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00:00This is a restaurant like no other.
00:07Tell me, why is he single?
00:09I used to track absolute assholes.
00:11Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
00:12Yeah, I'm sorry too.
00:14Hello, Fred.
00:15These hopeful singletons are about to take a bold step...
00:20You ready?
00:21Yeah, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready.
00:23..into the unknown.
00:25Questions you ask on a date.
00:28For some...
00:29Shit, she's so pretty.
00:30..romance is on the horizon.
00:33Well, that was quite nice, wasn't it?
00:36But the path to love is...
00:38Oh, shit.
00:39..unpredictable.
00:40I own a dungeon.
00:41And Cupid's arrow can sometimes miss its mark.
00:46Oh, my God.
00:48Hey!
00:49That was weird.
00:51I've been with my current partner for a year.
00:54You're not pregnant, are you?
00:57No.
00:59Bad joke.
01:00His mum is also on a date that seems to meet the pattern.
01:05Hi!
01:10We make it happen, baby.
01:12Oh, that was a kiss.
01:14We make it all happen.
01:17One meal.
01:19I don't want this to end.
01:22Hi.
01:23Hi.
01:24Hi.
01:25One big question.
01:27Would you like to see each other again?
01:31Some lucky guy.
01:33If they come for me, they're going to get their money's worth.
01:41This is The First Dates Restaurant.
01:55Oh, la-la.
02:03I laugh a lot.
02:05I smile a lot as well.
02:07What's your name?
02:08Shamsa.
02:09Beautiful.
02:10It comes from an Arabic word, which means the sun.
02:13I'm not surprised, because you're dazzling me right now.
02:16Oh, thank you.
02:19She's gorgeous.
02:22She's so beautiful.
02:23I need somebody that can smile and laugh just as much as I do.
02:28When she smiles, she's very genuine.
02:30You see, she's perfect.
02:32I think I'll be looking after the table later.
02:34Yeah?
02:35Hopefully.
02:36Oh, good.
02:39For 30-year-old social activist Shamsa,
02:42the moment is right to find Mr Right.
02:45I had so much on that I didn't have the time to go to the toilet.
02:50I didn't have the time to go and pursue men.
02:53But now is a good time.
02:55Who's approaching me?
02:57I'm here waiting, sir.
02:59Come get me, please.
03:02Oh, that's nice.
03:04I want romance.
03:06That's what I want.
03:07I want to be romanticised.
03:09Is that even a word?
03:10Romanced.
03:11That's what I want.
03:12Where are you from?
03:13I live in Lancashire, Burnley.
03:15I think I'm a country girl.
03:16Oh, yeah.
03:17I grew up in a very small village in Somalia.
03:21We used to herd sheep and goats and cows.
03:24We used to milk them.
03:26That was our play, milking.
03:29So tell me, what are you looking for tonight?
03:31Someone who is very respectful to women.
03:35Poor.
03:37Handsome.
03:39Hoping to tick all Shamsa's boxes is 6ft3 Hamish.
03:44What's going on?
03:45Lovely to meet you.
03:46How are you?
03:47You're like a man mountain.
03:49Are you a sportsman?
03:51No, I'm in software.
03:53Oh, my God.
03:55Give me the tell-tale signs of if you like someone.
03:58I think, like, maybe if I...
04:00I don't know, maybe if I touch my hair
04:02or if I try to fix myself up,
04:04then that would be a great indication that I like them.
04:07Tall guy, good-looking, confident.
04:09Can't have any problem to meet the girls.
04:12Hey, look, I hope my date's display is you,
04:15How would you describe love?
04:17From my experiences so far, painful.
04:20It's difficult.
04:21There's not loads of women who are desperately
04:23waiting for a software salesman.
04:25I do like women who are fun to hang out with,
04:28confident, definitely not backwards and coming forwards
04:32with their opinions.
04:34Come with me.
04:35Cool, thanks.
04:37Et voilà .
04:38Hiya.
04:39Hi!
04:40Nice to meet you.
04:41It's lovely to meet you.
04:43I'm Amish.
04:44What's your name?
04:45Momo.
04:46Sham.
04:47Sham, nice to meet you.
04:48Sham sir.
04:49Lovely to meet you.
04:50How are you getting on?
04:51Good.
04:54Are you nervous?
04:55Yeah, a little bit.
04:56Yeah.
04:57The moment I saw you walk in, I became a little bit nervous.
05:00More relaxed now?
05:01No, a little bit more nervous.
05:03More nervous?
05:04Oh, no, that's not good.
05:05Why?
05:06I don't know.
05:07Well, you look unreal, so...
05:10You look good, too.
05:13Yeah?
05:14Works?
05:15It works.
05:16It works.
05:18Phew!
05:19First box ticks, then.
05:25How are you, coffee?
05:26I think I'm getting better every day.
05:27As long as you smile, you're away.
05:29OK.
05:30All right?
05:31I'll be watching you.
05:39Morning.
05:40You all right?
05:41Yeah, lovely.
05:43For 27-year-old Dominic,
05:45the search for love has been full of surprises.
