36A soup?
10:37It's a corn soup.
10:38Ugh.
10:39That sounds shit.
10:40It's very saucy.
10:42Oh, yum!
10:43That's another...
10:44That's another soup.
10:45Tonkai gai.
10:45If it looks like soup, it's...
10:46Three soups in a row.
10:48There's a lemongrass broth.
10:49Don't you reckon that's too much of fluid?
10:51Would the world be any worse if that boat just sank?
10:54It's a ship!
10:55Next on Blow Deck Down Under.
10:58I bloody love Blow Deck.
10:59Having watched this show,
11:01why would anyone go on one of these boats?
11:04It's a ship.
11:05I believe you're right.
11:06I just don't believe we care.
11:08I don't believe she's right.
11:21In Melbourne, Keith's figured out
11:23how to use his new stubby holder.
11:25Put that in my skyrocket so you don't...
11:27No, because then it'll go in the washing machine.
11:29Well, I'll leave it there so I don't forget it.
11:30No, because then you'll get up and it'll fall on the floor.
11:33I am standing on $5 million of real money.
11:37$5 million?!
11:39Yeah.
11:40Welcome to Beast Games.
11:42This week, we watched Beast Games,
11:45Prime's new supersized reality game show.
11:48Oh, it's Mr. Beast.
11:49I'm Mr. Beast,
11:50and what you're about to see will blow your mind.
11:53Mr. Beast is a global phenomenon.
11:56He's the most followed person on YouTube.
11:59And now he has his own game show.
12:01Competing for this $5 million
12:04are these 1,000 contestants!
12:071,000 contestants.
12:09And all 1,000 contestants
12:11are vying for a spot to get to Beast City.
12:14Keep your eyes open for a bargain.
12:17Beast City!
12:19But before any of that happens...
12:21We're gonna give away $1 million
12:23before we even play the first game.
12:25They're giving away $1 million in this episode?
12:28OK! Here we go!
12:30You will have to make a decision.
12:32Stay in the game or press the button on your tablet
12:35and eliminate yourself.
12:37Is this Amazon's answer to Squid Games?
12:40Yes. But not the shooting part.
12:42Those of you that eliminate yourselves
12:44will evenly split this $1 million.
12:47So if one person quits, they get the full million?
12:50Correct.
12:51What?!
12:53Oh, I would quit instantly.
12:56No, I think I would stay.
12:57Can I phone a friend?
12:58Oh!
12:59Oh, we got one!
13:01Oh, this guy's gone already.
13:02OK, at this point, he's a millionaire.
13:04Oh, someone else hit it!
13:05Now you're only at $500,000.
13:07The more people that skip out, the less money you're gonna get.
13:10Hit it! Hit the button!
13:12I'd take 40 grand for doing nothing, wearing a track suit.
13:14You each just won a little under $20,000!
13:18Look at that!
13:19Thanks, Mr Beast.
13:20Are there people out there who are like,
13:21Who's Mr Beast?
13:22Surely not.
13:23Who is Mr Beast?
13:25Is he some sort of Bitcoin guy?
13:27In order for your team to move on,
13:30someone must sacrifice themselves.
13:32Oh!
13:33One person from each row has to sacrifice themselves,
13:36go home with nothing.
13:38I would never sacrifice myself for anyone.
13:40The last three rows to eliminate someone
13:42will all be eliminated together.
13:44Would you sacrifice yourself?
13:46No. Sometimes richness is about the people you're with.
13:48Correct.
13:49I consider myself poor.
13:51I did it!
13:52Oh, she's eliminated herself.
13:53Isn't that nice?
13:54Find her in a coffee shop and give her a hug.
13:56And with that, it's time to eliminate some contestants.
14:00SCREAMS
14:02Oh!
14:03Where the hell did she go?
14:04SCREAMS
14:05Oh, my God!
14:06Oh, my God!
14:07It's like human dominoes.
14:09Who signed off the risk assessment for this?
14:11I just want them to drop the whole row at once now.
14:13SCREAMS
14:14Oh!
14:15Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
14:16This is the best exit on a reality TV show ever.
14:19This should be how we choose our politicians.
14:21So, he does YouTube online games?
14:24Or...
14:26..is he some sort of inventor?
14:28Oh, God.
14:29Let's just move on to the best bit of the app.
14:31Whoever remains after this next challenge
14:34will officially move into our city!
14:37So, if you make the city, that's a big deal.
14:39Big city!
14:40They'll be fighting for their spot on helicopters!
14:43What?!
14:44There's monster trucks!
14:45Jesus!
14:46They'll also be on a real pirate ship!
14:48What the hell?
14:49This is blowing my mind a little bit.
14:52What would you do with $5 million?
14:54I'm gonna be sitting here with you, Mum.
14:55I will be offering bribes...
14:57Bribes!
14:58..and whichever person accepts it
15:00will eliminate themselves and their rows.
15:03Oh! And their row?
15:04Wow, this is huge, Millie!
15:06Yeah. Is this viral?
15:08The bribes will keep going up,
15:10and we will keep eliminating rows.
15:12Alright, what's the first bribe?
15:13I have $20,000 up here.
15:1520 grand is not worth it.
15:18I'm ready to go, citizen-y.
15:19I'm ready to go.
15:20Oh, no, I want to press the button.
15:21I don't want to go with these idiots.
15:23Well, alright, how about $50,000?
15:2550 grand.
15:2650K, I'm out!
15:27You'd absolutely take 50K.
15:29No, 50's still not enough.
