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SportsTranscript
00:00Oh, this match is so much better than I remember it being.
00:04It's really great. It's really got good real fast.
00:12I'm going!
00:14My name is Luke Owen, and I love bad wrestling.
00:17Join me on my journey through a cavalcade of crapness,
00:20watching what many believe to be the worst wrestling matches of all time,
00:25to make my friends and you fall in love with bad wrestling too.
00:29This is my quest to find the worst match ever.
00:37Welcome to Worst Match Ever. I am Luke Owen, DAD. I am joined by Tempest.
00:42Every time you start this, I think you're going to say worst,
00:45and then I'm going to have to say match, and then you're going to have to say ever.
00:48That's exactly what I think as well.
00:50Do you want to try that?
00:51Go on.
00:52Welcome to ever. Sorry, welcome to worst.
00:54Tables.
00:55Chairs.
00:57What are we watching, Luke?
01:01I went to the police like a good American.
01:05Ollie and Luke were brought in for watching the Royal Rumble without me,
01:10and the judge said that this wasn't a crime.
01:14Not a crime!
01:17I stood in the courtroom like a fool,
01:20and those bastards, they smiled at me.
01:26I said to my wife, for justice, I need to go to Don Dom.
01:32Why don't you go to the police? Why don't you come to me?
01:36Oh, wait a second. Have you seen my vape?
01:39Your what, Don Dom?
01:41My vape. God, I need my vape.
01:43Anyway, what is it you want me to do?
01:47That I cannot do.
01:49I'll give you anything you ask.
01:51I understand.
01:53You found paradise in America.
01:55Had a good trade, made a good li...
01:57I really do need to find my vape.
01:59Do you have a vape I can have a puff of?
02:01Isn't this a workplace? I'm not sure you're allowed to vape in a workplace.
02:04I don't know the rules.
02:06Anyway, as I was saying,
02:08you didn't need a friend of me.
02:10But now you come to me and you say,
02:12Don Dom, give me justice.
02:14But you don't ask with respect.
02:16You don't offer friendship.
02:18You don't even think to call me Godfather.
02:20Instead, you come into my house
02:22on the day of my daughter is to be married,
02:24and you ask me to do murder for my...
02:26No, seriously, I need this vape.
02:28Is it under the table? Have a look under the table.
02:30Don Dom, um, have you ever tried fumes?
02:34Fumes?
02:36Fumes?
02:38Have you ever tried fume?
02:40What's fume?
02:42Fume is an award-winning
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02:58fidget tool with magnets and clicks that help
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03:02Premium quality, sleek design,
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03:06Flavored air isn't like vaping.
03:08If vapor was compared to sticky soda,
03:10fume cores are closer to herbal teas.
03:12Fume has lots of delicious
03:14flavors to choose from, like crisp,
03:16mint, and orange vanilla. With
03:18flavored air, you can satisfy your oral fixation
03:20through a passive diffusion system
03:22that utilizes no electronics,
03:24vapor, or combustion.
03:26Fume has already helped over 300,000
03:28people build better habits. Try fume
03:30today, and if you order the Journey Pack now
03:32using the code PARTSFUNKNOWN, you'll get
03:34a free fume topper, an awesome
03:36accessory to level up your experience.
03:38Go to tryfume.com slash
03:40partsfunknown, or scan the QR code
03:42on screen.
03:46My God, this is fantastic.
03:48And no nicotine as well.
03:50You can accept this justice as a gift
03:52on my daughter's wedding day.
03:54What did you want done again?
03:56I want you to murder Ollie and Luke.
03:58Oh, yeah, wow.
04:00That's, uh...
04:02That's quite extreme.
04:04But, um, luckily
04:06for you, I really like fume.
04:12Hello, Worst Match Ever
04:14fans. If you enjoy this show as much as
04:16I think you do, consider signing up to our
04:18Patreon at patreon.com forward slash WrestleTalk,
04:20where you can watch each and every one
04:22of these matches along with us,
04:24including the pile of garbage you're about
04:26to see.
04:28Oh, yeah.
04:30Oh, yeah.
04:32Yep.
04:34This has been long,
04:36long requested
04:38ever since we started this show.
04:40Love this.
04:42This has been requested
04:44so many times.
04:46Yep.
04:48We've done the other worst elimination
04:50chamber match of all time,
04:52so now it's time we do the
04:54actual worst one. Yes.
04:56Holy God.
04:58Let's go for that one moment where everything goes horribly wrong.
05:00Yeah. Because up until then, it's done.
05:02Just the one moment?
05:04Well, there's that one very significant moment
05:06where Dolph Ziggler's just pointing
05:08at people and telling them what
05:10to do. Including the
05:12referee.
05:14You go here! You go there!
05:18Oh, Lord.
05:20Yeah, this is... I would say
05:22this, like, um...
05:24Obviously, the ones we won't do, like
05:26Geoff at Victory Road and the
05:28Jake the Snake at Legend of Heroes of Wrestling
05:30and stuff. We won't do those matches, but they get
05:32requested a lot. This, I think, is
05:34the most legit match that we would
05:36do that gets requested the most.
05:38Mm-hmm. Yeah.
05:40I think that's about right.
05:42So, Mark Henry
05:44comes out. Mark Henry,
05:46a surprise entry.
05:48Good to put him out first. Weird that they
05:50brought him out first. Yeah, that's really weird.