05:49I went on a date once, and she brought three children with her.
05:55It was not what I was expecting.
05:58We had a lovely time, and I played frisbee with the children.
06:01And then, yeah, we called it a day.
06:05I love your moustache.
06:06Oh, thank you very much.
06:07Really cool.
06:08I get a lot of pride in my moustache.
06:09Yeah, it makes me feel like we are in the 70s.
06:12How many dates?
06:13One or two dates.
06:14One, I went on a date.
06:15I walked around TK Maxx.
06:16Really?
06:17Yeah, yeah.
06:18It was good fun.
06:19I enjoyed TK Maxx.
06:20Wow.
06:21I don't speak to many women,
06:23and I wouldn't approach a woman to go on a date with.
06:26Oh, look at her.
06:27She'd be like, maybe I could go.
06:28And I think, I'm going to do her head in.
06:30I'll save her the time.
06:32So I'll just carry on.
06:34And what do you do?
06:35I'm a caretaker at a secondary school.
06:38What's the best thing about being a caretaker?
06:40I get a lot of very chilled-out vibes.
06:42You do look like a fairly chilled-out kind of guy.
06:44Yeah, so I'm mostly just walking around nature and woods.
06:47Nice.
06:48Have you got a dog?
06:49I don't, but I have a tortoise.
06:50I didn't know that she was a lady when we first got her.
06:53Her name is Tyrone.
06:55I don't think I have a type.
06:58Just someone silly, like, what is going on over there?
07:01And there she is, being a numpty.
07:03I think, what are you doing?
07:05So that would be nice, I think.
07:08Dominic's date is Rebecca, who likes to live la vida loca.
07:14My friends would describe me as bonkers, crazy, spontaneous, weird.
07:21My nickname was Crazy Becky in school.
07:24Oh, my God, what am I doing?
07:27I sometimes paddleboard naked.
07:32Are these difficult shoes to walk in?
07:35I only just bought them yesterday.
07:37I don't own heels, so I'm usually sandals or trainers.
07:40Oh, my God, you must be torture.
07:42I would love to have a man that could hike up a mountain
07:46with her pots and pans and just stargaze.
07:50Someone who is, like, on my level,
07:53who understands my weirdness and accepts it, basically.
07:57Come with me.
08:01And look at that smiley face.
08:03There you are, Mr Smiley, just for you.
08:05You look lovely. Nice to meet you.
08:07Nice to meet you, too. My name's Dominic.
08:09My name's Rebecca. Rebecca, lovely to meet you, Rebecca.
08:11How are you? I think I'm good, yeah.
08:13Very excited, very, like, ooh, what a day.
08:15Like, what the hell's going on, basically?
08:17Of course. Can I get you a drink?
08:19Can I get a gin and tonic, please? Of course.
08:21Lovely. So where have you travelled from?
08:23I'm Southampton. Southampton? Yeah.
08:25I'm near a beach. I'm near a beach.
08:27Ooh, that's nice. Southend on the sea.
08:29Ooh, sounds nice. Yeah, no idea where that is.
08:32Wow.
08:34I like doing, like, adventures
08:36and nature and walking.
08:38You're, like, the same as me, then.
08:40So I was away six years.
08:42Oh, dear.
08:44Australia for one year. Ooh, that's nice.
08:46New Zealand, Fiji.
08:48Ooh, bloody hell.
08:50Bali, Singapore, basically the whole of Asia.
08:52Ooh, hello. Crikey.
08:54Have you been travelling much, then?
08:56Like, Lichtenstein
08:58is probably the nicest place I've been.
09:00Lichtenstein? Beautiful, yes.
09:02Just small and got a really nice hill.
09:04All right.
09:14Ah, mint. Thank you very much.
09:16There you go. How's the day going so far?
09:18Yeah, good, thank you. Good.
09:20It's a good first impression.
09:22Yeah, of course, first impressions count.
09:24They do. Let's see.
09:26Enjoy your drinks, guys. Thank you.
09:36So what do you do for fun?
09:38I don't know. Like, I'm really into my fitness.
09:40I can tell you're into your fitness.
09:42Do you sleep at the gym?
09:44Not every night. Not every night, OK.
09:46I stopped playing rugby a couple of years ago.
09:48I love rugby. OK.
09:50This is my love language now.
09:52I love rugby. I don't know why.
09:54Not the men in short shorts, then?
09:56No, I don't...
09:58Side eye.
10:00I played 20 years in rugby.
10:02I got a hair a lot in that.
10:04I'm not really made for that life.
10:06I'm a bit soft.
10:08I think there's, like, a misconception
10:10about the sort of people that play rugby
10:12and how they behave and how they'll treat people
10:14and all those sorts of things,
10:16which is sometimes a little unfair.
10:18So I've got your mains here.
10:20That's the salmon. Thank you very much.
10:22And then that's your sea bass.
10:24Thank you so much.
10:26This smells amazing.
10:28It smells good. And I also need to go to the toilet.
10:34I'll hold the fork.
10:38Uh...