15:30My final offer, $100,000!
15:35$100,000?!
15:37I would take it.
15:38I am pressing.
15:39Bank, bank, bank, bank!
15:40We can trust each other, right?
15:42Nah, I don't trust a guy in a beanie.
15:44Never trust a guy in a beanie.
15:45We good.
15:47I'm not even going to look at it.
15:48He's going to take the bribe.
15:49He's going to take it.
15:50He's taking it.
15:51Take it.
15:52Woo!
15:53Just 100 grand.
15:54I told you, never trust a guy in a fricking beanie.
15:57$100,000.
15:58Let's go, baby.
15:59100 grand, you're a smart man.
16:01My heart is like, oh.
16:02Yeah, well, that's the wine.
16:03We've already given away over $2 million, breaking the world record.
16:11They've given away $2 million and knocked out 500 people in it's been one episode.
16:16Are you not entertained?
16:19I don't think I can go back to Sail of a Century after that.
16:22Oh my gosh.
16:25That is one of the best shows I've ever watched.
16:27That is so good.
16:28Amazing.
16:29How cool is that?
16:30I reckon it's one of the greatest shows I've ever seen in my life.
16:34Mr. Beast, okay?
16:46Do you want to trust fall to daddy?
16:56Oh my god.
16:57I want to do it.
16:58All right, Malik, your turn.
16:59Trust fall.
17:00Trust fall from Malik.
17:01Trust fall.
17:02Oh my god.
17:03Wednesday nights.
17:04Oh, hey, Mal.
17:05Oh, yes.
17:06You're very sweet.
17:07You ready to go home soon?
17:08You know what this is, eh?
17:09Oh!
17:10Oh!
17:11Oh!
17:12Oh!
17:13Oh!
17:14Oh!
17:15Oh!
17:16The Dog House Australia!
17:19Yep, Channel 10's Doggy Adoption Series is back.
17:23Loving people get to meet dogs who need loving families.
17:26Beautiful.
17:27You ready for a bit of this?
17:28Bing.
17:29Bing.
17:30They're your heart strings, mate.
17:33And first up to find the rescue dog of her dreams is Lizzie.
17:36I spent every school holiday from about year two up until year ten in hospital.
17:41Wow, that's awful.
17:42Poor kid.
17:43Then at 16, Lizzie was told she needed new lungs.
17:46It's either you do this and you possibly get another ten years, or you die in a couple
17:50years.
17:51Jesus.
17:52Imagine being told that.
17:53I decided on that day I wasn't going to go through with the transplant.
17:57Oh!
17:58And I told my parents how I wanted my funeral to be, what colour everyone was wearing.
18:01I picked out flowers.
18:02I planned the whole funeral.
18:03Wow.
18:04That is so sad.
18:0516, planning your funeral.
18:07But then she was given a new life-saving drug.
18:10The day after I started it, I went for my first run.
18:13I ran along the beach, and I could run, and I could skip, and I could dance without coughing
18:18or feeling like I couldn't breathe anymore.
18:20Wow, that's amazing.
18:21They really need to pick an extremely loving dog for her.
18:25Yes.
18:26Oh, how cute is it?
18:27Flower!
18:28Yeah, doggy!
18:29Hi, puppy.
18:30This here is Thistle.
18:31Hi, Thistle.
18:32Oh, Thistle.
18:33You'd hate to have a lisp.
18:34Hello, Thistle.
18:35Fiffle, fiffle, fiffle.
18:36Very nervous.
18:37It's OK, Thistle.
18:38Oh no, Thistle's sketched as.
18:39Aww.
18:40Aww.
18:41Aww, buddy.
18:42Aww, he's scared.
18:43Give him some food.
18:44Oh, oh, Thistle's getting a little more confidence.
18:45Come on, Thistle, come on.
18:46Oh, that's lovely.
18:47He's so excited.
18:48Aww.
18:49Aww, aww, aww.
18:50Oh, he's so happy.
18:51Aww.
18:52Aww.
18:53Aww.
18:54Aww.
18:55Aww.
18:56Aww.
18:57Aww.
18:58Aww.
18:59Aww.
19:00Aww.
19:01Aww.
19:02Aww.
19:03Aww.
19:04Aww.
19:05Oh, come on.
19:11Yay.
19:12Yeah.
19:13Oh, there we go.
19:15Hi, buddy.
19:17Aww.
19:20That's why I give you love.
19:21I think we've made a connection.
19:23Well, let's see if that connection
19:25means Thistle has found a new home.
19:27Since when do you have women on your fish?
19:29Dog or no dog?
19:30No dog.
19:31Different dog.
19:32This was under the table on a leaf.
19:34Ducky, come here.
19:35There you go, babes.
19:36I told you the little bastard was under the table.
19:38We ended up renaming him Tucker.
19:40Tucker.
19:41Under the table, having a bit of Tucker.
19:43After what she's gone through, it's lovely.
19:46It is lovely, isn't it?
19:48Next, we meet Anna and Anthony,
19:50who have been together for nine years.
19:52I was like, there's no children before dog.
19:55It's like dog and then kids.
19:56We've got a troll baby on our hands right now.
19:58That's what we did.
19:59Oh, how cute.
20:02Mate, wait until you see the dog.
20:04This is the house.
20:05This is where we used to film The Living Room.
20:11Hey, guys.
20:11What?
20:12Big pup.
20:13It's a wolf.
20:15So cute.
20:17This is Commando.
20:18Oh my God, Commando.
20:20He is divine.
