Judge Roy Bean - S1E23: The Katchina Doll
30min | Western | TV Series (1955– )
Storts and Hurley are holding hostage a doll that brings good luck to a Mexican village. Mayor Gonzales for aid from the Judge and Taggert who have no jurisdiction across the border. Letty agrees to help lure the criminal back to Texas.
Stars: Edgar Buchanan, Jack Buetel, Jackie Loughery
30min | Western | TV Series (1955– )
Storts and Hurley are holding hostage a doll that brings good luck to a Mexican village. Mayor Gonzales for aid from the Judge and Taggert who have no jurisdiction across the border. Letty agrees to help lure the criminal back to Texas.
Stars: Edgar Buchanan, Jack Buetel, Jackie Loughery
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Take me home, take me home to the land of the peggles.
00:09Near that stream, let me dream beneath the sky.
00:17This old heart keeps on beatin', repeatin' fond echoes
00:25of the brave and the bold ridin' high.
00:46Hold up, Stuart! This horse is about ready to drop in its tracks.
00:50It's only a couple more jumps to Mexico. We're safe there. Come on!
00:55They're heading for the border!
01:03You're right, Judge. Let's go!
01:09Now be careful going across. There might be quicksand in there.
01:25Too late, Judge! Too late!
01:27We're not going to let them get away, are we, Judge?
01:29Greetings from Mexico! Aren't you coming over?
01:35If we can't follow them, they'll cross the border into Mexico.
01:38That's out of our jurisdiction. You know that, Judge.
01:41They'll be crossing the border again one of these days, coming this way.
01:44When they do, we'll be waiting here to give them a welcome home.
01:47I'm not very good at waiting, Judge.
01:55You boys, head out and find us a place to camp.
02:02Hey, what's that thing over there?
02:05It's a horse.
02:07It's a horse?
02:09It's a horse!
02:11It's a horse!
02:13It's a horse!
02:15It's a horse!
02:17It's a horse!
02:20Hey, what's that thing over there?
02:23Looks like a doll.
02:25That's a funny place for a doll.
02:27Must mean something to these people around here.
02:29Yeah, Indians. They really go in for that kind of stuff.
02:32But mouth means more to me. I'm hungry.
02:34There's a canteen over there. Let's eat.
02:50Hola, amigos. Americanos, eh?
02:53Welcome to Aguanoche, en Mexico.
02:56Por favor, siéntense. Tenga la bondad de sentarse.
02:59Aguanoche, eh?
03:01Samba.
03:03Our neighbors from the United States are always welcome here.
03:06When they have friendship for us.
03:09Señores de pistolas, they make me nervous.
03:13Well, now, ain't that a shame?
03:15Yeah, well, it's a shame.
03:17Well, now, ain't that a shame?
03:19Yeah, we feel real undressed without our guts.
03:21Besides, we only use them to kill people with.
03:24Señores, I want you to know that I'm the alcalde here in Aguanoche.
03:29As you say, I am the mayor.
03:32You're the mayor?
03:34This must be some verb.
03:36You know, this is gonna be something different.
03:38How's that?
03:39The mayor here is gonna bring our food.
03:41Señores.
03:43Come on, mayor.
03:44Rustle us up some grub, some chili and beans.
03:46Move!
03:47Por favor, señores.
03:49I want you to know, in Aguanoche there is a law about the pistolas.
03:52They should be left outside.
03:54You gonna put us in jail, mayor?
03:56We wouldn't like that.
04:02Well, it's not an important law.
04:04I will get food.
04:08I've never seen anybody move so fast.
04:17That's more like it, man.
04:22Hola, mayor.
04:24What do you want, señor?
04:26Come back here.
04:28What is it, señor?
04:30It's food. Not bad.
04:32You're a pretty good cook.
04:33Muchas gracias, señor. Thank you.
04:35Don't you have a handle, mayor?
04:37A what?
04:38A name.
04:39Oh, si, si. I even call Juan Gonzalez.
04:42Juan, we might stay in town for a few days.
04:44Like to know something about it.
04:46No, señores. You will not like Aguanoche.
04:48It is a very bad place.
04:50Snakes, a spider, biggest horses, you know.
04:53Arañas, pachonas, horrible.
04:55What's the story on that doll out there?
04:57Doll?
04:58Oh, you mean the casino doll.
05:00There is a casino doll, señores.
05:02What's it stand for?
05:03It stands for?
05:05It means something, doesn't it?
05:06Oh, yes.
05:07The casino doll, señores, it is very old.
05:10And how do you say, it is the good luck of our village.
05:12Oh, and that's it.
05:13That's why the people keep touching it.
05:16Si, they have witches, so they touch the casino
05:19for a good harvest, to have a strong son,
05:22for many, many things.