10:40Sorry.
10:44My dad's a really good role model.
10:46He's always incredibly polite and kind
10:48and he respects everybody.
10:50OK, OK, OK.
10:52I was definitely raised to look after women.
10:54You open the door for them.
10:56Going out of your way sometimes
10:58to be excessively polite with women, maybe.
11:00Oh, my God.
11:02I need lipstick in my life.
11:04I think with the right person,
11:06like, my romantic side definitely comes out.
11:10Oh, I'm going to eat my hand.
11:16She's taking her time, isn't she?
11:18No, he seems really nice
11:20and he's funny.
11:22My stomach fright is going.
11:24Do you know?
11:26This is painful.
11:28I'm sorry about that.
11:30You're good.
11:32Ooh.
11:34Sounds good, does that?
11:36They look fantastic, don't they?
11:38Thank you very much.
11:40Thank you so much.
11:42Let me tell you something.
11:44This man is not the size that he is
11:46because he eats peanuts, right?
11:48He needs to eat and he's been looking
11:50for the last...
12:00Do you like cooking?
12:02I don't do it often.
12:04I haven't had, like, a meal
12:06in a long time.
12:08How do you eat?
12:10Like, crunchies.
12:12You live on chocolate?
12:14I could be having the worst
12:16day of my life if someone gave me a chocolate bar.
12:18Brilliant.
12:20Nothing can get me down.
12:22I've got a Kit-Kat Chunky or something.
12:24Sometimes I eat a
12:26pan au chocolat.
12:30I don't feel 27.
12:32How old do you feel?
12:34Like, nine.
12:36It's like, what is going on?
12:38A nine-year-old chocolate flick?
12:40Yeah, I am. It's bad.
12:42But it's good at the same time, isn't it?
12:44It's bloody brilliant, I think.
12:48MUSIC
12:52Do you know any Italian
12:54phrases you can teach me?
12:56Like, what do you want to know?
12:58You're beautiful.
13:02What is your dream man, then?
13:04Someone who drives.
13:06OK, that one I can do, yeah.
13:08Someone who's tall.
13:12Someone that I can have, like,
13:14an intelligent conversation with.
13:17I'm joking.
13:19No!
13:21I'm good for a good,
13:23for an intelligent conversation.
13:25I like you.
13:27I like it.
13:29How's it going?
13:31Oh, my God. Does he like me?
13:33Does he not like me?
13:35Do I like him? Do I not like him?
13:37I don't know!
13:39How are you feeling?
13:41I think I'm feeling all right, yeah.
13:43I hope she's feeling all right.
13:45I have no idea.
13:47You like her? You fancy her?
13:49Yeah, I definitely fancy her, yeah.
13:51Do you like the look of him?
13:53Yeah, no, he's beautiful.
13:59Tell me, like, about your family and stuff.
14:01I had a very, very, very interesting childhood.
14:03I'm from Somalia.
14:05I used to herd sheep
14:07and goats.
14:09And cows.
14:11I made a house out of
14:13cow poo.
14:17Does that not make the house, like, smell?
14:19Cow poo, not exactly like,
14:21ooh, love it.
14:23Yeah.
14:25You know what, let's talk about you for a little bit.
14:27For a little bit.
14:29No, no, no, I'm intrigued.
14:31You keep going.
14:35Dates have been interesting.
14:37Because usually
14:39when they
14:41find out things about me
14:43they tend to have
14:45a lot of questions.
14:47Go on.
14:49What do you know
14:51about
14:55FGM?
14:57Which is female genital mutilation.
14:59I won't lie, I'm not going to be an expert on FGM.
15:01But I know the principle of what it is
15:03and stuff like that.
15:05I don't know too much more on that.
15:07So,
15:09FGM is
15:11basically deliberately changing
15:13someone's genitalia.
15:15Removing
15:17essential bits.
15:21Pretty much almost everything
15:23is removed.
15:25I was six when it happened to me.
15:31I remember my grandma coming up to us
15:33and saying, you know, we're going to have
15:35guditan, that's what they call it.
15:37And I was
15:39frozen, so I was
15:41dragged.
15:45I can never describe
15:47the feeling of being
15:49sewn without anesthetic.
15:51Actually being cut without
15:53anesthetic and then the same wound
15:55that you've just cut being sewn together.
15:59It is a horrific
16:01thing to go through.
16:03If I can't trust my
16:05family, then
16:07what chance do I have
16:09with other people?
16:13That's intense. It is, it is.
16:15Especially for that age as well, like you don't get
16:17it probably and then as you get older
16:19I'm guessing there's a lot of resentment about
16:21that situation and the experience you had to go
16:23through.
16:27Just
16:29very emotionally damaged.
16:31You know, if you don't
16:33heal from it and you don't reprogram your mind
16:37it's a very hard place to live
16:39and I lived there for a very long time. It's not great.
16:43What is the
16:45logic behind that?
16:47Is that a religious thing
16:49or like to stop you
16:51having
16:53partners? Men used to say
16:55back then that they wouldn't
16:57marry a woman who is uncut.