20:24Oh, he loves them already.
20:28I don't think she's comfortable with such a large dog.
20:30Commando, sit.
20:32Sit.
20:35Don't.
20:36Not yet.
20:37No, he doesn't.
20:38Not yet.
20:39We've annoyed him.
20:39You've annoyed him now.
20:40I'm fearful that he's going to double in size
20:43because he's six months.
20:44He's absolutely going to double in size.
20:46What about if we brought his sister in,
20:49Alexis, who is much smaller?
20:51Yes.
20:56She's a lot smaller, isn't she?
20:57She's really cute too, isn't she?
20:58Oh, she's going to kill it.
21:01Good girl.
21:02Hi.
21:03Oh.
21:04I think she's sold.
21:06Yeah, she wants Alexis.
21:07Commando or Alexis?
21:09It's got to be Commando.
21:11Alexis.
21:12Alexis.
21:12Oh.
21:14Get both.
21:15And that way, if you split up, you can take a dog each.
21:18Always forward planning, Kevin.
21:19Always future thinking.
21:20We were very happy to take either of those dogs home.
21:23They're going to take both.
21:24We decided to bring Alexis home.
21:26Oh.
21:27And we changed her name to Winnie.
21:29What?
21:30Winnie?
21:31Alexis was the winner.
21:33Yeah, because that's who she wanted.
21:34Yep.
21:35Commando was going to go to the right home,
21:37and I think Winnie has come to the right home.
21:39Happy wife, happy life.
21:42Next time on The Dog House.
21:43Such a feel-good show, isn't it?
21:45I love seeing people get paired with the perfect dog.
21:49Never ceases to just not pull the little bit.
21:52Bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing.
22:02Um, Jarrod, I think there's two flies in your wine.
22:07Yes.
22:08Oh!
22:08Erp.
22:09You can't drink it now, can you?
22:10You're not.
22:11Can you drink it now, Jarrod?
22:12No.
22:13I spent good money on this wine.
22:14You're not.
22:16Erp.
22:17Jarrod.
22:18You stay away from that.
22:19Stay away from Uncle Jarrod.
22:20You hungry, bub?
22:21You want a snack?
22:22This week on Foxtel,
22:24we checked in for another season of...
22:26The Dog House.
22:27This week on Foxtel,
22:29we checked in for another season of...
22:31Oh, White Lotus.
22:33This is season three.
22:37Under control.
22:38Oh my God, I'm so happy this is back.
22:40I've been dying for season three.
22:42Yeah, same.
22:43And this time round,
22:44the show is set at the White Lotus, Thailand.
22:47What does White Lotus mean?
22:48White Lotus is a fancy five-star hotel
22:50and someone gets killed in the first episode
22:52and then we spend the whole show
22:55finding out who did the murder.
22:56It's like a Columbus mystery.
22:57Uh, yeah, sure.
22:59How do you find Thailand?
23:00I grew up in Hawaii.
23:01It's actually really similar.
23:03It always starts off nice and calm
23:05and everyone's happy and then...
23:08Oh!
23:09Jeez!
23:10There's always a murder.
23:12My mum's out there.
23:13My mum's out there.
23:14Maybe it's his mum that's killed.
23:16Yep, floating dead body.
23:17That's always how we start a White Lotus.
23:19This is not selling Thailand to me.
23:23Okay, and now we go back
23:26We're meeting the suspects.
23:27Let's call them guests for now.
23:29What sort of people book into the White Lotus, Mil?
23:31The people that don't read reviews, obviously.
23:34There's the older guy, younger girl couple combo.
23:37Sawadee ka.
23:38Sawadee ka.
23:40Nothing says tourist like learning the word hello
23:42and nothing else.
23:43Sawadee ka.
23:44There's the three childhood friends group catch up.
23:47This is Kate and Laurie
23:48and we have been friends since forever.
23:50Girl trip!
23:52When was your last girlfriend holiday?
23:55With Lorena and Pina when we went to Ballarat.
23:57There's also a familiar face to the White Lotus.
24:00And I'm just so glad all this worked out.
24:02Oh!
24:04Love Belinda.
24:05Belinda was in season one.
24:06She was the masseuse.
24:07And then finally, there's that family.
24:09Here's the Daltons.
24:10Here come the Daltons.
24:12There's Marla.
24:13We flew over the North Pole.
24:15That is you, Kate.
24:17We're a normal family.
24:18This family's a really weird pack of kooks.
24:21That's the shtick, isn't it?
24:22Every family's a little bit off in some way.
24:25And this family's eldest son is on a mission.
24:28Cougars.
24:30Cougars.
24:30We're cougars.
24:31Hello.
24:32Oh, he's definitely gonna try and hook up
24:34with the gals trip gals.
24:35I aspire to be rich enough to wear a caftan
24:37around a resort like this.
24:38We saw you guys on the boat earlier.
24:39Is a caftan the equivalent of a man in a Hawaiian shirt?
24:42Yes.
24:43You guys should get in the pool.
24:44I mean, the temperature's perfect.
24:45Sounds fun.
24:46That's enough, buddy.
24:47Yeah, they're not interested.
24:49It's a numbers game, Mark.
24:50You gotta play the numbers.
24:51I hope he's the one floating in the water.
24:53Then, later that night at the hotel bar.
24:55You'll notice a lot of bald white guys in Thailand.
24:57The locals call them LBHs.
24:59LBHs?
25:00What's LBH?
25:01Losers Back Home.
25:02Ah!
25:04Losers Back Home!
