Dry Rot (1956)
1h 27min | Comedy, Crime | 31 October 1956 (UK)
In this comedy, three bookies attempt to win back their recent losses by kidnapping the favored horse and substituting it with a heavily drugged nag.
Director: Maurice Elvey
Writers: John T. Chapman (play) (as John Roy Chapman), John T. Chapman (screenplay) (as John Roy Chapman)
Stars: Ronald Shiner, Brian Rix, Sidney James
1h 27min | Comedy, Crime | 31 October 1956 (UK)
In this comedy, three bookies attempt to win back their recent losses by kidnapping the favored horse and substituting it with a heavily drugged nag.
Director: Maurice Elvey
Writers: John T. Chapman (play) (as John Roy Chapman), John T. Chapman (screenplay) (as John Roy Chapman)
Stars: Ronald Shiner, Brian Rix, Sidney James
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
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00:27:49Holy smoke! Do you think somebody's died?
00:27:51I don't know, but we'll soon find out.
00:28:01Ah, there you are, Mr. Danby.
00:28:03Mr. Tubbs, your secretary's back.
00:28:06Tom Poe! Welcome to my staff.
00:28:09Thank you, sir.
00:28:12I didn't know you were married.
00:28:14Married?
00:28:16Oh, I'm not his wife.
00:28:18Oh, you deviled Jew!
00:28:20This is my home. I live here.
00:28:23That, sir, is my daughter.
00:28:25Pardon my clangor.
00:28:28How do you do?
00:28:30This is my valet, Mr. Frederick Phipps.
00:28:31I'm very pleased to meet you.
00:28:33Come along, Mr. Danby, and I'll show you to your room.
00:28:36Right. I'll see you later.
00:28:38Here, take that, and don't drop it now. It's heavy.
00:28:41Excuse me, Mr. Tubbs.
00:28:43Certainly, Mr. Danby.
00:28:45Better keep to the centre. There's some dry rot there.
00:28:49Right.
00:28:51Put the wood in the owl.
00:28:54Oh, by the way, Mr. Tubbs, if you want anything, just ring the bell.
00:28:57Doesn't work.
00:28:58Give it a kick, then.
00:28:59We did.
00:29:00I mean, what would happen if we did?
00:29:02Nothing very much, I imagine, except perhaps you might make a hole in the wall.
00:29:08What are you laughing at?
00:29:12Go on, give it a kick.
00:29:17Alf!
00:29:19Alf, have you got a torch?
00:29:20Torch? What for?
00:29:21I've lost Sweet Lavender.
00:29:22You've lost him?
00:29:23Yes.
00:29:24But you can't lose a horse.
00:29:25Well, it's so dark, I can't find him.
00:29:26Well, never mind. He can't get out.
00:29:27He can't get out?
00:29:29What the...
00:29:31Come on, get out of here.
00:29:33Come on, old girl.
00:29:34What do you mean, old girl? It's an old boy.
00:29:36What's the matter with you?
00:29:38Hey, look! A mouse!
00:29:50Yes.
00:29:52That's it. There we are.
00:29:54Steady, steady.
00:29:55Now, look.
00:29:56We've got to make certain that this horse can't possibly win.
00:29:59You give him one of these pills.
00:30:00Look.
00:30:01Twice a day.
00:30:02What for?
00:30:03Keep him dopey.
00:30:04And what about me?
00:30:05You're dopey enough as it is.
00:30:06Blimey, I've got to have some grub.
00:30:07Well, we can feed you through the panel.
00:30:08I don't want you to have any bother.
00:30:09I'll nip out the other end through the ruin.
00:30:10Don't you dare.
00:30:12You've got to stay here with Sweet Lavender day and night.
00:30:15Me sleep with a horse?
00:30:16Yes.
00:30:17Blimey, I'll have nightmares.
00:30:19Never mind about your nightmares.
00:30:20And for goodness sake, keep him quiet.