17:01They do it as well
17:03because they're trying to stop sex before marriage.
17:05Prevent it.
17:07Purity is another one.
17:09Only when I came here
17:11is when I started
17:13to realise
17:15that maybe what happened
17:17to me wasn't right.
17:19Having FGM
17:21and dating
17:25it was very scary for me.
17:27Depending on how you react
17:29I will make a decision from that.
17:31Instead of saying
17:33because of my FGM
17:35no one will find me attractive
17:37I say actually I am a fine
17:39ass woman
17:41and any man would be lucky to have me.
17:45Are you
17:47glass half full rather than glass half empty now?
17:49Yeah.
17:51I survived.
17:59Are you on any of the apps then?
18:01I'm on them all.
18:03Yeah I am.
18:05I have a little swipe every now and then
18:07but I'm rubbish at them. I'm awful.
18:09I think that is my biggest downfall
18:11probably.
18:13I've had one relationship. We were together for five years.
18:15I kind of
18:17saw it as she would be
18:19the one and that was it.
18:23I just never thought it would ever end.
18:25I never thought it would and even when it did
18:27end I thought she'll be back.
18:29Five minutes.
18:31Then I thought oh maybe tomorrow.
18:33Maybe next week and maybe a month
18:35and it just never did.
18:37She was very much on a different
18:39path to that and wanting to
18:41experience new things and
18:43just not with me.
18:45I was
18:47rock bottom.
18:49Just thought
18:51definitely something wrong with me.
18:53And it made me
18:55not
18:57like myself.
18:59Now I can
19:01appreciate it and I am grateful that it happened
19:03but yeah worst day ever.
19:05I was with someone for a year and a half in New Zealand
19:07and I flew him over
19:09and spent like three thousand pounds on a visa
19:11for him to be able to work
19:13in the UK but he only lasted
19:15two weeks. Didn't like UK, went back
19:17and haven't seen him since.
19:19What are we like?
19:21No.
19:23This
19:25is Brocard, a musician
19:27and artist searching for
19:29a new creative outlet.
19:31Everything in my life is like
19:33an art project. Like it's ridiculous.
19:35Even like elements of how you dress
19:37it's part of who I am.
19:39This is unbelievable.
19:41Look at this dress. Thank you.
19:43Lovely to meet you. What's your name please?
19:45Brocard. Oh interesting. Tell me what
19:47do you do for a living? I'm a singer.
19:49A singer and a songwriter.
19:51What type of music do you...
19:53It's rock music but it's a little bit like orchestral.
20:13And if your love life
20:15was a song. Oh gosh.
20:17Life is a roller coaster
20:19not the Rona Keating one, the Aerosmith one.
20:21There we are.
20:23Merlin, we look after you.
20:25Thank you very much.
20:27What would you like to drink?
20:29Can you do like a corpse revisor?
20:31I've been single
20:33for around six months.
20:35I didn't realise how
20:37emotionally draining that relationship was
20:39until I was out of it.
20:41I can't be bothered with all the games.
20:43I hate games. My life choices are terrible.
20:45I need help.
20:47How are you feeling about things today?
20:49I'm quite nervous because it's my first
20:51date in a very long time.
20:53How long have you been single?
20:55A few months now.
20:57I don't know if I actually have
20:59a specific type.
21:01I'm completely happy when I'm creating music.
21:03It would be nice if my
21:05partner had an understanding of that
21:07world.
21:09Brocard's date is James,
21:11a fellow musician whose love life
21:13is yet to hit the right notes.
21:15We were talking about first dates.
21:17I miss my train so I end up
21:19late. Maybe my heart will
21:21float on high like a dove. Maybe I'll find
21:23someone who is my soul mate.
21:25And then it doesn't matter because I arrive so late.
21:27Nice to meet you, James.
21:29How are you? You good?
21:31I've been single for
21:33about six months now.
21:35I don't really have a type. I like people that
21:37are kind of passionate, artistic,
21:39work in the same way as me.
21:41I find that a big turn on.
21:43Thank you. Hi, nice to meet you.
21:45I'm Brocard. Hi, I'm James.
21:47Hi. How are you?
21:49Yeah, I'm good, thank you.
21:51What would you like?
21:53I'll have a whiskey, please.
21:55There you go, a good solid drink.
21:57Yeah, yeah.
21:59I like a good whiskey. What are you having?
22:01I've had a corpse reviver.
22:03A corpse reviver?
22:05Yeah, I've literally been sitting here sipping it
22:07and it's almost gone.
22:09I need to slow down a little bit.
22:11It absolutely can make you hallucinate, can't it?
22:13Well, hopefully not.
22:15So what do you do for fun then?
22:17What are your hobbies and interests?
22:19I don't know, I love travelling and stuff like that.
22:21Weird and wonderful locations and stuff.
22:23Yeah, I like things that are a little bit
22:25quirky. Where have you been?
22:27I just got back from
22:29Mexico, which is kind of
22:31interesting. I'd love to go for the Day of the Dead.
22:33Oh, yeah.