25:06Damn, bald guy, bald guy.
25:08I'll fit in.
25:08They're there to pick up a wife, Keith.
25:10You've already got one.
25:12Are you here by yourself?
25:13No, my boyfriend's hiding from me.
25:15No way, that's like my boyfriend.
25:17I love girl talk.
25:20He's behind me.
25:21Oh, he was there.
25:23He was married to Stifler's mum in the last one.
25:26And she was murdered by the gays.
25:28And he inherited all her wealth.
25:30We just got in a fight, so I'm letting him cool off.
25:32So he must be in Thailand hiding.
25:34You would think that he would go
25:36to a different hotel chain.
25:37Oh yeah, true.
25:38Anyway, back with the creepy family.
25:40Things get even creepier as the older brother
25:43and the younger brother start chatting about.
25:45Getting what you want in life, that's happiness, bro.
25:48What do I want?
25:50Pussy.
25:51Why does it always come down to pussy?
25:53Why can't we just have a hot chocolate?
25:55That's the last thing I would want, hot chocolate.
25:57But I wouldn't want pussy either.
25:59So what kind of porn do you like?
26:00What?
26:01What?
26:02What?
26:02Oh my God, he's not gonna watch porn
26:03with his brother, is he?
26:04Yeah, but it's Thailand.
26:05It's all restricted.
26:06You need a VPN.
26:07I was told.
26:11That brother is cooked.
26:14No!
26:16What's going on here?
26:17But also, just show a little bit more of the angle.
26:20Don't watch your brother.
26:22Shut the door.
26:29I love the music though.
26:30It sets the tone.
26:34Boom.
26:35We're hooked.
26:36At this point, any number of them could be the shooter.
26:39So many obnoxious characters.
26:41I don't know who's gonna die.
26:42How long do I have to wait to find out?
26:44About eight episodes.
26:45Oh man.
26:51Oh, but listen to that.
26:54Yeah, rub it in.
26:55How much longer have you got before you can drink Bailey?
26:58I'm not allowed to drink alcohol for six months.
27:00Why?
27:00Six months?
27:01Yeah.
27:02Can I just have a smell?
27:03I don't want to drink it.
27:04Can I just smell?
27:05Ah.
27:06Oh my God.
27:07Oh my God.
27:08Oh my God.
27:08Oh my God.
27:09Oh my God.
27:10Oh my God.
27:11Oh my God.
27:12Oh my God.
27:13Oh my God.
27:14Oh my God.
27:14Oh my God.
27:15Oh my God.
27:16Oh my God.
27:17Oh my God.
27:18Oh my God.
27:19Oh my God.
27:20Ah.
27:22Ah.
27:25The golden briefcases are out.
27:26That can't have been my thing.
27:28It's time to play
27:29Deal or No Deal.
27:32I love this show.
27:33I'm looking for Zali Muscatello.
27:36Who's that?
27:37Someone from the crowd.
27:38Can I be honest?
27:39After all these years of Deal or No Deal,
27:40I still don't quite understand the rules.
27:42Well, let me explain.
27:44With 22 cases in total,
27:46and by a process of elimination,
27:48Zali hopes the case she chooses
27:51contains $100,000.
27:53What number are you picking?
27:54What number, what number, what number?
27:55I would like case nine, please.
27:57Why nine?
27:58I got a cookie this morning
28:00and I thought I'd count the choc chips on it.
28:01Isn't it Randall?
28:02Yeah, well, if she got a cookie from my cheap cafe,
28:04she'd be choosing three.
28:06Does case number nine contain $100,000?
28:10Here we go.
28:11Steal time, everyone.
28:12All right, let's win big.
28:13Come on.
28:14Come on.
28:14Where would you like to start?
28:15Case three, please.
28:16So, Malik, you always want to see the blues.
28:19You never want to see the greens
28:21because the greens are a lot of money.
28:2350.
28:2550 grand gone first up.
28:27Yeah, I did.
28:28That wasn't supposed to happen.
28:30Not a good start.
28:31You got some friends here?
28:31Who's with you?
28:32So, I have my mum and then we have my dad, Sam.
28:35Great to be here.
28:36Dad's luck is on your side.
28:38We'll go for number seven.
28:39Oh.
28:4075.
28:41Sweetheart, this is not looking good.
28:43We'd love something from the left-hand column.
28:45Come on.
28:46Get the blues.
28:47Mum, I'm thinking 21.
28:49What is it?
28:50And it is.
28:50Five times.
28:51Well done.
28:52Then, as the game progresses,
28:54the bank tries to tempt Zali with a deal.
28:56It's $5,340.
28:58Or no deal.
28:59I'm thinking take it.
29:01Take it.
29:02She could get $100,000.
29:03You wanted to take five.
29:04No deal.
29:05All right.
29:05Well, when you leave with $50, don't say I didn't tell you so.
29:07Did you have a little tough time with health growing up?
29:10Oh, here we go.
29:11Top story time.
29:12I have something called complex regional pain syndrome.
29:14I used to be wheelchair-bound.
29:16Oh.
29:16And just in extreme amounts of pain.
29:18Extreme pain.
29:19If they've just given us a sob story
29:21and she goes home with $25, I'm going to be peeved.
29:23Come on, get the blues.
29:25Okay.
29:25Well, let's see if Zali's luck can change.
29:2850 cents.
29:29Oh, yes.
29:30$250.
29:31Yes.
29:32It's a deal.
29:33Yes.
29:35Baby.
29:36100K still in the game.