05:24We could use some luck, Hurley.
05:26I think we ought to take the doll with us.
05:28No, señores.
05:29The casino will bring you no luck.
05:31It isn't worth anything, señores.
05:33Except to you folks here, is that it?
05:35Si, señor.
05:39Come on, Hurley. I got an idea.
05:43Let's go.
05:51You know, I really think a lot of that thing.
05:53It's going to be real tough on them when we kidnap it.
05:56Kidnap it? What for?
05:57That doll's got a lot of power, Hurley.
05:59Why don't you touch it and wish for enough money
06:01to get us to Arizona?
06:03You're crazy.
06:04Am I?
06:05Suppose we take it and hold it for ransom,
06:07say a thousand pesos.
06:09Who would pay it?
06:11John, all of them, they chip in.
06:13They need that doll real bad, don't they?
06:16Stuart, you got a mind like a bear trap.
06:25Get out of here.
06:31Vamos.
06:34Hey, you stand back, boy.
06:36You wouldn't want to take yourself a permanent siesta,
06:38would you, Mr. Mann?
06:42It's a funny-looking thing, but they like it.
06:46Senores, you are under arrest.
06:50We got the doll, and you don't get it back
06:52until we get a thousand pesos.
06:54You savvy that?
06:56A thousand pesos?
06:57Mi madre, I have never seen that much money in all my life.
07:02You're the mayor.
07:03Collect it, make up a new tax or something.
07:06I don't care how you get it,
07:07but you got 24 hours to get it or there won't be no doll.
07:11I don't try that again.
07:13Senor, please.
07:15I just assure you we mean what we say.
07:40Jeff, do you want to take me to the dance in Mezcal City Friday night?
08:03Sure, I'll take you to the dance.
08:04Good.
08:07Oh, and here comes Juan Gonzalez.
08:10Let's go.
08:22Buenos dias, senorita.
08:23Hello, Juan.
08:24Good morning, Juan.
08:25Hola, senor Jeff.
08:26Is George, he's here?
08:27Yes, he's inside.
08:28I must talk to him.
08:29We are in great trouble.
08:31Well, come on in then.
08:34Uncle Roy, this is Juan.
08:36Buenos dias, senor George.
08:37Hello, Juan.
08:38What'd they do down in Aguinoche?
08:39Get smart and run you out of town?
08:41Senor George, there is trouble in Aguinoche.
08:43We need your help.
08:49Now just take it easy, Juan.
08:51Now tell me, what's the trouble?
08:53Two bandidos americanos have come to our village.
08:56They have guns.
08:57They have threatened.
08:58And now they have taken our casino down.
09:00What'd they take your casino down for?
09:02These bandidos demand a thousand pesos
09:04or they will never give it back.
09:06I can imagine so much money, senor George.
09:09But you will come to Aguinoche, see?
09:11They will be afraid of the great George Bean.
09:15I'm sorry, Juan.
09:17I can't help you.
09:19As long as those two men stay below the border,
09:21I can't touch them.
09:22It says so right here in the statutes of the state of Texas.
09:24I've just been looking it up.
09:25I can't touch them.
09:26But, Uncle Roy, Juan's people are in real trouble.
09:30Can't you do something about it?
09:32I have no authority.
09:35Without the casino down,
09:37my people will have nothing but bad luck.
09:39There will be despair.
09:41There must be something we can do to help, Judge.
09:44Not as law enforcement officers.
09:46But we can go down there and talk to those two as private citizens.
09:50That's right.
09:52Let's just take a little trip down there.
09:54Hand me the gun, lady.
09:58Come on, Juan.
10:01That George, he's a wonderful man.
10:04I know he'll do the best he can, Juan.
10:06Now you better hurry.
10:07Thank you, Miss.
10:08See you later.
10:14Juan back yet?
10:15Not yet, sir.
10:16He's been gone quite a while.
10:18Where'd you say he went?
10:20Don't be so rough on her, Hurley.
10:23She told you before he went out to raise our money for us.
10:26I'd rather see you around here than Juan anyhow.
10:29You are a bad man.
10:50Come on, sit down with me.
10:52I do not wish to.
10:54I do not wish to.
10:55Oh, but I...
10:59Well, if it isn't his honor, Judge Bean.
11:02Welcome to El Nocho.
11:04You too, Deputy.
11:06Came down here to have a little talk with you, Stewart.
11:08Well, there's nothing like good company, I always say.
11:11Sit down, Judge.
11:13Food! Food, Mayor!
11:15Come on, serve your customers.
11:17What do you fellas want?
11:19Like the judge said, we want to have a talk with you.
11:23Ain't a judge on this side of the border.
11:26That's right.
11:28We're here strictly as private citizens.