00:30:23Hold on.
00:30:25Me, keep him with a Gigi.
00:30:38Poor old Flash, he must be starving down there with that horse.
00:30:41Well, I'm fed up with you taking all my grub to feed him.
00:30:44Since last Tuesday, I've had enough of tapioca pudding and stewed prunes.
00:30:47Do you good.
00:30:48I only had that because you can't stuff it in your pocket.
00:30:50Will you stop grumbling?
00:30:51How do you expect to get £10,000 without a bit of hardship?
00:30:54You want jam on it?
00:30:55Aye, it might give it a bit of a taste.
00:30:57You drunk all this?
00:30:59Go and open the panel, will you, while I get Flash some more coffee.
00:31:01All right.
00:31:05One, two, three. One, two, three. One, two, three.
00:31:08You'll be able to go to the ball after all, Fred.
00:31:11Are you going to a ball, Fred?
00:31:13Oh, aye.
00:31:14Oh, I can dance too, Fred.
00:31:16Can you?
00:31:17Aye.
00:31:19Aye.
00:31:22Oh, I do like you, Fred.
00:31:24Do you?
00:31:25Aye.
00:31:26I like you and all.
00:31:27Do you, my dear?
00:31:28Aye.
00:31:29Are you walking out with anyone?
00:31:30No, I've been't.
00:31:31Well, could I take you out, like?
00:31:33Aye.
00:31:34When?
00:31:35Oh, tonight.
00:31:36Will you?
00:31:37Pictures.
00:31:38What's on?
00:31:39It came from outer space.
00:31:40Did it? I mean, is it?
00:31:41Proper made my heart flutter.
00:31:42Oh, have you seen it?
00:31:43Aye.
00:31:44Who's in it?
00:31:45Oh, I can't remember.
00:31:46What's it about?
00:31:47I can't remember.
00:31:48Well, what has it made your heart flutter?
00:31:50The man sitting beside me.
00:31:52Yeah, I thought I said there wasn't walking out.
00:31:54Oh, it's all right, Fred.
00:31:55I don't know who he was.
00:31:56Oh.
00:31:59Eh?
00:32:00Frederick.
00:32:02Oh, hey, up, hey, up.
00:32:04Don't forget tonight, will you?
00:32:08No, I won't.
00:32:09Oh, us'll have some rare fun.
00:32:12Pictures.
00:32:13Ah, well.
00:32:14Bye for now.
00:32:15Bye.
00:32:18Oh.
00:32:23Why don't you shave in the morning, Casanova?
00:32:26Eh?
00:32:28There's no doubt about it, Beth.
00:32:30You're fatal to men.
00:32:31Fatal.
00:32:32What's that?
00:32:33Oh, good morning, Mr. Danby.
00:32:35Good morning, Beth.
00:32:36Shall I tell you something?
00:32:37Yes, if you like.
00:32:38I found a man.
00:32:39Where?
00:32:40Here.
00:32:41Here.
00:32:42Ah.
00:32:43What have you done with him?
00:32:44Oh, nothing yet.
00:32:45I'm waiting till tonight.
00:32:46Good morning.
00:32:47Morning, Miss Wagstaff.
00:32:48How are you liking your new job?
00:32:49Well, it might help a little if I knew something about bookmaking.
00:32:52Don't you?
00:32:53Not a thing.
00:32:54May I?
00:32:55Oh, please.
00:32:56Blimey, there's Tilly here.
00:32:57I've been here for three days now.
00:32:58Mr. Tubbs still hasn't fired me.
00:32:59It's amazing.
00:33:00Danby.
00:33:01Morning, Mr. Tubbs.
00:33:02Good morning.
00:33:03I've got a couple of letters for you to post.
00:33:04Miss Wagstaff.
00:33:05They're urgent.
00:33:06Would you like a stroll?
00:33:07No, thanks.
00:33:08I've plenty to do here.