05:52Yeah, get the surprise out of the way.
05:54Christmas. Yeah. Yeah.
05:56It's why I tell everyone what they're gonna get before they
05:58unwrap it.
06:00There was one year that I told
06:02my mom, I was like, listen,
06:04I really love how you do Christmas and everything,
06:06but I have some notes. I have some notes as to
06:08how we can make Christmas
06:10the best experience.
06:12I don't want the big present right at the start.
06:14If there's a big present, you save it a little bit.
06:16Let's build up to it a little bit.
06:18That's what we need here. You build up to the surprise
06:20of Mark Henry.
06:22I can't
06:24remember why Mark Henry
06:26was a surprise. Like, someone got hurt.
06:28What year is this? This is
06:302015. Because when you look at
06:32the lineup of names,
06:34it literally could be 2015 or it could be
06:362007. Oh, yeah, yeah.
06:38Well, that's not true because half of these
06:40folk weren't in WWE in 2007.
06:42When did Sheamus come in? 2009.
06:44Sheamus is 09.
06:46Wade Barrett is 2010.
06:48Ziggler... Technically was
06:50surely. Yeah.
06:52Technically he was a cheerleader
06:54at the time. He was.
06:56But he became
06:58Dolph Ziggler in 2008.
07:00And I forget who else is
07:02in this stupid bag. R-Truth. R-Truth
07:04was still in TNA
07:06in 2007 with Pac-Man Jones.
07:08Yeah, then 2008 goes back. So what you're
07:10saying, Luke, is absolute bollocks.
07:12Alright. That's what we're saying.
07:14I'll re-evaluate then. It could be
07:162015, it could be 2010, it could be
07:182016, it could be 2013, it could be
07:202019. Because none of these lads really move.
07:22Or it could be 2007.
07:26The 2010s are a rough decade
07:28for WWE. Well, I would say
07:30the mid-2000s
07:32through to about 2022
07:34was a bad time for the midcard
07:36in WWE where people just don't
07:38advance.
07:40You are just there. And you're just there
07:42forever. Occasionally, there will be
07:44lads that win the WWE Championship
07:46but very quickly then lose it and just go right
07:48back down to the midcard like
07:50nothing happened. Sheamus is an example.
07:52Kofi Kingston is one. Dolph Ziggler is one
07:54of them. The Miz. The Miz is one of them. Jack Swagger.
07:56Jack Swagger. There's a bunch of guys that
07:58get pushed. Rob Van Dam.
08:00Get pushed but then just
08:02go right back down to where they were
08:04once they're like, eh, but you're not Randy Orton
08:06so I don't actually want to push you.
08:08Yeah.
08:10I'm trying to remember how this
08:12match came about. Yeah, and how
08:14truth ended up in this match really
08:16because it felt
08:18like at this time he was lower
08:20than the midcard.
08:22Is this a February
08:24chamber show? No. So
08:26I do know some bits
08:28of how this has all come together.
08:30So this show wasn't originally even supposed
08:32to be a pay-per-view. This
08:34was going to be a house show
08:36but Daniel Bryan has to vacate
08:38the Intercontinental title, right?
08:40He wins it at WrestleMania
08:42and immediately has to give it up because he gets hurt
08:44the next day. Yeah. The injury that would
08:46ultimately kind of
08:48put a spanner in the works
08:50for a two year period of his career.
08:52So they have to determine
08:54what they're going to do with the Intercontinental title
08:56so for some reason they're like,
08:58let's do an Elimination Chamber pay-per-view
09:00in May with this show
09:02that was going to be a house show.
09:04So these people all bought tickets to a house
09:06show and then it turned into a
09:08pay-per-view. What a treat. That's mental.
09:10So I'm sure they weren't upset
09:12and then they watched this match and went,
09:14I think I would have preferred the house show.
09:16But because this is a pay-per-view
09:18this also leads to
09:20the main roster debut of Kevin Owens
09:22because they need big matches for this show
09:24so they do KO and John Cena
09:26the first time at this show.
09:28That match is real good.
09:30It's a brilliant match. What a Cena's best.
09:32What a KO's best as well.
09:34But there's a lot of very weird
09:36ripple effect type things just from
09:38this show turning into a
09:40show in the first place. I think
09:42there's another person
09:44that was supposed to be in this match
09:46that got hurt.
09:48It might have been like, Pac.
09:50Oh, let's say
09:52Moe. Or something.
09:54You know, like Neville had been
09:56called up just before this
09:58and Neville and Wade Barrett
10:00are feuding over King of the Ring
10:02nonsense around this time.
10:04You know? There's stuff
10:06happening. I don't know why they wouldn't
10:08just run back the lineup from that
10:10Intercontinental title ladder match
10:12that was at WrestleMania that Daniel Bryan wins.
10:14But
10:16there's stuff going on.
10:18You know? But essentially
10:20this whole
10:22show and this match
10:24and everything is
10:26just thrown together.
10:28Hello, I'm King Barrett.
10:30That's mad.
10:32This is why
10:34things like this
10:36made me hate King of the Ring.
10:38Well, that whole
10:40outfit there is really rubbish.
10:42Look at that crown.
10:44The crown's terrible. Dollar store crown.
10:46You win and all of a sudden
10:48King is your gimmick
10:50for the next year and a bit.
10:52Or if you're King Booker, the rest of your career.