22:35Well, I am going to take you to your table
22:37now.
22:39Crikey, Blimey.
22:41Look at that. Wow, it's green.
22:43That is very green.
22:45Wow.
22:51My God, I keep kicking you.
22:53I'm sorry. Oh, I thought you were playing footsie.
22:55Was I?
22:59So you've never been to Bath before?
23:01I did, actually, many years ago, yeah.
23:03Oh, you did? I filmed a music video here.
23:05Oh, really? A music video that you
23:07were in, or a music... Yeah,
23:09I was rapping. Oh, OK,
23:11rap. I'm a singer.
23:13Yeah, and songwriter.
23:15I kind of live quite a creative life.
23:17It's such a massive part of who I am.
23:19Oh, awesome.
23:23There we are.
23:25Oh, this is so cute.
23:27Isn't it amazing?
23:29This is nice.
23:31So, would I
23:33tick your number of boxes this year?
23:37I would say so.
23:39Yeah, you tick a lot of mine.
23:41Really? Yeah. Aww.
23:43I'll just get married now, yeah?
23:45Hurry up.
23:47Put up a ring on it.
23:49Whenever you're ready.
23:53I'm pleased.
23:55Oh, I'm as tall
23:57as Scott.
23:59So, how are we doing it?
24:01I'll pick the first one. Aww.
24:03That is so cute.
24:05Absolute gents
24:07in every way.
24:09He's a good-looking man,
24:11mature.
24:13He took my
24:15FGM
24:17very well.
24:19He
24:21made me feel comfortable.
24:23And I'm
24:25kind of grateful for that.
24:27Are you
24:29shy?
24:31What happened?
24:33No reason.
24:35That is not the
24:37response I was expecting.
24:39I'm just
24:41in a really good mood today.
24:43Why?
24:45I don't know.
24:47Maybe it has something to do with you.
24:49Really?
24:51Would you like
24:53to see each other again?
24:55I'll go if you really want.
24:57I'll go if you want.
24:59Yeah, I think so, yeah.
25:01Me too.
25:03Yeah, I'd like to get to know you more.
25:05Me too.
25:07What's your plans
25:09for the rest of the day?
25:11Nothing.
25:13Yeah.
25:15The fact that
25:17you waited to eat,
25:19well done.
25:21Self-restraint.
25:23Thank you so much.
25:25Take care, love.
25:27They are into each other.
25:29100%, right?
25:31Lucky man.
25:33I thought you were super interesting.
25:35I respect that you're so open.
25:37Let me turn this way.
25:41Maybe we stick to
25:43main roads and nowhere with cobbles
25:45in those heels, perhaps.
25:47I can go on your back.
25:49You can carry me.
25:53Yeah.
25:57Can you do any accents?
25:59Hello there.
26:01Hello.
26:03I couldn't even imagine going to Australia.
26:05The moths are incredible.
26:07Like,
26:09I'm not into that, I don't think.
26:11I've got the huge phobia
26:13of moths and butterflies.
26:15Really?
26:17Yeah, if a butterfly comes near me,
26:19I'm gone.
26:21Something I've done that's quite crazy.
26:23Scuba dived with great whites.
26:25Oh, wow.
26:27Would you do that?
26:29Can't swim.
26:31Can't swim?
26:33Can't swim, no.
26:35I could bob about.
26:37No, I would just...
26:39I bob through life.
26:41You bob through life?
26:43That's what I do.
26:45Interesting.
26:51Hello, young man.
26:53Hello, Fred.
26:55I can see you've got that zest for life.
26:57My God,
26:59this looks crazy.
27:01You're living your dream with your chocolate.
27:09What do you do for a living?
27:11I'm a youth worker.
27:13Okay, cool.
27:15Yeah, youth worker.
27:17What do you do for a living?
27:19I'm a youth worker.
27:21I use music as one of the tools.
27:23I run an ADHD consultancy
27:25and training company on the side.
27:27Do you have ADHD?
27:29I do, yeah.
27:31At what point in your life
27:33were you diagnosed?
27:35I was diagnosed really young.
27:37It was really apparent.
27:39Some days as a child,
27:41I slept one hour in 24 hours.
27:43I was really hyperactive,
27:45very different,
27:47I didn't like getting all those types of things.
27:49Learning how to deal with that
27:51and fit into society was difficult.
27:53We grew up in relative poverty.
27:55There was a lot going on at home,
27:57negative relationships.
27:59My mum really tried her best,
28:01working three jobs and that,
28:03and we still didn't have any money for food often.
28:05I haven't had the easiest of lives.
28:07Just having ADHD, I was demonised at school and college.
28:09Myself and my other brother
28:11really got into music
28:13and were targeted by youth workers to develop that.
28:15Getting into the music
28:17and arts to express that
28:19was a real positive thing.
28:21I didn't fit in at all.
28:23I've never had an official diagnosis of anything like that.
28:25I do find most musicians
28:27are probably neurodiverse,
28:29from my experience.
28:31There's probably a truth in that, I guess.