00:33:09But a walk down a leafy lane on a lovely morning like this is a real tonic.
00:33:12With you?
00:33:13With me and the birds and the bees.
00:33:15Aye, aye.
00:33:16Aye.
00:33:17No, another time, perhaps.
00:33:25Danby.
00:33:28Are you still here?
00:33:30Yeah.
00:33:31Well, you didn't ought to be.
00:33:35Put the stamps on this dime.
00:33:39Operation panel.
00:33:42Where's me grub?
00:33:43I'm starving.
00:33:44Here it is.
00:33:45Hurry up.
00:33:46How's sweet lavender?
00:33:47Oh, fine.
00:33:48Good.
00:33:49Still stand up?
00:33:50Yes.
00:33:51Good.
00:33:52If he leans on something.
00:33:53Aye?
00:33:54No, he's all right.
00:33:55Oh, lovely.
00:33:56Bang it.
00:33:57Well, where's the cosmetics?
00:33:58Cosmetics?
00:33:59Bang it in, will you?
00:34:00What?
00:34:01Take it easy.
00:34:02I'll bang me head on the lever in there.
00:34:03Oh, perhaps it works the door from the inside.
00:34:05Let's have a look.
00:34:10Oh, this part...
00:34:12There it is.
00:34:13Pull it.
00:34:14I am pulling it.
00:34:15It won't budge.
00:34:16Well, push it.
00:34:17Aye.
00:34:22Well, really.
00:34:24Beth.
00:34:25Beth.
00:34:26Yes, my dear?
00:34:27What's all this food for?
00:34:28Oh, that'll be for Mr. Toby.
00:34:30Says he feeds the birds.
00:34:32Well, take it away.
00:34:33I've got quite enough trouble catering for everyone
00:34:35without bothering about our dumb friends in the garden.
00:34:37Where's the Colonel?
00:34:38In the garden.
00:34:44Where's me breakfast?
00:34:45Oh, you've had it. It's gone.
00:34:46Oh, blimey. I'll catch my own attrition.
00:34:48Too bad.
00:34:49Get back in there before someone comes.
00:34:51Use the lever to open the door.
00:34:53Well, how will I know if it's safe?
00:34:54If it's safe, we'll give you three knocks.
00:34:56And what if it ain't safe?
00:34:57We'll give you one big knock.
00:34:58Let's try it and see if he can hear us.
00:35:00OK.
00:35:10Hello, hello.
00:35:11What in the name of fun is going on here?
00:35:14Oh, um, just testing for dry rot.
00:35:17I beg your pardon?
00:35:19Mr. Phipps is an expert on rot.
00:35:22Oh, yes, that is right.
00:35:24And knowing about your spot and stairs,
00:35:26I was wondering if you had any more like.
00:35:28How can you tell?
00:35:29Oh, um, just by tapping, see?
00:35:33Just by tapping, see?
00:35:35And then if you get a sort of ollow sound,
00:35:37you know what you've got.
00:35:38What?
00:35:39Rot.
00:35:40Do let's see, Henry.
00:35:42Oh, very well, my dear.
00:36:03Oh, I mailed those letters, Mr. Tubb.
00:36:06Oh, I'm sorry, Colonel.
00:36:07Henry, are you all right?
00:36:09I've never felt better.
00:36:10Oh, good, dear.
00:36:11Henry, what day is it today?
00:36:13Friday, dear.
00:36:14Friday?
00:36:15I seem to associate something with Friday.
00:36:18I can't think of what it is.
00:36:19Oh, well, I'll take out the vegetables.
00:36:23Why don't you get in there?
00:36:28Merci, mon brave.
00:36:29Merci, mon brave.
00:36:30Coucou, me voilà !
00:36:32Bonjour, je suis bien content d'être arrivé.
00:36:34C'est charmant ici, votre auberge.
00:36:36Bien, j'adore la campagne anglaise.