29:37Number 10.
29:38Please not be the 100.
29:39Is it going to crush our dreams?
29:41Oh.
29:42Yeah.
29:43Good bank offer coming now.
29:46You absolutely must take that deal.
29:50Take it.
29:51Take it.
29:52Take the money invested in a long-term index fund.
29:5430 years time, 100K.
29:56I can't watch this.
29:57No deal.
29:59No deal, yes.
30:01One case to open.
30:02You might go for 18, please.
30:04Oh my God, this is stressful.
30:06Oh, yes.
30:09Bank offer.
30:10Whatever they offer, take it.
30:1250.
30:13Take that.
30:14It's half of 100.
30:15Take it.
30:16You're so close.
30:17Everyone's saying, take the money.
30:18Deal.
30:19I'm going to do something I might regret.
30:21Oh no, she's going to do no deal.
30:23I'm sorry.
30:24No.
30:25Don't say a deal.
30:26Look at the father.
30:27Look at the father.
30:28Zali.
30:29Take the 50 grand.
30:30Listen to your father.
30:32I know.
30:33No deal.
30:34Don't you do it.
30:34No deal.
30:35No.
30:36No deal.
30:37Yes.
30:38I'm sorry.
30:39The moment you realise your daughter's a gambler.
30:41Oh my God.
30:42I think this is one of the dumbest plays
30:44I've seen on national TV.
30:46I hope she takes out the 100K now.
30:47Oh, she's so close.
30:49I can't watch.
30:50Why am I nervous?
30:51It's a bloody game show.
30:52Here it is.
30:55You saw a cookie with nine chocolate chips on top.
30:58She's really relying a lot on that bloody cookie.
31:00Is it $100,000 or is it $5,000?
31:03I literally can't deal.
31:04Inside, case nine.
31:09Yes.
31:11Yes.
31:15Oh my God.
31:15$100,000.
31:17I've never seen it happen before.
31:19God bless you.
31:20Oh, she won it.
31:21Five grand, Tanya.
31:22Good night.
31:24That was so good.
31:25That really stressed me out.
31:26Yeah, that was wild.
31:27See, we've got to get a cookie with nine chocolate chips.
31:42In Melbourne, Matt Dalton's made Kate a cup of tea.
31:45Hey, there's no milk in that, mate.
31:47There is milk in it.
31:47You just need to put your finger in it and...
31:49I have to put my finger in it?
31:51It's boiling hot water.
31:53Seriously, what is that, Matt?
31:54Why didn't you get me a teaspoon for that?
31:57What about your lipstick?
31:58Wednesday night on nine.
32:01Oh.
32:02Maths?
32:03Let's go.
32:04It's the morning of the fourth dinner party.
32:07Got some intense, ominous music.
32:10Overnight, there's been a dramatic development.
32:13Oh, what's happened?
32:14One of the experiment's strongest couples...
32:17Karina and Paul?
32:18What's happened?
32:19Are waking up in separate apartments.
32:22What's happened?
32:22I felt anxious waking up this morning.
32:25Why?
32:26What happened?
32:26A little bit on the edge.
32:27I don't know.
32:28I don't know.
32:29I don't know.
32:30I don't know.
32:31I don't know.
32:31I don't know.
32:32I don't know.
32:33A little bit on the edge.
32:34Why?
32:35What happened?
32:36I'm just sad.
32:37Why?
32:38What happened?
32:39Come on.
32:39Spill the beans.
32:40Paul and I were coming back from a day out.
32:42Tell me more.
32:43Very happy, lovey-dovey.
32:44That's good.
32:45And then?
32:46In the Uber, I was putting on music.
32:48But?
32:49I put on a song.
32:49I said that I slept with this rapper.
32:54And...
32:55Why would you say that?
32:57Who's the rapper?
32:58Paul obviously got offended by it.
33:00Who was the rapper?
33:02Drake.
33:04Kanye?
33:05And I like instantly was like, I'm so sorry.
33:07I'm sorry?
33:08Are women not allowed to have sexual partners in the past?
33:12Do you think she was a virgin before they met?
33:13And then I went to bed and that's when he got really angry
33:16and he, yeah, punched the wall.
33:17I'm sorry?
33:18He punched the wall?
33:20And we've gone too far.
33:24I was just in shock.
33:25But it'd be scary for Karina to see him get so angry
33:29and punch a wall.
33:30As a woman, that's intimidating.
33:32That's dangerous.
33:34I could hear you trying to apologise.
33:37I don't understand.
33:37Why does she need to apologise to him?
33:39He's carrying on like she slept with the rapper
33:42in front of him.
33:43Relax.
33:44You are so dramatic and it's pissing me off.
33:46No.
33:47Like now I'm getting angry.
33:48I'd be getting angry too.
33:49Because you...
33:50So I punched the wall out of fear now for nothing.
33:53Yes.
33:54Because you're a child.
33:55You can't process your emotions.
33:57Why are we giving him any more air time?
33:58Let's shut him up.
33:59Shut him up.
34:00Yeah.
34:01Let's move on to something a little lighter.
34:02Well, here we are.
34:04Dinner party number four.
34:05Oh no.
34:06Oh.
34:06We win!
34:08And first in is Maff's not so golden couple,
34:11Ryan and Jackie.
34:12Here we go.
34:13Drama.
34:14Yep.
34:15Because Jackie's not happy to see...
34:17Aw, Rhi and Jeff.
34:18Why?
34:19What happened, girlfriend?
34:20I'll tell you, girlfriend.