28:33I think I've never considered myself
28:35to be typically normal.
28:37Even when I was five or six
28:39in the playground,
28:41I'd literally run off, hide in the woods
28:43and I'd go into my own little world
28:45and write a poem, write a song
28:47and there's a sadness to that.
28:49I've had periods
28:51where I've literally been,
28:53what are people going to think of me?
28:55And it is so debilitating
28:57to get to the stage.
28:59It's probably age as you get older as well,
29:01to get to the stage where you're like,
29:03well actually, if you don't like me, that's fine.
29:05So...
29:07Light topics!
29:09What do you look for in a relationship then?
29:11I think I need a good,
29:13solid, honest, decent person.
29:15Yeah, it's the first date
29:17in a little while.
29:19I was going to sound really weird,
29:21but I just...
29:23Weird is good, don't worry.
29:25I had a paranormal experience
29:27with a spirit.
29:29I fell in love with a ghost.
29:31Yeah.
29:33Which led to a relationship.
29:41Hoping to reignite some romance
29:43is former firefighter, Ian.
29:45So I tell you, you know,
29:47you must have been a hit with the ladies
29:49as a firefighter, surely.
29:51The ladies swoon?
29:53No, I don't think so.
29:55I think women traditionally think
29:57we're quite brave and heroic,
29:59but I'm sadly married for 41 years
30:01and I didn't flirt with anybody
30:03I didn't need to, only with my wife.
30:05I married my wife not long after I became a firefighter.
30:07How did you meet your wife?
30:09On a blind date.
30:11You're kidding.
30:13Oh, that's brilliant.
30:15We've got to make this two for two, haven't we?
30:17In the back of my mind, I'm thinking,
30:19hey, you never know, lightning might strike twice.
30:21And so what's your type?
30:23My other type is that I suppose she'd have to be
30:25adventurous, like travelling.
30:27The most important thing of all is to find
30:29somebody who's good fun, who likes a laugh.
30:35Somebody would need to be very young at heart
30:37and they'd need to be pretty fit as well
30:39to be able to keep up with me.
30:41Hi.
30:43I'm Coral.
30:47This dancing queen
30:49is Coral,
30:51who's hoping that tonight
30:53she'll feel the earth move.
30:55In the earth lies
30:57two tectonic plates
30:59and they slowly come together.
31:01When they come together,
31:03energy happens.
31:05And I've discovered
31:07within me how to find my tectonic plates.
31:09When you look this good,
31:11you've got to take your time.
31:13Just nice and easy.
31:15I think I defy
31:17the stereotypical 73-year-old.
31:19My cup is always full.
31:21Not even half full,
31:23always full.
31:25Are you ready to meet your date?
31:27I am.
31:29Come with me.
31:31When I see someone that I'm attracted to,
31:33it gets my...
31:35it gets my juices going.
31:37It gets...
31:39It gets my heart fluttering.
31:41Ian, you're in luck.
31:43Here we are.
31:45Oh, wonderful to meet you.
31:47You too. You look fantastic.
31:49You look stunning.
31:51You're just to impress.
31:53Oh, wonderful. Thank you.
31:55I'm Ian, by the way. You are?
31:57Oh, I'm Coral.
31:59Coral, I brought you a little gift.
32:01Thank you, gentlemen.
32:03You're wonderful.
32:07Oh, wonderful.
32:09You're just gorgeous.
32:15Do you have a career?
32:17I'm retired.
32:19I was a nurse.
32:21You were a nurse?
32:23Yes. And what did you do?
32:25I was a firefighter.
32:27Firefighters and nurses
32:29Yes.
32:31My wife is a nurse.
32:33Oh.
32:35Is or was?
32:37Was.
32:41Do I wipe my mouth with this?
32:43Yeah. That's what it's for.
32:45I didn't know what it was for.
32:47Really? It goes on your lap?
32:49Yeah, I didn't know.
32:51They're posh, aren't they?
32:53Yeah.
32:55I'll take that home.
32:57I had a lot of the day.
32:59What do you ask a lady?
33:01That's what I was thinking.
33:03She asked me a question.
33:05I was thinking, God, that's a good question.
33:07Wish I'd thought of that question.
33:09I'm more than happy to pay for the bill.
33:11No, let's go half.
33:13I've had a nice time, regardless of anything else.
33:15It's just nice that you've been nice.
33:17So I'll be more than happy to pay.
33:19You've been very nice, too.
33:23Very pretty. Beautiful.
33:25Maybe a bit too good for me, is what I felt.
33:27Yeah.
33:33Would you like to see each other again?
33:37I would like to see you again, I think.
33:39Yeah?
33:41I would, yeah.
33:43I mean, I would like to see you again outside,
33:45but as a friend more.
33:47I'm probably a bit too crazy for you, I think.
33:49OK, yeah, OK.
33:51I'm a bit more of a wild child,
33:53or a loose wire, basically.
33:55But you did nothing wrong.
33:57No, I appreciate it.
33:59Thank you very much.
34:01Keep smiling, because your smile is great.
34:05Oh, it was really lovely to see you.