00:36:37Polignac.
00:36:39Albert Polignac.
00:36:40Vous me connaissez déjà , n'est-ce pas?
00:36:42Look here.
00:36:43Je voudrais voir le patron.
00:36:45Ah, bonjour, monsieur.
00:36:47Je suis heureux de faire votre connaissance.
00:36:50Is he a pal of yours?
00:36:52I've never seen that geyser.
00:36:53He seems to like you.
00:36:54Voilà , je dois vous dire quelque chose.
00:36:55Je ne peux rester ici que pour la nuit.
00:36:57Mais croyez que je le regrette beaucoup.
00:36:59Beaucoup.
00:37:00Voilà , that's right.
00:37:01Who the devil is he?
00:37:03He's French.
00:37:04Tell him this is an hotel.
00:37:05I'll try.
00:37:06Monsieur.
00:37:07Oui?
00:37:08C'est un hôtel.
00:37:09Ici, un hôtel.
00:37:11Je sais bien que c'est un hôtel.
00:37:12Bien sûr que c'est un hôtel.
00:37:13Je ne serais pas venu ici sans savoir que c'est un hôtel.
00:37:16Well, I guess we all agree on that point.
00:37:18For the last time, will somebody tell me who he is?
00:37:21Who are you?
00:37:23Pardon?
00:37:24Granted.
00:37:25Your name?
00:37:27Et c'est à moi que vous demandez ça?
00:37:28À moi, le plus grand jockey de France?
00:37:30Well, we'll just call you Short House.
00:37:33Once and for all, who the devil are you?
00:37:36Henry, what is going on?
00:37:40Madame.
00:37:42Oh, madame.
00:37:43Madame, fuyez, fuyez.
00:37:44Ici, vous n'aurez que des ennuis.
00:37:46This is the wife of the manager.
00:37:47Pardon?
00:37:48Femme du manager.
00:37:50Femme du manager?
00:37:51Oui.
00:37:52Oh, madame.
00:37:53Je suis tellement heureux de rencontrer une personne aussi ravissante que vous.
00:37:59Here, come away from my wife.
00:38:02Be patient, Henry.
00:38:03I'm sure he's nearly finished.
00:38:05Madame, vous êtes belle et capricieuse comme une matinée d'automne.
00:38:10Would you like a salt and vinegar?
00:38:13If somebody doesn't tell me who he is, I shall go stark staring mad.
00:38:17Pardon, monsieur.
00:38:18Thought to renown?
00:38:20Your moniker?
00:38:21Name?
00:38:22Saffy.
00:38:23Oh, mon dieu.
00:38:25You'd have saved a lot of time if you'd have said that before, Mr. Mongier.
00:38:28Oh, no, I don't think that's right, Mr. Tubb.
00:38:30Now?
00:38:31Oh.
00:38:32Pardon, monsieur.
00:38:33Thought to renown?
00:38:34Mais, Polignac, Albert Polignac.
00:38:37Henry.
00:38:38It's that man, Friday.
00:38:40Man Friday?
00:38:41No, no, dear.
00:38:42The man who was coming here on Friday.
00:38:44That was a jockey.
00:38:46Oui, oui, jockey.
00:38:48Jockey?
00:38:49Oh, he's smiling.
00:38:50You ought to see it now.
00:38:51I'm very pleased to meet you.
00:38:54Hey, wait a minute.
00:38:55Maybe he's riding the favorite tomorrow.
00:38:56He's a French horse.
00:38:59You're not riding Cardinal?
00:39:01Cardinal.
00:39:02Voilà , Cardinal.
00:39:03C'est ça, Cardinal.
00:39:05C'est ça, Cardinal.
00:39:06C'est mon cheval.
00:39:07Et demain, Cardinal, il ira comme un flèche de repousse.
00:39:10He's passed the post.
00:39:11Oh, no, he hasn't, because we're going to switch the...
00:39:14Switch the cardam!