34:21Jackie's angry because Rhi ratted her out
34:24in front of everyone at the commitment ceremony.
34:26Jackie reached out to Jeff to catch up
34:29for a coffee without me there.
34:30Wait, what happened?
34:31So she messaged the other girl's husband.
34:33And she texts purposely, don't bring your wife.
34:36Yeah.
34:37I just feel like it's not girl code to do that.
34:39But Jackie thinks by bringing up the incident
34:41at the commitment ceremony...
34:43She broke the rules of humanity.
34:44What?
34:45Crime against humanity, relax.
34:48It's not war.
34:49Like mountain, mole hill?
34:50Speaking of which, dinner party time.
34:55Here we go.
34:56Come and get it.
34:56There's something that's been weighing on my mind a lot
34:59and 20 bucks she cries in the first minute.
35:00I was waiting for tears.
35:01It's all right, it's all right, it's all right.
35:02Yes.
35:03Pay up.
35:06The whole texting Jeff situation,
35:09like I feel like you took it too far.
35:11What?
35:12What?
35:13You texted her husband.
35:14Why are you still bringing it up?
35:17What?
35:18What?
35:18You brought it up.
35:19No, you were the ones that did it.
35:20What?
35:21What?
35:22What's going on?
35:23Can you just let me speak?
35:24No.
35:25Oh, I can't take any more idiots tonight, Jackie.
35:27Just sit on it for a week, babe.
35:29Sit on it.
35:30Yeah.
35:30Let's move on to somebody more likeable.
35:32Like Adrian.
35:33I can't even look at him fake.
35:35The whole of Australia is collectively going,
35:37oh, oh, oh, oh.
35:40Adrian's not a favorite of mine.
35:41But let's give Adrian a chance
35:43as he's been trying really hard this week
35:45to be there for his wife.
35:47That's so nice.
35:49She's being sarcastic.
35:51I am.
35:51Oh, you showed up.
35:53How have you showed up?
35:54She's not seen it.
35:56We went for a walk.
35:56I said, hey, come for a walk together.
35:58He's shown up by saying, let's go for a walk.
36:01What?
36:02That's not showing up.
36:03And then, so I said, let's watch a movie tonight.
36:05Okay.
36:06That's nice.
36:07Did we watch a movie?
36:08Yeah, because we finished late at 10 o'clock
36:09and we all got tired.
36:11Oh, that's showing up.
36:12What a romantic he is.
36:13Have you guys gone out for a nice dinner?
36:16Yeah, of course.
36:17Okay.
36:18Good.
36:19No, we haven't.
36:20We went to Nando's.
36:21Oh!
36:22We went to Nando's.
36:25And that's where Bogans take their dates.
36:28Don't diss Nando's, man.
36:29It is delicious.
36:30What's wrong with Nando's?
36:32What are you guys laughing at?
36:33Nando's sauce is premium.
36:34They sell it at Woolies, cuz.
36:36Forget it, bro.
36:37It doesn't matter what I do, it's not good enough.
36:38Oh, he's gonna walk out.
36:39I'm okay with that.
36:40Bye-bye.
36:42Nando's.
36:43Oh my God, that's a ripper.
36:46Oh, thank God.
36:47What in the world?
36:48Wow.
36:48What just happened?
36:49Is it just me, or was that a really weird episode of Mouse?
36:51I'm really finding it hard to keep up.
36:53I don't think you're the only one.
37:10In Melbourne, Anastasia is recovering well
37:13from gastric sleeve surgery.
37:15He has left me with 20% of my stomach.
37:18So where's the rest of it?
37:19In the bin.
37:21He's literally cut it out.
37:22Yeah, where do you want it to go?
37:23In the fricking soup.
37:25Ew.
37:26This week on Netflix.
37:28It's like a stabbing pain in my temples,
37:31but also in the back of my scalp.
37:33It's like fire ants.
37:35We watch the new drama series
37:37based on a real life Australian con artist.
37:40I was given six weeks to live.
37:43That was four years ago.
37:48Apple cider vinegar.
37:49This has gone absolutely viral.
37:52This is that show about the scam woman.
37:54Belle Gibson.
37:56I remember this.
37:57Didn't she make everything up?
37:58Made up that she had cancer,
37:59then made up that her cancer was cured,
38:01then got real famous.
38:03She defied medical advice
38:04and healed herself naturally,
38:06amassing millions of followers.
38:07She was giving money off people,
38:08saying, I'll donate to this and that,
38:10and she took all the money.
38:11That is the most messed up thing.
38:13Oh yeah.
38:13Possible.
38:14Vulnerable followers, outraged and abandoned.
38:16Begs the question,
38:17what sort of person pretends to have brain cancer?
38:19Attention seeking.
38:21A true narcissist.
38:22Psycho.
38:24Belle Gibson has not been paid
38:26for the recreation of her story.
38:27It's good that she's not profiting off this.
38:29Do you reckon she's watching this?
38:31The real one?
38:31Yeah, 100%.
38:33The story starts with Belle
38:34trying to clear her name.
38:36Do you want to tell me how this all started?
38:39I was diagnosed with a stage four brain tumour.
38:43Oh.
38:45Really?
38:45She's so full of shit.
38:47Yes.
38:47You didn't lie or invent anything?
38:49No, no.
38:50Oh, bullshit.
38:51You'd have to be an actual sociopath to do that,
38:54and I am not.
38:55Yes, you are.
38:56I am an empath.
38:57You're delusional.
38:58How would you think of making something like this up?