34:07Lovely to see you.
34:09Have the best time.
34:11Take care.
34:13Bye.
34:15I feel silly, because I...
34:17Yeah, I just don't...
34:19Oh, I don't want to cry.
34:21I just don't feel good
34:23in myself
34:25on the outside.
34:29I feel like I have a lot to give
34:31to someone,
34:33but it's just trying to show them
34:35how...
34:37that you can, but
34:39I struggle with that. It's hard.
34:41It's hard to show someone that, but
34:43I've definitely made a lot of progress today, I think.
34:45I think I've done well.
34:47I feel proud of myself for that.
34:49Yeah.
35:03I hope I haven't scared
35:05you too much.
35:07It's normally me scaring other people.
35:11Your ex is no longer
35:13with us. So how did you meet, then?
35:15Don't worry about that.
35:17It wasn't really something I was looking for or asking for.
35:19OK. He just kind of, like,
35:21burst into my bedroom and kind of, like,
35:23sent this massive burning sensation in my heart.
35:27I've never been, like, a ghost hunter
35:29or someone who, like, does Ouija board.
35:31Like, I'm not sort of sitting there with, like,
35:33saying, ghosts, come and find me.
35:35But I just kind of, like, thought, like,
35:37I wanted to be open to it
35:39and not, like, shut it out immediately.
35:41It was a really weird four or five months.
35:43OK.
35:45I wanted to know what this spirit wanted from me.
35:47Quite quickly, I kind of realised
35:49that it wasn't a good idea.
35:51I even had to, like, call in,
35:53like, an exorcist.
35:55So you don't...
35:57You do believe, or you're intrigued,
35:59or you're not sure.
36:01I believe in... I believe in something.
36:03I think it does sound...
36:05If you are sceptical and you don't believe in ghosts,
36:07it does sound bloody crazy, and I...
36:09I've witnessed a lot.
36:11You know, more poltergeist stuff
36:13than natural apparitions
36:15or anything like that.
36:17Just to, like,
36:19put you clear in what I do.
36:21So I do paranormal videos.
36:23I research the kind of ghosts, and we investigate it.
36:25Last weekend,
36:27I dived into a cave to search for
36:29a ghost of a dead witch, so...
36:31That's what I do.
36:33That's right up my street.
36:35OK.
36:37There is your salmon.
36:39And that is your burger.
36:41Oh, yeah, that looks lovely.
36:43Where's my tissue?
36:45I can grab you a tissue if you want.
36:47Please.
36:49The gentleman always comes prepared.
36:51Oh, good thing I have a gallant man
36:53with me.
36:57It's not being used.
36:59I will treasure this.
37:03So do you like travelling?
37:05Mm.
37:07You haven't travelled much to Europe,
37:09have you?
37:11I have a camper van.
37:13Oh, you have a camper van. Lovely.
37:15And I go off around Europe in it.
37:17My goodness, you're adventurous.
37:19It was Pat
37:21who wanted to go travelling.
37:23She said,
37:25what I wouldn't want to happen is just keep working
37:27and one of us should die.
37:29I said, I think we should make a plan to retire.
37:31So we decided
37:33we were going to buy a camper van.
37:35We used it twice before we discovered
37:37that she was terminally ill.
37:43Everybody used to say we were like that.
37:45We were soulmates, no doubt about it.
37:49My wife got cancer
37:51and she died very quickly.
37:53Oh.
37:55Do you miss that relationship?
37:57I do, yeah, yeah.
37:59I was very happily married.
38:01Yeah.
38:05Yeah.
38:07None of us know how long we've got.
38:09Pat was the love of my life
38:11for 41 years.
38:13But the time has passed
38:15and I feel ready to go out there and
38:17look for love again.
38:19I decided that
38:21I wasn't going to become a victim.
38:23I wasn't going to have people
38:25saying, oh, poor old, he lost his wife,
38:27he's never going to see her.
38:29I suppose I reinvented myself, really.
38:31My wife wouldn't have wanted me to sit in a car
38:33and move.
38:35We talked about these things when she was ill, you know.
38:37So I gave myself a good talking to,
38:39as they say, and sort of like
38:41went out in the world and sort of like
38:43got used to travelling on my own.
38:45Oh, Liam, that's beautiful.
38:47You're a man
38:49after my own heart.
38:51I wish you could take me on your trips.
38:53LAUGHTER
39:04Is that polished?
39:06No. I think I need to go back
39:08to the optician.
39:12Do you read?
39:14I don't read an awful lot.
39:16I'll tell you why.
39:18My eyesteps are very tired.
39:20I have a bit of glaucoma.
39:22Really? Yeah.
39:24This is unbelievable. Do you have glaucoma too?
39:26I've got glaucoma and I'm having an operation
39:28on Monday. Are you?
39:30Yeah, yeah. So is your life
39:32like Greg's drugs and sausage rolls then?
39:34What's the sausage roll?
39:36Do you not go to Greg's sausage roll?
39:38LAUGHTER
39:40I do like a sausage roll.