10:54At least he
10:56had fun with it.
10:58King Booker worked.
11:00I know a lot of people remember
11:02Booker T more as King Booker
11:04for that year of his career than they
11:06do for just being Booker T.
11:08I think King Booker is one of the
11:10actually I think it's the best thing that he did do
11:12it's the best thing he did in his WWE
11:14run. By a wide margin.
11:16By a wide margin.
11:18But like
11:20Boosh.
11:22To be honest, I forgot where Barrett
11:24ever was King Barrett.
11:26Completely forgot about that.
11:28How did you do in the King of the Ring episode of Survival Series?
11:30Not great.
11:32I don't think you were on that one, were you?
11:34Oh no, maybe
11:36you tested me afterwards
11:38and then I was like...
11:40You did test me afterwards and I didn't do amazingly.
11:42I didn't do horrendously but I did do amazingly.
11:44Here he is. Captain Midcard himself.
11:46Which means you go to
11:48TNA and win their world title. Yes.
11:50A decade
11:52later. Yeah.
11:54I feel bad for
11:56Dolph a lot of the time.
11:58It was
12:00really entertaining to
12:02watch. It was.
12:04He went through this whole period of time
12:06in 2014 where he kept like every time he
12:08came out being like, they can hear you!
12:10They're listening! Because everyone kept getting these big
12:12reactions. I was like, they're listening! And I was like,
12:14they're just not. They're not.
12:16But you really believe that
12:18they will. And it
12:20baffled me that you've been there for nearly
12:22a decade at this point and you
12:24still think that they're going to listen and push you.
12:26Why is his
12:28tights the Harley Davidson logo?
12:30It could be from where this
12:32pay-per-view took place.
12:34They're in Corpus Christi.
12:36Is that the home of the Harley Davidson
12:38logo? You know, Luke, I don't
12:40know. It's time to go
12:42to Google. Hold on. I've got the Google
12:44machine. But no, you are right with
12:46Dolph Ziggler. Like, this is
12:48I suppose six months or so
12:50after the Survivor Series.
12:52Where he has his like
12:54maybe now
12:56moment with the Sting deal
12:58and his breakout performance,
13:00whole Survivor, all this.
13:02And then he's just not.
13:04He's just one of the geeks.
13:06Milwaukee, Wisconsin
13:08is where the Harley Davidson
13:10motorcycle factory building
13:12was constructed in 1906.
13:14I believe it's pronounced Millie Waukee.
13:18Which is Algonquin for
13:20the good land.
13:22I did not know that.
13:24Does this guy know how to party or what?
13:26Yes, Pete, it is.
13:28So we start off with
13:30Barrett and Dolph Ziggler.
13:32That's a pretty good start to this kind of match.
13:34You know, like
13:36of...
13:38I'm trying to remember who else is in this match already.
13:40Of all of them.
13:42They all make their entrance.
13:44Who's in this match again?
13:46Of the six of them, I think these two
13:48are probably my favourite.
13:50Yeah?
13:52There's another guy.
13:54There's another guy who's just like,
13:56you're just going to be in the mid card forever now.
13:58There's no way you're going any further.
14:00If you win the IC title and you lose it,
14:02three months later you'll just be facing for it again.
14:04But with a different guy.
14:06Yeah, it seems like WWE this time
14:08had a philosophy of like, well what we've done
14:10is we've put you in a really, really good position
14:12of like, you're going to be
14:14now in the main
14:16event potentially.
14:18And then we've decided not to do that
14:20and now we're going to blame you.
14:22And it's actually your fault.
14:24Yeah, you've done that.
14:26Oh, Dolph Ziggler, you had a great
14:28performance in the Survivor Series. Incredible performance
14:30in fact. Soul Survivor, amazing.
14:32Brilliant. Yeah, yeah. But what we're going to do
14:34is we're going to not do that.
14:38Your problem, Dolph,
14:40is that you're not John Cena.
14:42And that's your fault.
14:44Your name's Dolph Ziggler, even though it isn't really.
14:46We called you that.
14:48And you can't have
14:50somebody called Dolph Ziggler, you know,
14:52doing well, so I'm sorry.
14:54Dolph. He really was
14:56f***ed. Yeah, I mean. They called him
14:58Dolph Ziggler. Yeah.
15:00I mean, just.
15:02He did his best. He did a very good job
15:04considering.
15:06Oh, you know, I was a Dolph guy.
15:08I was big Dolph. Hashtag heel.
15:10His
15:12feud with Zack Ryder over the US title,
15:14that was like the first time I cared about
15:16a mid-card thing, like, ever.
15:18Again, like, that's just.
15:20That could be from any year. Yeah.
15:22Yeah, it really could.
15:24Dolph Ziggler having a feud over the US title
15:26could be any year. Yeah.
15:28But it's most likely the year when Z True Long Island
15:30story. I say the year, probably a year after
15:32Z True Long Island. No, that was
15:34honestly, for that moment,
15:36it all worked out.
15:38Z True Long Island story culminates
15:40in December of 2011.
15:42End of that year, like, he starts it in February.
15:44Gets really over.
15:46They give him the US title and he wins it
15:48from Dolph Ziggler after they'd actually
15:50done a very good little YouTube
15:52rivalry. They were just cutting promos
15:54on each other and it was actually pretty good.