00:39:17Beth.
00:39:18Yes, mon dieu.
00:39:19This gentleman's case is up to room number five.
00:39:22This way.
00:39:23Merci, mademoiselle.
00:39:24He's French.
00:39:25Oh, this way, Mr. French.
00:39:27Mr. Danby, would you warn him about the dry rot?
00:39:30Oh, yes.
00:39:31Wait.
00:39:32Just a minute.
00:39:33Look out.
00:39:34Monsieur.
00:39:35Prenez garde.
00:39:37Pardon?
00:39:38Don't rush me.
00:39:40Dry rot.
00:39:41Dry.
00:39:42Sac?
00:39:43Sac?
00:39:45I'm not finished.
00:39:46Anyone know French for rot?
00:39:52Compost?
00:39:54Monsieur.
00:39:55Prenez garde.
00:39:56Sac?
00:39:57Compost.
00:39:58Sac?
00:39:59Compost.
00:40:00Sac?
00:40:01Sac?
00:40:02Compost?
00:40:03No, no, no.
00:40:04He's French.
00:40:05Oh, c'est anglais.
00:40:06I knew it.
00:40:08Do something.
00:40:09You just stand there.
00:40:10We're not French.
00:40:11Ah!
00:40:25Is he asleep?
00:40:42Oh!
00:40:56Am I the dry rot?
00:40:57Ah, yes, yes.
00:40:58Poor old Flash must be starving.
00:40:59He's only had one sausage, and that was 14 hours ago.
00:41:02Go on, open the pad.
00:41:03Here I am.
00:41:04Steady.
00:41:05Quiet!
00:41:12He's never there when you want him.
00:41:20This morning he was popping in and out like a piston.
00:41:36Hey, here's your grub.
00:41:37It's about time.
00:41:38What have you been doing with it?
00:41:39Growing it?
00:41:41Don't move or I'll shoot.
00:41:48I can hear you.
00:41:51No!
00:41:54Henry, what ever's happened?
00:41:56Daddy, are you all right?
00:41:58How can I possibly catch them if you keep on shouting?
00:42:01Catch who?
00:42:02Burglars.
00:42:03What burglars?
00:42:04There isn't a sign of one.
00:42:06You must have dreamt it all.
00:42:07No, I did not.
00:42:08Well, now we're up, I'll put the kettle on, shall I?
00:42:10Yes, dear.
00:42:11You'd better get the cards out as well.
00:42:14What's up?
00:42:15Burglars.
00:42:16Anything missing?
00:42:17My husband's pot.
00:42:19Oh, it's muddy.
00:42:20Stuck?
00:42:21Oh, no, dear boy.
00:42:22I always sleep in this position.
00:42:24Well, don't just stand there.
00:42:25Do something.
00:42:29Stop munching, Ely, are you?
00:42:33My best boy.
00:42:34Look, Colonel, when I say you pull, all right?
00:42:36Yeah.
00:42:37Right.
00:42:41Thank you, dear boy.
00:42:42Come along, Henry.
00:42:43Yes.
00:42:44We'd better phone the police.
00:42:46In the morning, darling.
00:42:47Don't disturb them now.
00:42:49Good night, Mr. Danby.
00:42:51Good night, Colonel.
00:42:56Well, the panic's over.
00:42:58Oh, you're frightening me.
00:42:59I'm sorry.
00:43:00Can I help?
00:43:01No, thanks, I can manage.
00:43:02The kettle won't be long.
00:43:08Sure I can help?
00:43:10Quite sure, thank you.
00:43:11I'm worried about Sweet Lavender.
00:43:13He's still breathing, isn't he?
00:43:14Well.
00:43:15What do you mean, well?
00:43:16Anyway, we can give him something to pep him up.
00:43:18Look, this French horse, Cardinal, arrives tomorrow,
00:43:20and he's got to look fit enough to switch.