39:42LAUGHTER
39:46Are we done with the food?
39:48Yes, I've finished, yes, yes.
39:50I'm just going to drop the bill.
39:54Are you divorced or a widow?
39:56I'm divorced.
39:58I've been divorced since 1984.
40:00Oh, my God, that's a long time
40:02since I've been divorced.
40:04I'm lonely at home very often.
40:06I tell myself I'm not lonely
40:08and I find things to do.
40:10And I ask Alexa,
40:12Alexa, play some African drums.
40:14And then I start
40:16to find my rhythm
40:18and I could be there for an hour
40:20just dancing.
40:24Just me alone in the house, you know.
40:26But I'm dancing with a purpose.
40:28And that takes me out
40:30of my loneliness
40:32because I'm into me.
40:36But I do yearn to have
40:38a caring, understanding,
40:40passionate...
40:42one-to-one relationship.
40:44Yeah.
40:46Are you a passionate person, though?
40:48I don't know.
40:50I probably have been in the past.
40:52Have you lost that passion?
40:54I don't suppose I have.
40:56I don't suppose I have.
40:58It's just maybe well hidden.
41:00Ask me that question.
41:02OK, then.
41:04Are you a passionate person?
41:06Yeah.
41:08I thought you probably are.
41:10I'm fiery.
41:12I have a lot in me to give.
41:16I've always said to myself
41:18some lucky guy,
41:20if they come for me,
41:22they're going to get their money's worth.
41:26Do you believe in...
41:28Well, you're probably going to have the same answer,
41:30but do you believe in alien life form?
41:32I'm interested in
41:34finding out answers to things,
41:36whether it's completely logical
41:38or whether it's something that science
41:40doesn't have an answer for yet.
41:42Yeah.
41:44Yeah, I think sometimes the whole point of it
41:46is to test your ideas of reality.
41:48Reality is nothing but a
41:50individual experience.
41:52This is pretty heavy as well.
41:54You talk about something light
41:56and now we're talking about deep,
41:58deep meanings of life.
42:02She's a very attractive lady.
42:04She's very beautiful.
42:06I've never experienced
42:08or met anyone that's experienced that.
42:10I really enjoyed it.
42:12Hi.
42:14How would we like to settle the bill?
42:16Um...
42:20Do you want me to split it with you?
42:26He was the perfect gentleman.
42:28He didn't judge me in any way.
42:30The fact that he had experienced paranormal activity himself
42:32was helpful in that situation.
42:34He wasn't offended by it.
42:36He was intrigued by it
42:38and he allowed me to try and explain the situation
42:40and that was exciting.
42:42Thank you very much.
42:46So,
42:48would you like to see each other again?
42:50What?
42:52The dreaded question.
42:54I'm not answering this first, by the way.
42:58I'd like to see you again, definitely,
43:00to explore.
43:02Thank you very much.
43:06Thank you very much.
43:08I think you were very lovely
43:10and it was really nice to meet you
43:12but I don't feel like there was that...
43:14Chemistry?
43:16Yeah, there wasn't that pull
43:18I don't feel I'm your type, am I?
43:20I don't know if you are, to be honest.
43:22I think, you know,
43:24we could go ghost hunting as friends
43:26but I just feel like I don't want to go
43:28ghost hunting.
43:30Maybe I'll see you again when I die.
43:32Yes, you never know.
43:34Take care.
43:36Bye.
43:38Yeah, it was different.
43:40OK.
43:42It definitely added to my repertoire of
43:44interesting incidents in the constant
43:46invocations of James, didn't it?
44:16This is beautiful.
44:22That was a kiss.
44:26I've seen a lot of moments
44:28but that was very special.
44:30What a match.
44:36We have so much in common,
44:38it's unbelievable.
44:40I found
44:42a very special person
44:44I found
44:46a heartfelt connection.
44:48You're a rascal.
44:54Hi.
44:56Hi.
44:58You know, Ian,
45:00you only live once.
45:02How do you make it memorable?
45:04Yeah, yeah, absolutely, yeah.
45:06Would you like to see each other again?
45:08Would I like to see
45:10Ian again?
45:12I most certainly would.
45:14You're a beautiful person
45:16and I'm happy to have met you.
45:18I'm glad I met you as well.
45:20Yes, yeah, yeah, you were very attractive
45:22and very glamorous
45:24and very interesting to talk to
45:26and I had a great time.
45:28You know what I love about
45:30meeting you? It was the way you greeted me.
45:32Oh.
45:34Beautiful smile, looking me straight in the eyes.
45:36That showed how warm
45:38a person you are.
45:40Yeah.
45:42Have fun, guys.
45:44Bye.
45:50I had a brilliant day. Thank you.
45:52Oh, yeah, it was really good. I really enjoyed it.
46:10Support information for the issues raised can be found online at Channel4.com
46:40The Wedding Day Worries
46:42set in next Monday night, feeling
46:44overwhelmed down under.
46:46Maths Oz starts at nine
46:48on E4. Hit on Channel4
46:50next. It's 24 hours in A&E.