15:56They cut their own highlight back
15:58because they weren't going to get the
16:00vignette deal. Nope. They put it on
16:02Z True Long Island story and it was good.
16:04Then they had an opening match and
16:06everyone loved it. Zack won. It was
16:08this great thing. They took the belt off
16:10three weeks later. Yeah, because he got himself over.
16:12Yeah, what an asshole. Exactly, what a dick.
16:14He got actively
16:16punished for getting over.
16:18That seemed to happen a lot under
16:20Vince. That was his, sort of like,
16:22he was made as a brando, wasn't he?
16:24There was a show, like, during
16:26the height of Z True Long Island story
16:28that was in Long Island, New York
16:30and they did not book Zack for
16:32the show as punishment
16:34because he got himself over.
16:36I mean, that's so mad. He was on Superstars.
16:38Here comes R-Truth.
16:40Now, you know,
16:42we were talking about this mid-card
16:44and everything. Oh, he's beating R-Truth in the pod.
16:46We were
16:48talking about this. A moment ago
16:50I looked at the people that were actually in this match
16:52and went, holy shit.
16:54No wonder this match
16:56is shit. You know, this is
16:582015 You Look
17:00Stupid, Seamus. Yep.
17:02Which is not a good time
17:04for Seamus character-wise
17:06or work-wise. He's
17:08not a particularly good wrestler at this
17:10point in time. He does get to win the world title though.
17:12Yep. You got R-Truth
17:14after he's become
17:16comedy goofball.
17:18You've got Ryback.
17:20Need I say more? And you
17:22have, on the verge of retirement,
17:24Mark Henry. Yeah.
17:26This was never going to happen. See this there?
17:28The little Totino's logo?
17:30That's a nice way to do a bit of sponsorship
17:32for a match. Yeah. It's not the Totino's
17:34Elimination Chamber.
17:36Might have helped it though.
17:38Honestly.
17:40This is so bizarre. This, I can't
17:42remember which one goes on earlier in the show
17:44because there's two Elimination Chamber matches
17:46on the show, right? There's this one
17:48and there's the first ever Tag Team one.
17:50Yes, yes. The New Day
17:52retained the titles or whatever.
17:54And I can't remember which of these goes on last
17:56but, regardless,
17:58this is the last appearance of the original
18:00Elimination Chamber.
18:02Oh, with the chain link floor and stuff.
18:04Yeah. The grate.
18:06You get the whopper griddle
18:08marks on your back when you take a bump.
18:10And True's now making a little comeback here.
18:14Man. This match.
18:16For the most part, though, it's been like
18:18every mid-card WWE match.
18:20It's just, you do a bunch of moves
18:22and get some heat. So there's nothing
18:24incompetent about it.
18:26There's nothing offensive about this right now.
18:28But who could care? Oh yeah, who could care?
18:30That's the mid-card right there.
18:32It's a nothing match for the moment.
18:34For the moment.
18:38I can't wait
18:40to...
18:42It's one of my favourite things.
18:44Sullivan's having his own personal fireworks factory.
18:50I just remember laughing so much
18:52when it happened.
18:54I watched it with
18:56my friend Pete
18:58in my house in Bristol.
19:00And I went, oh, it's all gone wrong.
19:04Boss man slam!
19:06The winds of change, I think that was called.
19:10You hear that? You hear the winds of change?
19:12One of these days, I am really
19:14gonna let you teach that
19:16guy a lesson.
19:18That's a Monster Zinc reference
19:20in 2024.
19:222025, pardon me.
19:24It's Mike Wazowski.
19:26Randall goes to him and he's like, hear that?
19:28It's the winds of change.
19:30He walks away and Mike just goes,
19:32you hear that? You hear the winds of change?
19:34F***ing god, I'm proud.
19:36It's everything.
19:38It's all I ever think about.
19:40You hear that? You hear the winds of change?
19:44How do you come back from that?
19:46He's done, he ended you. Your career is over.
19:52If you are a mid-card guy in WWE in 2015
19:54and you're calling one of your moves
19:56the winds of change, you are absolutely f***ed.
19:58You are not getting a push.
20:00That is you trying to send a message.
20:02Oh no!
20:04Oh no, the pod's open.
20:06But like, bullets can't...
20:08Oh dear.
20:10Mark? You know, you gotta go back in.
20:12Just go wait there.
20:14You wait there, sir.
20:16I guess I should come out.
20:18I think you just gotta wait there, sir.
20:20Nope, nope.
20:22Oh no, you're just getting in.
20:26Hello.
20:28Yep, you're in the match now.
20:30I tell ya, a deer in the headlights
20:32would say to another deer
20:34in the headlights,
20:36you look like a Mark Henry in an elimination chamber.
20:38Here comes the countdown timer.
20:40I hope it was Mark
20:42that was next.
20:44And I hope they changed it if it wasn't.
20:46Hi.
20:48His name's still there,
20:50but we're only picking one of the two now.
20:52Okay.
20:54I don't know what would've made more sense.
20:56Hey, it's Ryback.
20:58Would it make more sense to have it up there or not?
21:00Yeah, it's so...
21:02It's alright, guys. I think we can figure this out.
21:04It's Ryback and Mark Henry.
21:06We can definitely figure this one all out.
21:08It's all gonna come up Milhouse eventually.
21:10Oh, yep.
21:12Much like the...
21:14Whenever you see Ryback, do you always just think of,
21:16I'm dumb as f**k.