11:31Well, now, ain't that nice?
11:34What'd you want to talk about, Judge?
11:36About the kachina doll.
11:38We're here to see that you give it back.
11:41And they're going to do that as private citizens.
11:44You're wasting your time, Judge.
11:47Disappointed in you, Stewart.
11:49On our side of the line, you're nothing but a cheap outlaw.
11:53Down here, you're less than that.
11:55You're just a common thief.
11:57Why, you mess...
12:05Get over against that wall.
12:19All right, on your feet.
12:29Senores, you are the best private citizens we have ever seen in Aguanoche.
12:34Bravo, senores. Olé.
12:36Now, all our troubles with them will be over.
12:39Well, aren't you sure about that, Juan?
12:41I'm sure.
12:43I'm sure.
12:45I'm sure.
12:47Well, aren't you sure about that, Juan?
12:49We haven't got the doll back yet.
12:51That is right, senores, Judge.
12:53Boy, they will give it back to us now.
12:56You don't get the doll until we get the money for it.
12:59If you think this makes any difference, you're crazy.
13:01We got the doll hidden where nobody could find it.
13:03You better play it smart, Starks.
13:05Give back the doll before it's too late.
13:06And supposing I don't?
13:08What are you going to do about it?
13:09Beat it up again?
13:11That won't get your doll.
13:13So you want a thousand pesos for the doll, is that it?
13:16Now, was it?
13:17It ought to cost you two thousand.
13:19If we don't get the money pretty quick, we'll smash the doll to bits.
13:22All right, we'll think it over.
13:26Come on, Jeff, we're going back to Langtree.
13:32Here, Juan, you give them back their guns after we're gone.
13:34Senor Judge, you will do something.
13:36You must do something.
13:38You just have patience, Juan. You just sit tight.
13:40We'll do something.
13:47Judge, those two men just still have that doll.
13:50How are we going to get away from them?
13:52I've got an idea.
13:54What kind of an idea?
13:55This Starks has got a weakness for pretty women.
13:57What about it?
13:58I'm going to use that weakness to get back this kachina doll.
14:16Let's go.
14:46Come on.
15:12Oh, Lenny, come in here.
15:15You're back, Uncle Roy.
15:16What happened down there with the kachina doll?
15:18We're still working on it, honey.
15:20What do you think of this?
15:22Oh, it's gorgeous, Uncle Roy.
15:24Wrap it around, you'll see how it looks.
15:37This is beautiful, Uncle Roy.
15:45I would be delighted to dance with you, Senora.
15:48But will it not be the scandal of all Madrid?
15:55Hey, what's going on here?
15:57Hey, Jeff, what do you think of her?
16:00Looks pretty fancy.
16:01Hey, honey, make sure you do a Spanish accent.
16:04I am Doña Maria Villanova, Senora.
16:07Come with me to the garden.
16:09I will show you the beauty of the stars and the moon.
16:13And perhaps...
16:19Cuter than a jumping bean, but what's this all about?
16:22We're going to set a little trap for Storch and Hurley.
16:25The lady is going to be the bait.
16:27Wait a minute, I don't like it.
16:29This ought to be a man's job.
16:31Don't worry, you're going to be in on it too, boy.
16:36These men are very bad hombres.
16:38You have to be very careful.
16:40Here they come now.
16:44Hey, look at that.
16:47Watch yourself, we've got to be careful.
16:54My name's Storch, what's yours?
17:00I am Doña Maria Villanova, Senor.
17:04I'm glad to meet you, Doña Maria.
17:06You live around here?
17:07My hacienda, what you call it, the big state.
17:11It is a few miles from here, Senor.
17:15Who's she?
17:16This is my dueña.
17:18She watches everything I do.
17:20Like a, what you call it, a chaperone.
17:25I must be very careful, Senor.
17:28Does she speak Americano?
17:30No, no.
17:31That's good.
17:33Why don't you lose her?
17:35Perhaps, in a little while.
17:41Senor, you are the man who has the cochina doll?
17:45Yeah, I'm the fella.
17:47Well, it is silly, yes.
17:50But my people, they believe in it, Senor.
17:54I would like to get it back.
17:56I do not want unhappy people on my state, Senor.
17:59Well, you can have it, Doña Maria, for 1,000 pesos.
18:03We'll pay the ransom, Senor.
18:051,000 pesos.
18:07It is agreed?
18:08Agreed.
18:09And then maybe you can help me celebrate with the money.
18:12Senor, I must go. My dueña, she waits.
18:15Where's the money?
18:16I will bring it, Senor.
18:18I will meet you at Esperanza Rock in one hour.
18:21That's on the other side of the border. Nothing doing.
18:24Senor, this is the only way that we can be alone.