00:43:22Well, he don't look like a wonder horse to me.
00:43:23Well, don't be silly.
00:43:24He's got to.
00:43:25Otherwise, the jockey's going to be suspicious.
00:43:27Jockey?
00:43:28I've forgotten about his jockey.
00:43:29I don't think he can carry one of them.
00:43:31Will you stop aggravating me?
00:43:33Well, I'm still hungry.
00:43:34I could eat a horse.
00:43:35Eh?
00:43:36Ah, shut up, will you?
00:43:38Now, look, Fred, you look after the horse.
00:43:40I'll take you upstairs, find you some grub.
00:43:42It's all right.
00:43:43He don't kick.
00:43:44He just bites.
00:43:45There you are, son.
00:43:46Get your hold.
00:43:49Milk first.
00:43:50What's the difference?
00:43:52I don't know.
00:43:53It's always milk first.
00:43:54Well, that's about as clear to me as cricket.
00:44:02Hey.
00:44:03Sonny's put the lights on.
00:44:05The lights, I'm hungry.
00:44:06I'm glad your father heard a burglar.
00:44:07Why?
00:44:08Well, if he hadn't, we wouldn't be down here together now.
00:44:10Well, I'm not sure.
00:44:11We ought to be.
00:44:12Can I carry that upstairs for you?
00:44:14Oh, no, it's all right.
00:44:16What time's breakfast?
00:44:17Oh, about nine.
00:44:18Why?
00:44:19Well, that gives us six and a half hours to say good night.
00:44:24Good night, Mr. Danby.
00:44:25Good night, Miss Swagstaff.
00:44:27Oh, Mr. Tubbs left his hat down here.
00:44:36Oh, Miss Swagstaff.
00:44:37Yes, Mr. Danby?
00:44:39May I call you Susan?
00:44:41All right, John.
00:44:43Good night, Susan.
00:44:44Good night, John.
00:44:45Alfred.
00:44:49What is it?
00:44:50Can I call you Alfred?
00:44:53Here, goof, goof!
00:44:54Flash, Flash, where are you?
00:44:55Shut up!
00:44:57What is it?
00:44:58It's Sweet Lavender.
00:44:59He's unconscious.
00:45:01Unconscious?
00:45:02You blithering idiot.
00:45:04That's 10,000 pounds you cost me.
00:45:05Now, look.
00:45:06Cardinal can win the race now.
00:45:08We've got nothing to switch it with.
00:45:10I'll tell you what.
00:45:11What?
00:45:12We can nobble it.
00:45:13But that's illegal.
00:45:14How?
00:45:15I can't think without me hat on.
00:45:22Monsieur, où?
00:45:29Merci.
00:45:31Oui, oui.
00:45:34Take a seat here.
00:45:35Now, listen.
00:45:36We haven't got to worry about Cardinal anymore.
00:45:38He's got his jockey here.
00:45:40How do you mean?
00:45:41Keep Pollinack here until after the race and put another jockey on.
00:45:43Ah, but où?
00:45:44Doesn't matter où.
00:45:45As long as he's not known on the course and can't ride well enough to win.
00:45:48Well, that lets me out.
00:45:49Yeah, I'm too heavy.
00:45:50Now, who do we know that's not known, not too heavy and can't ride?
00:45:55Not too heavy.
00:45:57Can't ride well.
00:45:59Hey, don't look at me.
00:46:00I'm not going on any horse for nobody.
00:46:02I tell you, I do a lot of horse for nobody.
00:46:04There he is.
00:46:05They're back.
00:46:07Hey, wait for me.
00:46:08Here, watch this.
00:46:09Watch this.
00:46:14Here you go.
00:46:15Merci.
00:46:24I can't believe it.
00:46:27I can't sleep.
00:46:29What's going on?
00:46:30Magnus, a whole gang of them.
00:46:32I'm going to phone the police.
00:46:34Here, here, take my gun and cover all the doors with it.