21:18I do.
21:20He's a f**king guy.
21:22Cool.
21:24He's so
21:26s**t.
21:28I just pushed him over.
21:30Can I bought a paper
21:32because I thought he's gonna win the WWE title.
21:34He's gonna win the WWE championship, obviously,
21:36and Punk.
21:38It was that year, it was like 2012.
21:40I remember Jericho went on a podcast
21:42to win, just like, yeah, well,
21:44maybe he does win the WWE title.
21:46And then, guess what? He got a new guy.
21:48Then he goes to WrestleMania. Maybe he faces The Undertaker.
21:50And then he beats The Undertaker.
21:52I was like, I think Chris Jericho has lost the plot.
21:54I think he's lost his mind.
21:58Man.
22:00That would not have been the right move.
22:02We bought the pay-per-view thing.
22:04Moral, really, we bought the pay-per-view thing.
22:06How are they gonna get out of this situation?
22:08Because Punk ain't losing.
22:10I think he's gonna beat Mark in January.
22:12So, you're not just gonna beat Ryback.
22:14What are you gonna do?
22:16Oops.
22:18That was nice.
22:20Mark looks like he's glitching.
22:22Oh, Mark has very much glitched out.
22:24He doesn't quite know what to do.
22:26He's just like,
22:28No!
22:30Just do anything!
22:32Do something!
22:34Do something!
22:36No, don't interrupt an elimination.
22:38Why would you do that in an elimination chamber?
22:40There's another man!
22:42Stood right behind you!
22:44Mark Henry there.
22:46The person who was playing as Mark Henry was like,
22:48Actually, sir, I've got a phone call.
22:50Hello?
22:52No, I'm not interested in your car salesman.
22:54Get out of here.
22:56I don't need insurance.
22:58The AI is just doing this.
23:00I'm just gonna break up your pin now.
23:02Oh, my God.
23:04Oh, this match is so much better
23:06than I remember it being.
23:08It's really got good real fast.
23:16Oh, no.
23:18He's now got the red pad.
23:20That's dangerous.
23:22Mark Henry's been wrestling for 20 years.
23:24He didn't just look around at our troops.
23:26He's just been on the floor
23:28for ages as well.
23:30No discernible reason.
23:32Could this be it?
23:34Could this be elimination?
23:36It is. Wade Barry is out.
23:38Enjoy that new gimmick of yours, King.
23:40Hey, it's that guy again.
23:42Front row.
23:44One of the more competent guys that we had in the match.
23:46Better get rid of him first.
23:48Oh, my God.
23:50Oh, here we go.
23:52I don't know what to do.
23:54You guys don't know what to do.
23:56Why don't you go over there
23:58and you...
24:00What we're gonna do is...
24:02Okay.
24:04I can't believe I haven't told you
24:06what to do just yet.
24:10Has everyone got phone calls?
24:14They're all like crabs
24:16walking around.
24:18Oh, my God.
24:20Feeling each other out.
24:22Incredible.
24:24I'm lightheaded.
24:26This match is a f***ing masterpiece.
24:28And yet somehow Mark has run out of ideas.
24:30Oh, yeah.
24:32I gave him some instructions
24:34and he's already run out of ideas.
24:36Mark Henry's been in one of these matches before.
24:38Yeah, he knows how to do this.
24:40Surely.
24:42Mark is a guy that when he won the world title
24:44was like, are you sure with Mark?
24:46He's been doing this for a long time and he's not very good at it.
24:48Then all of a sudden the Hall of Pain thing was awesome.
24:50It was so good.
24:52And then the second that was over...
24:54Back to it.
24:56Oh, no.
24:58Seamus is stuck.
25:00Come on, fella.
25:02I can't unlock it.
25:04It's stuck.
25:06Help me.
25:08Don't kick your way out.
25:12They're just talking to each other.
25:14F***.
25:16Why are they just having a chat?
25:18Dolph, what do I do now?
25:20What do I do next?
25:22I don't know, Ryback.
25:24Let's just try some pins.
25:26There we go.
25:28A pinning sequence.
25:30Did he get him?
25:32That was a three.
25:34Try another pin.
25:36And now let's stop again.
25:38We need to wait until Seamus comes out
25:40before we can do our next series of spots.
25:42Oh, my God.
25:44Has anyone told Mark this?
25:46Does anyone know about improvisation?
25:48I don't think.
25:50I don't think I've ever seen
25:52a WWE match
25:54fall apart.
25:56And it really is just falling apart.
25:58People...
26:00Have they never worked a match
26:02where they haven't worked out everything?
26:04We've got to get him out of here.
26:06We've got to get Mark Henry
26:08out of this f***ing match.
26:10We've got to do it now.
26:12I think Mark's the problem.
26:14He was meant to be there right at the end.
26:16That's it, Ryback, do the chant.
26:18Oh, God.
26:20I can understand
26:22the fans for the match falling apart
26:24and everyone kind of having to be like,
26:26we need to communicate what we're going to do to each other.
26:28That does not mean you stop
26:30and have a football
26:32huddle.
26:34And go, okay, you go over there
26:36and you do this, whatever.
26:38And also, for f***'s sake,
26:40this is not that complicated.
26:42No, it's really not.
26:44Just punch each other.
26:46Just punch each other for a bit.
26:48Maybe do some little moves here and there.
26:50Don't do anything too complicated or too unsafe.