39:02Well, it all starts with a baby shower.
39:04Hold on, has she actually got a kid?
39:06Yeah, she's got a kid.
39:07Oh my God, that poor child.
39:08But Belle's party doesn't go to plan.
39:11No one came.
39:13Just like Kevin's last birthday.
39:14Ha ha ha ha ha.
39:16I would have hoped for a little more consideration
39:18and support from the people I call friends.
39:20With all the scary medical dramas I've been facing,
39:22it feels pretty tough right now.
39:25Oh, honey.
39:26What medical dramas?
39:27What medical dramas?
39:28Now she's going to make something up.
39:29My doctor said you have a malignant brain cancer.
39:32You have a malignant brain cancer.
39:34Oh my goodness.
39:37So this is the origin story.
39:39Yeah, this is what made her a villain.
39:41I don't know what to say.
39:42What a poor thing.
39:43You are so brave.
39:45The dopamine hit.
39:46Just flooding her brains at this point.
39:48It's actually really sad that the reason this all started
39:50was because she felt like she didn't have any friends.
39:53He's a bloggy, my love.
39:54She's just like you.
39:57Milla Blake.
39:58Who's Milla?
39:59I think Milla's the real deal.
40:00She had cancer and she was like kind of the first blogger
40:03and Belle got inspired by her.
40:05So she ripped off that girl's story.
40:07Yeah.
40:08Bottom line, I helped.
40:11Mate, what do you mean?
40:14Download my brand new app, The Whole Pantry, today.
40:18So she launched a wellness app
40:20and it was based on the fact that she survived brain cancer
40:24because of her diet and her lifestyle.
40:26That's right.
40:27And that wellness app catches the eye
40:29of cancer sufferer, Lucy.
40:31Places like the Hirsch Institute in Mexico
40:34and they treat the whole person.
40:36The cause of our toxicity and not just the symptoms.
40:40She's drunk the Kool-Aid.
40:41I wanted to ask about,
40:43there's this treatment place in Mexico
40:45that a friend recommended.
40:46Who?
40:47Belle Gibson.
40:48Oh, Lucy.
40:49The easiest thing to sell to someone
40:51who's struggling is hope.
40:52I'm gross and I want to keep feeling like this.
40:57Okay.
40:58What's your alternative, Liz?
41:00This Mexico thing?
41:02Because I'm not letting some influencer
41:03undercut years of actual medical research.
41:05You're not letting?
41:07That's great.
41:08Oh, Jesus.
41:09Shit.
41:12This is what that Belle's not seeing,
41:15the damage she does.
41:16This would have happened so many times too.
41:18This is like one story.
41:19Our brother has a brain tumour
41:22and he's getting an operation in a couple of months.
41:24I'm so angry that someone like her
41:28could take advantage of people who are suffering.
41:32What do you think it is that attracted such a following?
41:37I would say my commitment to authenticity.
41:40Oh!
41:41Like, does she think she's telling the truth?
41:44Yeah, I think she believes her own lies 100%.
41:46She is sick, dude, but not the brain cancer sick.
41:50Belle's fame seems unstoppable,
41:52but not everyone is buying her story.
41:55What do you want me to do?
41:56I want to destroy her.
41:57Oh!
41:58Mila!
42:00So now she's got an arch nemesis.
42:01And that's when Belle's non-believers
42:03start digging for the truth.
42:06Chanel, this is Justin, also on Investigations.
42:08Oh, that's the husband.
42:10This is perfect.
42:13Have you heard of Belle Gibson?
42:14Was she done?
42:17She's like, we have just become really good friends.
42:19Sit down, let me tell you a story.
42:21Bitch, I said what they said.
42:23Oh, wow!
42:26I'm absolutely hooked.
42:28Should we just watch the next one now, actually?
42:29Go straight to it, go straight to it.
42:31Let's just binge it now.
42:41You know how you keep giving me shit about how old I'm getting?
42:45Yep.
42:45I just strolled across this little contraption.
42:48I can't believe you have a pill box.
42:50It's, yeah, they're revolutionary, mate.
42:53You know, you can't remember if you're taking
42:54your morning pills or your afternoon pills.
42:56Well, you can, because you're young.
42:59I haven't taken my night pills, actually.
43:01I'm just kidding.
43:02I'm just kidding.
43:03I'm just kidding.
43:04I'm just kidding.
43:04I'm just kidding.
43:05I'm just kidding.
43:06I'm just kidding.
43:07I'm just kidding.
43:08I'm just kidding.
43:09Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
43:10Monday on the ABC.
43:12Just out here looking for some dinner.
43:13Oh, hello.
43:15Look who it is.
43:16Oh, what's his name?
43:17Neil Armstrong.
43:18Nope.
43:19Lance Armstrong?
43:20Lance Armstrong.
43:21It's Tony Armstrong.
43:23Mr. Armstrong himself.
43:24Hello, Tony.
43:25Look at what we got.
43:27Oh, my God.
43:28That's a dead fish.
43:29He did not catch that.
43:30It's not just any dead fish.
43:32I'm not eating that.
43:33That's a carp.
43:34That's a carp.
43:35Tony is on a mission to find a tastier way
43:38to deal with destructive wildlife in Australia.
43:40Welcome to Eat the Invaders.
43:44Carp feast.
43:45Oh, this is gonna be a sick series.
43:47We're turning invasive species into delicious food.
43:51It's a clever tactic.
43:52Good luck.
43:53I'm in the Coorong,
43:55where the Murray River ends,
43:56meeting the Southern Ocean.