00:46:37Hello, hello, hello, hello.
00:46:39Come at once, the Bull and Cow.
00:46:41We're being attacked at all points.
00:46:43Flash, Flash, where are you?
00:46:46Flash!
00:46:47No!
00:46:50Stop!
00:46:52Give me that.
00:46:53Go and get a broom or a poker or something.
00:46:55Where have they gone, Colonel?
00:46:57How should I know?
00:46:58Have you got anything, Doddys?
00:47:00No, dear.
00:47:01Go and get yourself something.
00:47:02I'll get some more tea, shall I?
00:47:04Tea?
00:47:05Your lives are in danger and you talk about tea?
00:47:08Then how about a whiskey?
00:47:09Good idea.
00:47:11Barricade the door.
00:47:15Take cover!
00:47:21Oh, I've been through such agony in all my life.
00:47:25Get down, boys!
00:47:33Look, why don't you answer the door?
00:47:34Maybe it's the police.
00:47:35Will you get down, boy?
00:47:37Yes.
00:47:38Take this gun, adopt a prone position and keep me covered.
00:47:42Come on, Doddy.
00:47:43Lie on your stomach, girl.
00:47:47And about time, too.
00:47:49What's the matter with all these people?
00:47:50Are they dead?
00:47:51Certainly not.
00:47:53I phoned for the police.
00:47:54I am the police.
00:47:55Sergeant Fire reporting.
00:47:57Don't be absurd.
00:47:58Be quiet.
00:47:59I will not be quiet.
00:48:00I was a colonel in the army.
00:48:01And I was a brigadier in the ATS.
00:48:02Sit down.
00:48:03I will not sit down.
00:48:04Now, look here, Miss...
00:48:05Fire!
00:48:06Fire!
00:48:10Give me that gun.
00:48:11I give up.
00:48:12I give up.
00:48:13I've had enough.
00:48:14Right through my hat, that went, sir.
00:48:16It nearly blew me brains out.
00:48:18I'll sue you.
00:48:19Look at me hat.
00:48:20You're under arrest.
00:48:21What for?
00:48:22Where's the rest of your gang?
00:48:23Gang?
00:48:24Fred!
00:48:25Hello!
00:48:26Come out of there before she shoots your block off.
00:48:28Oh!
00:48:29Get to bed, the rest of you.
00:48:31Glad to.
00:48:32What's going on?
00:48:33Good night, sir.
00:48:34Good night.
00:48:35Get to bed!
00:48:37Bang it off.
00:48:38Bang it up!
00:48:40What are you doing?
00:48:43What are you doing?
00:48:44Bang it up!
00:48:46What are you doing?
00:48:48Getting ready to go to bed.
00:48:51And you?
00:48:52Oh, I'm a sister to him.
00:48:53I'm his Welsh dresser.
00:48:55You see...
00:48:56Be quiet!
00:48:57What were you doing in the garden?
00:48:58I?
00:48:59Oh, uh, sowing.
00:49:00At three o'clock in the morning?
00:49:02Early seeds.
00:49:04Be quiet!
00:49:06What were you doing?
00:49:07Weeding.
00:49:08Why weren't you in bed?
00:49:09Well, I don't weed in bed.
00:49:11Be quiet!
00:49:12I?
00:49:13Look, cannot be excused.
00:49:14Why?
00:49:15Look, I'm soaking wet.
00:49:24This is my house.
00:49:25Will you kindly get out?
00:49:26You're interfering with the law.
00:49:28I shall arrest you.
00:49:29This is an outrage.
00:49:30I shall report you.
00:49:31Don't you wag your finger at me.
00:49:33I've got a gun, remember?
00:49:34I don't care.
00:49:35You've got an arsenal.
00:49:36It's my gun.
00:49:37Give it me back.
00:49:38Women aren't safe with lunatics like you around.
00:49:40Lunatics?
00:49:41You're a lunatic.