26:52You just need to keep on punching each other.
26:54Treat it like a rumble when you're just kicking
26:56somebody into the, you know,
26:58just pushing their face into the corner for a bit.
27:00I do want to just stress again,
27:02this all fell apart because
27:04Mark Henry came out a bit early.
27:06And that is it.
27:08Yeah, because this shameless
27:10spot, that's all
27:12deliberate, right?
27:14He can't get out.
27:16I think it's
27:18doesn't he do the thing where he's like,
27:20we'll see in seconds, I'm sure,
27:22where he's like put his cross
27:24in there or something, I can't remember.
27:26But I don't know whether that was covering
27:28for the fact that maybe the door broke.
27:30Ryback, you could waste so much time doing a delayed vertical suplex.
27:32You could have had a full conversation with Dolph
27:34about all the spots you wanted to do during that bit.
27:36Rather than just standing there
27:38being like, hey Ryback,
27:40do you want to come do this bit next?
27:42And Dolph Ziggler
27:44with all of his blood in his head
27:46is more intelligent than a regular Ryback.
27:50It would be...
27:52God.
27:54Come on Seamus.
27:56Maybe his door was stuck.
27:58I don't actually know the story.
28:00He's laughing.
28:02He's laughing.
28:04We figured it out.
28:06I decided to put this
28:08in here and I've taken it out now
28:10for no discernible reason.
28:12How did that block the door open?
28:14I have no idea, bro.
28:16Because the door goes that way.
28:18So it would have just fallen.
28:20He could have stayed in there.
28:22He could have stayed in there the entire match.
28:24So that was planned
28:28and yet it really made
28:30everyone seem more confused.
28:34Didn't it just though?
28:36It felt like they knew that the match had broken down
28:38so much they were like, we can make this spot
28:40look even more real by just pretending
28:42that the match has fallen down even more than it already had.
28:44I think that's exactly what they did.
28:46Which is a mad idea.
28:48Oh, man.
28:50Also, why would you come out now
28:52if you're Seamus? Why wouldn't you wait until the last person?
28:54Why would you...
28:56Ah, that's it. That's the smarts right there.
28:58Yeah, well that's it.
29:00He's the thinking man's wrestler.
29:02Everyone's down now.
29:04There's now three guys
29:06for me to pin rather than one.
29:08Ergo
29:10tripling my chances of winning.
29:14Oh, look at Mark Henry's big neck.
29:16His big back of his neck.
29:18World's strongest slam.
29:20Oh, Seamus got out of it.
29:22It is the
29:24end of this year where Seamus wins the W title, right?
29:26Sure is. Yeah, because he wins Money in the Bank, right?
29:28He does. Like a month after this.
29:30If that.
29:32I think it's like two weeks after this actually.
29:34Because I was in...
29:36Was I in New York then?
29:38When does he cash it in?
29:40Survivor Series. No, I was not in New York then.
29:42He was WWE champion when I was in New York.
29:44Because I watched the WWE pay-per-view in the time frame where
29:46I wasn't able to win. TLC?
29:48Yeah. He beats Roman and then loses the next day.
29:50Mark Henry has been eliminated.
29:52Mark Henry is now out the mat.
29:54Yeah! Get over there, Mark!
29:58Oh my God.
30:00See? Maybe Seamus did make the right call getting in now.
30:02Look how smart he looks. He eliminated Mark Henry.
30:04He's the strongest man.
30:06Now he's just got Ziggler.
30:08Wait, is R-Truth still in the match?
30:10No, he got eliminated.
30:12So he's just got Ziggler and Ryback now.
30:14And Ryback's fine.
30:16That's a generous fine.
30:18There is someone I'd trust to be in this match.
30:20It's probably Ryback.
30:22No.
30:24I can't agree with that.
30:26But I want to go back to what you said, Simon.
30:28You could just
30:30go to the corner with these guys
30:32and kind of
30:34glom them a little bit.
30:36It wouldn't look good.
30:38Anybody who's ever seen
30:40even anybody who just saw
30:42this f***ing cage
30:44just, if there's four of you,
30:46pair off, go to the outside bits,
30:48throw each other into the chain.
30:50Yeah. That's it.
30:52Into the chain. Put their head in the deal.
30:54Throw them into the f***ing pod that's already broken.
30:56Yep.
30:58There are so many things you could do.
31:00And all of them would be better than just
31:02alright, mate, you go...
31:04Mark! Mark, stay there!
31:08For the love of God, Mark!
31:10Don't move!
31:12You'll only make it worse!
31:14Here comes Dolph. He's firing back.
31:16This will get me a push.
31:18From here on in, I have no memory
31:20whether this is alright or just
31:22very, like...
31:24No.
31:26Does it get worse, or is it...
31:28It's like the start of the match.
31:30It's every WWE mid-card match.
31:32It's just now gone back to boring.
31:36It's because we got rid of Mark Henry.
31:38He was the glue.
31:42Man.
31:44Man. F*** me.
31:46This is why, like, when I see
31:48this now, and I'm just watching these lads wrestle,
31:50I'm like, oh, this is why I did not care about WWE
31:52for, like, so long.
31:54So long.
31:56Yeah.
31:58This is a bad year.
32:00Like, they're all bad years.
32:02You know?
32:04But 2015 was a
32:06bad time.
32:08It was really bad. And yeah, so I think 2019 is worse.