43:57It's an ancient place
43:59with huge ecological and cultural significance.
44:02But like so much of the Murray,
44:04carp have overrun
44:05and impacted the Coorong's fragile ecosystem.
44:08They have destroyed massive areas of our environment.
44:12The Yarra wouldn't be muddy if it wasn't for carp.
44:15It's a plague.
44:16It's a plague like the toad frog.
44:17I think you mean cane toad.
44:19Oh, cane?
44:20Didn't even know it was that bad.
44:21Mongrels, the dirtiest looking things.
44:23You ever caught a carp?
44:24I caught heaps of carp.
44:25I've killed heaps of carp, too.
44:26If you catch a carp in the Murray River near my home,
44:29you have to kill it.
44:30How do fish get here and not be natural?
44:32My name is Edward Wilson,
44:34founder of the Acclimatisation Society of Victoria.
44:38Ah, it's the English.
44:40Of course it's them.
44:41So his society began importing the best of Europe,
44:44pheasants, foxes, deer, and rabbits for sport.
44:47Oh.
44:48Are you joking?
44:49And of course, carp.
44:50Carp became a nationally recognised menace.
44:52Ruined every river in Australia.
44:54We used to go carp spearing
44:56when it flooded near our house.
44:57You'd get a piece of PVC pipe
44:58and put some nails around the end of it,
45:00and then you'd go spearing carp.
45:01A destructive invader that Australians refuse to eat.
45:05Why don't people want to eat carp?
45:07They're full of bones.
45:08You ever eaten a carp?
45:09No, never eaten a carp.
45:10You ever scratched your bum and sniffed it?
45:12It's what a carp tastes like.
45:13So you've obviously done both.
45:16G'day, Tony.
45:17So, Tony meets a fisherman
45:18who knows the secret to making carp taste good.
45:21He looks like a fisherman, doesn't he?
45:23He looks like you in six months.
45:27Six months? He looks like me now.
45:29Glenn's approach is more... intimate.
45:32Now, a really good source told me you tickle the fish.
45:34Huh? Sorry?
45:36He tickles the fish?
45:38Oh, he said all right.
45:39So here's this fish, look at it, just sitting here.
45:41Ew!
45:42I don't know about that, man.
45:43It's getting weird.
45:45By not stressing the carp,
45:46Glenn stops the release of histamines
45:48that cause the muddy flavour.
45:49Oh, so when it's stressed, it tastes like mud.
45:52If it's not getting hurt at all,
45:54of course it's not stressing out.
45:55I'm pretty sure it's stressed out
45:57because it's not in the water.
45:58It's just dying.
45:59It's suffocating really slowly.
46:01How many fishes are you catching every day
46:02if he has to pat every single one of them first?
46:05You're lucky to get three.
46:06The carp is a bloody good eating fish,
46:08but now the real challenge.
46:09I'm so happy.
46:10Convincing the rest of Australia.
46:12So I'm doing a blind taste test with some older Aussies
46:15who've grown up eating fish and chips.
46:17Ooh-la-la.
46:18That looks good.
46:19Oh, thanks.
46:21Doesn't everything taste better deep fried?
46:22Yes.
46:23It's not oily, that's what I like.
46:24It's moist, it's got a nice texture.
46:26Are they one of the ones that got nursed onto the boat
46:28and rocked to sleep?
46:30Mm, very good.
46:31Mm, mm, they all love it.
46:33I mean, when I eat fish and chips,
46:34I don't exactly know what fish I'm eating.
46:36No. Doesn't matter.
46:37What would you say if I told you that that fish is carp?
46:40Carp.
46:40You know what?
46:41I've probably eaten carp without even knowing it.
46:43It's like, buddy, that restaurant in Burley here
46:45got closed down because they found out
46:46that they were bloody-
46:47Eating ibis.
46:48Cooking ibis.
46:49But if it was carp, it wouldn't bother me.
46:50Fish is fish.
46:51Carp just got a bad marketing team.
46:53Maybe all food should be eaten as a blind taste test.
46:57Next, Tony and some friends head to the Mona Art Museum
47:00to test the true culinary range of carp.
47:03Mona?
47:04We're in Tassie.
47:06Oh, this is a place we would not be going to.
47:09Welcome, ladies and gentlemen.
47:10Carp, fat, old-fashioned.
47:13Is that a cocktail?
47:14An old-fashioned is, yes.
47:15I could crumb a piece of carp,
47:17but I don't know about drinking it.
47:18It is really, really nice.
47:20You can taste the carp.
47:22Sounds delish.
47:23What you have there is some beautiful grilled carp.
47:26This could be the most ugly, delicious thing
47:28I've ever seen.
47:29And you might find a little bit of plastic.
47:32Plastic?
47:33The plastic on your plate is edible.
47:34No.
47:35Oh, I'd be leaving.
47:36This is one of the Mount Franklin bottles
47:38I found on the road the other day.
47:39Why people will pay like $1,000 for this?
47:42Now, I hope we've sort of changed your perceptions
47:45on how carp can be prepared and eaten.
47:47Is anyone convinced?
47:48I think I'd eat carp now.
47:50One man at a time.
47:52I wouldn't be against trying carp,
47:54especially if I'm doing my part for the Murray River.
47:56We're only a carp tickle away
47:58from changing our culinary history.
48:02Oh, I'm really gonna like this series.
48:04I think that was a really good episode.
48:06All those carp you wasted back in the day.
48:08I could have been eating them for dinner.