18:27I must escape from my dueña.
18:29And I can do it only by crossing the border.
18:32I will bring the money, and you will bring the cochina doll.
18:36Si?
18:37Doña Maria, if you try any funny business...
18:40Senor, I am Doña Maria Villanueva, and I do not lie.
18:52I heard some of that.
18:54Don't you be a fool. Don't go across that border.
18:58There's a woman with real class, Hurley.
19:00You don't have to worry about her.
19:02Well, I'm worrying. I think it's a trap.
19:04You worry too much.
19:06You're getting the money.
19:07Brother, I am.
19:08All you've contributed to the thing is a whole lot of whining.
19:10Sure I'm whining, because every time you see a woman, you go plum loco.
19:15I'll tell you one thing, Storch.
19:17I'm not crossing the border with you when you're not taking that doll.
19:20Look, Hurley, nobody tells me what I can or can't do.
19:23Now listen to reason.
19:25I'll go with you as far as the border, but I'll stay on the Mexican side.
19:29And if this Doña Maria is on the level, she shows up with the money, I'll be there to meet her with the doll.
19:33Does that sound right?
19:34Maybe.
19:35And if it is a double cross, I can give you some cover.
19:38All right, let's go.
19:40I don't want to keep that sweet little Doña Maria waiting.
20:05Oh, you frightened me.
20:32What did you say?
20:33Oh, it is you, senor.
20:35I say, did you watch for the alcalde?
20:39I thought you sounded American.
20:41No, senor.
20:43Don't worry about Juan.
20:44He's probably hiding in a hole somewhere.
20:47Maria, have you ever been to Arizona?
20:51Arizona, senor?
20:53Where is this place?
20:55Way out west.
20:56I think you'd like it.
20:58Got lots of space out there.
21:00We have that here, senor.
21:02The, uh, the cochina doll.
21:05You have brought it?
21:06Sure, it's in my saddlebag.
21:08You show me the color of your money, and I'll get the doll.
21:11Si, senor.
21:16You're no senorita.
21:18You're an American and a double-crosser.
21:19Oh, no, senor.
21:20I'm telling you, Maria, you're a-
21:22Cut the masquerade.
21:22Who are you?
21:28Put your hands up, short.
21:31Let go of me!
21:32Let go!
21:33Be careful.
21:33If one of us stops bled, it's going to be you.
21:36Where are you?
21:36Yes!
21:40Let go of me!
21:42Take it easy!
21:44No!
21:52Hold it, short!
21:54Don't shoot, judge.
21:57I don't shoot quick curves.
22:00Where's that cochina doll, short?
22:02There's the doll, judge.
22:04It's still on this side of the border, safe and sound.
22:07Now, it'll cost 5,000 pesos to get it back.
22:11You thought you could fool both of us, didn't you, judge?
22:14Well, you never fooled me, not for one minute.
22:17Well, looks like we botched it.
22:19All right, get going down that trailer.
22:27You can't do this!
22:28This ain't legal!
22:30You've already done it.
22:32Let's go!
22:34You can't arrest me on this side of the border!
22:36I'm a Mexican, short!
22:37Not for long.
22:39Let's go!
22:41You're the American side of the law now, Hurley.
22:43Get to your feet.
22:50All right, get going, you two.
22:52Looks to me as though you two are
22:54guilty of everything in the book, short of murder.
22:57Your trial will come up in three days.
22:59I'm holding you without bail.
23:01Lock him up, kid.
23:09Your Honor, we of Havanache wish to extend our thanks
23:18to all you have done, verdad, muchachos?
23:21They are of the corazón, from my heart.
23:25Oh, now, Juan, you don't need to carry on like that.
23:29I'm an old friend of yours.
23:31But such a friend, verdad, muchachos?
23:35The courage of the eagle, the strength of el toro,
23:38the intriguity of...
23:40No, no, no.
23:42Juan.
23:45You're going to make it impossible
23:46for me to live with myself.
23:49All right, Your Honor.
23:50I will say no more.
23:51But before we go, you must accept
23:53this token of our friendship.
23:55Verdad, muchachos?
24:01I want to thank you, Juan, and all the rest of you
24:05good people of Aguinoche.
24:07Muchas gracias.
24:09Open it, Uncle Ron.
24:10Let's see what it is.
24:13Isn't that lovely?
24:14It's another cachina doll.
24:17And it will bring you good luck
24:19to you and your people for a hundred years.
24:22Verdad, muchachos?
24:23Muchas gracias.
24:43I can hear every steer
24:47The sound of the thundering herd
24:50It's so real I can feel
24:54The warmth of a friendly word
24:58So I know I must go
25:01To the land of the fake oaks
25:05There to stay, there to stay
25:09There to stay till I die