32:10Yeah. 2019's worse.
32:122019 is horrible.
32:14Horrible to
32:16a level
32:18hitherto undreamt of.
32:20Seriously, just a hitherto undreamt of?
32:22But, man.
32:24Outside of Wrestlemania,
32:26because Wrestlemania in 2015
32:28is really good. Heist of the Century, all that.
32:30Outside of that,
32:32this was, like, the worst it had been.
32:34Yeah, that's a really good Wrestlemania.
32:36And then, like, every year, it just keeps getting worse.
32:38I really do think there is a
32:40fun podcast series in looking back at 2019,
32:42like, week by week.
32:44Yeah? You want to do it?
32:46No.
32:48I don't want anyone else to do it. I can listen to it.
32:52Bro kick!
32:54Is that going to be Dolph out of the match?
32:56Poor Dolph. This is what you get for quarterbacking this match.
32:58There you go, Dolph.
33:00Dolph, how did you never learn?
33:02Why were you there for so long?
33:04This is sort of it.
33:06I don't ever want to say,
33:08oh, they should do this, they should do that with their careers.
33:10It's their lives.
33:12I'm sure he was making really good money and all that.
33:14But if
33:16Dolph wanted to be a top guy,
33:18he needed to go the Drew McIntyre,
33:20Cody Rhodes route.
33:22He should have left
33:24this year and gone to New Japan.
33:26You know?
33:28Or do a run
33:30in TNA, do a run
33:32on the big indie circuits, go to
33:34PWG, do Ring of Honor,
33:36WCPW at the time.
33:38Do all of that.
33:40And he did it
33:42ten years later.
33:44It's too late now.
33:46I don't see him
33:48coming back and having that Drew McIntyre,
33:50Cody thing.
33:52He is currently the TNA world champion.
33:54I guarantee you there are some people in the
33:56comment section of this video that did not know that.
33:58Yeah, there definitely will be.
34:02God, he looks stupid, doesn't he?
34:04Yeah.
34:06I didn't hate this Seamus look.
34:08That's because you're madly.
34:10He's got little
34:12beads in his beard.
34:14He's like a little pirate.
34:16Is he a pirate or is he a modern day man?
34:18He's not
34:20a pirate, is he?
34:22Oh look, Bryan Danielson's here.
34:24He's just sitting there looking grumpy.
34:26Has Bryan Danielson been there the entire time?
34:28Why didn't the camera show that Bryan Danielson
34:30was there?
34:32Why didn't he quarterback this match?
34:34Is there anyone that could have fixed this
34:36had it been for Bryan Danielson?
34:38Go to the side of the cage and be like,
34:40Mark! Mark, go over there!
34:44It'll make more sense.
34:46He's furious.
34:48He's watching the worst match he's ever seen
34:50in his life.
34:54Oh my god.
34:56But don't worry, it's this era Seamus and Ryback.
34:58Who's gonna win?
35:00I don't remember
35:02who wins this.
35:04F***
35:06Oh my god.
35:082015
35:10Ryback as well.
35:12We're way past the period of him being over.
35:14No one cares.
35:16He's like,
35:18what, second or third man
35:20gone on Team Cena before this?
35:22Not Survivor Series deal.
35:24Not Dolph, who wins this f***ing thing!
35:26Oh let me get my
35:28stupid jade again!
35:30Oh I can't reach it! Oh no!
35:32This match is so funny.
35:34Sigh.
35:36What has happened?
35:38This match has got incredibly boring.
35:40It's getting sloppy again though.
35:42We got rid of Dolph.
35:44The other glue.
35:48Oh god.
35:50Oh god.
35:54Imagine taking
35:56that bump for this match.
35:58Oh that is dumb as f***.
36:00Man,
36:02I tell ya.
36:04I would
36:06never in a million years
36:08take that f***ing bump.
36:10It is. And you know what?
36:12It's like when
36:14Elimination Chambers were men and all that.
36:16Whatever.
36:18Elimination Chambers were men.
36:20It's only a night.
36:22It's like Danny Wayne woke the following years.
36:24You know?
36:26That's a good bit.
36:28Six men inside of a man.
36:34Made of steel. Four pods inside
36:36the man.
36:42I do get it.
36:44I would never in a million...
36:46I would take bumps into barbed wire,
36:48into thumbtacks. You could probably convince
36:50me to take a bump into fire
36:52before I would take like a choke slam
36:54on that f***ing grave.
36:56Look at his back, man.
36:58To be fair, it was rough already
37:00before he went into the ring.
37:02Stop doing it!
37:04I remember when Rusev was walking
37:06around on this and there was a period of time
37:08when he didn't have any boots on.
37:10Umaga does the same thing in one of them.
37:12You know?
37:14I trust Umaga to do it though because I think that man was
37:16hard as nails.
37:18I'm sure he probably didn't even notice.
37:20Have you seen this
37:22interview clip where the Usos
37:24are talking about Solo and he starts
37:26wearing his boots because he was walking to the ring
37:28and he's like, my feet hurt.
37:36Which is fair, but it's so
37:38funny that he said it.
37:40It's very not Solo Sekoa.
37:42Eh, shell shock.
37:44Okay, well this is the f***ing problem with
37:46WWE's midcard, right? This is where nothing
37:48f***ing matters at all. He did the big
37:50move on the outside, did another big move on the outside,
37:52River just got up and hit his furnish and won.
37:54So what was the f***ing point of either of the moves then?
37:56Like, they don't build to anything.
37:58Yeah.
38:00There's nothing. This is just stuff happening.
38:02And then one of them wins.
38:04Man, I tell ya,
38:06Dave Meltzer gives this match
38:08two stars in the Observer.
38:10I have no idea what match he watched.
38:12That's like a minus three star match.
38:14Yeah, that's extraordinary.
38:16Do you know what that is? That is Dave doesn't care.
38:18Yeah.
38:20When he was doing all those minus two star things for WCW
38:22he actually cared about wrestling at that point.
38:24He cared about, like, the product that was
38:26being put out. There's nothing to care
38:28about with this product right now.
38:30He probably, like, ah, it's two stars.
38:32Like, looked at the lineup and was like, wrote down
38:34two stars before it even happened.
38:36I wouldn't be surprised. Because it's every WWE midcard
38:38match. You put Dolph Ziggler versus Kofi
38:40Kingston on an Extreme
38:42Rules 2014.
38:44Two stars. Two and three quarter stars.
38:46Well again, this is a match of just
38:48a series of events. Yeah.
38:50But then also, one of the events
38:52was that there were no events. Yeah.
38:54Before
38:56we get into this, we did have a
38:58little bit of a discussion off mic at the end
39:00of the last episode. Yes.
39:02About the old Raka Khan match.
39:04Yes, there is that.
39:06You know. We feel this is probably slightly
39:08too high on the list.
39:10Yeah. Yeah. Do we think it should be
39:12underneath Bray in their layup? Yeah.
39:14I think it goes here. Me too.
39:16I, at the time, objected slightly
39:18to the
39:20NWO War Games match
39:22being more fun than this.
39:24I kind of get it
39:26and everything. You know, because of the
39:28RARGH! The Ultimate Warrior
39:30and the smoke. Yeah.
39:32And all the tomfoolery. No, you're right.
39:34We should put it back.
39:36But
39:38the way that it's all just kind of worked out
39:40like, this is more
39:42fun. Yeah.
39:44And this is more ridiculous
39:46than this. That's what tipped me over
39:48the edge. Yeah.
39:50And I think, actually, this
39:52match could be
39:54above, below
39:56Scott Steiner vs. Trippett. It could actually be in that gap.
39:58Potentially.
40:00Yeah, because I think I preferred
40:02this match here.
40:04The War Games match
40:06to this Chamber match. Yes.
40:08This was more boring
40:10but then it was funnier.
40:12You're absolutely right, actually.
40:14Because this is just like, this is a bit of a mess
40:16but I don't think it's a really
40:18funny mess. Yeah. Whereas this is a
40:20funny mess. Yeah, so maybe we
40:22bump that up. I think it does go in the
40:24middle there.
40:26Between War Games and
40:28Bray and LA Knight. At least this is short.
40:30Yeah. Which does count
40:32towards it.
40:34I don't know how funny it
40:36really is. No, I think it's the same.
40:38The Bray and LA Knight thing isn't
40:40totally funny. This really made me laugh.
40:42How does that look to you guys?
40:44I don't immediately hate
40:46it because I could also
40:48make an argument that it should go like right
40:50f***ing at the top.
40:52Just from sheer like, you're all
40:54supposed to be professionals. Yeah.
40:56How did you let this happen? Yeah.
40:58You know? But
41:00it's really funny.
41:02It's really funny. It's so funny when
41:04it happens. You know?
41:06Maybe it does go below Bray and LA Knight.
41:08I...
41:10Because that isn't...
41:12It is long though.
41:14It is long. There are boring sections.
41:16The bookends of it are well boring.
41:18But that section in the middle is very funny.
41:20Yeah. If it was just that section
41:22I would say yeah, it's down
41:24in this area here. But there's boring
41:26bits either side of it. Yeah.
41:28There's a boring prologue and epilogue. Yeah.
41:30I'm happy with where it is.
41:32I think you can make a
41:34solid argument
41:36in any which way. Yeah.
41:38But if that's our list
41:40through the month of February
41:422025, I'm alright with that.
41:44I think I'm okay. We may
41:46come back to that. Yeah, let us know
41:48in the comments. Let us know in the comments down below. We may come back to this.
41:50If you want to watch
41:52us watch this match with the match actually
41:54on screen and we don't get blocked by WWE
41:56Patreon.com forward slash
41:58WrestleTalk is the place to head because
42:00that is exactly where we
42:02do that. So head on over there and support
42:04us over at Patreon.com forward slash WrestleTalk
42:06where you also get a bonus and
42:08exclusive episode. It's that Triple H Scott
42:10Steiner one. Fun fact for you. And
42:12if you want to watch another one right this second
42:14here's us watch
42:16the Mountain Dew pitch black
42:18match between Bray Wyatt and
42:20LA Knight. It's been a rough
42:22run I think. Yeah, it really has. I think
42:24we could do with a fun one next time. Yeah.
42:26That'd be nice.
42:28I think if you took the sponsorship
42:30out of this and actually there
42:32He missed. He missed.
42:34Explosion. Pyro.
42:36If you took the sponsorship out of this and
42:38had it that maybe during
42:40the match at some point the lights went
42:42out and then you see the face paint and he
42:44realizes oh my god I'm
42:46I am the monster.