00:49:42A maniac.
00:49:43What?
00:49:44Probably a sex maniac.
00:49:45Oh, oh, oh.
00:49:46How dare you?
00:49:47Keep back or I'll shoot.
00:49:48Give me that gun.
00:49:49Keep back.
00:49:50Give it.
00:49:51Keep back.
00:49:52Keep away, you dirty old man.
00:49:55Henry, what are you doing now?
00:49:57Doing?
00:49:59I'm not doing anything.
00:50:00It's what this woman's been doing.
00:50:01Police!
00:50:02We're trying to get a gun from her.
00:50:03Police!
00:50:07Susan.
00:50:08Hello.
00:50:09How are you?
00:50:10I didn't sleep very well.
00:50:11You look wonderful.
00:50:12Let's take Daddy's chair.
00:50:13Here, I'll take it.
00:50:14No, it's all right.
00:50:15Susan.
00:50:16Yes, John?
00:50:17I dreamt about you last night.
00:50:18Did you?
00:50:19Uh-huh.
00:50:20I asked you a question and before you had a chance to answer it, I woke up.
00:50:23Now, wasn't that stupid?
00:50:24It depends.
00:50:25You might have got the wrong answer.
00:50:29Well, I think I'll find out now.
00:50:30Are you listening?
00:50:31Yes, John.
00:50:33Well, we're back in my dream.
00:50:34And I say to you, Susan.
00:50:36And you say to me.
00:50:37Yes, John.
00:50:38That's right.
00:50:39And I say, Susan, can I kiss you?
00:50:42And you say.
00:50:44Well.
00:50:51Yes, John.
00:50:55When you've quite finished scrambling my eggs, I should like my breakfast.
00:51:02Any letters for me?
00:51:03Yes.
00:51:04They're all for you.
00:51:06They're on the tray.
00:51:29You haven't half landed me in a mess.
00:51:31Come on, come on.
00:51:32Get this down.
00:51:33You'll feel a lot better.
00:51:35Go on.
00:51:37Go on, force yourself.
00:51:39Come on.
00:51:40Come on.
00:51:41Oh, that's better.
00:51:42You'll be up and about in no time.
00:52:02Careful, careful.
00:52:03That's the cardinal.
00:52:04That's the cardinal.
00:52:06Oh, he looks a winner, all right.
00:52:18I've got to pull in that snick-snack's hair.
00:52:20Well, bring him down.
00:52:23Colt.
00:52:24Colt.
00:52:25What's up?
00:52:26Sweet Lavender, he's on his feet again.
00:52:27Oh, well, I'm delighted to hear it, but he's just too late.
00:52:29But you're dead on time.
00:52:31We've got your racing class.
00:52:33Oh, no, no, no.
00:52:34No, but yes, yes, yes.
00:52:36Now, try your party clothes on.
00:52:39But I'm not wearing those.
00:52:40Oh, yes, you are.
00:52:41They're your racing colours.
00:52:43But I'm not going in any race.
00:52:45You'll do as you're told.
00:52:46Well, I won't.
00:52:47Yes, you will.
00:52:48You're in this up to your neck, so shut up.
00:52:51Well, I'll go to police.
00:52:52Oh, you distraught.
00:52:55He's tickling me.
00:52:56Never mind about tickling your flesh.
00:52:58Get him over there.
00:52:59Go on.
00:53:04Oh.
00:53:07Mr Tubb.
00:53:10Who is that?
00:53:11Oh, the piano tuner.
00:53:13The piano tuner?
00:53:14Yes.
00:53:15You are the piano tuner, aren't you?
00:53:16No.
00:53:17Yes.
00:53:18Yes.
00:53:19But what's he doing here?
00:53:20He was sent for.
00:53:21Sent for?
00:53:22Sent for.
00:53:23Sent for.
00:53:24But who by?
00:53:25Er, who was you sent from here for to buy?
00:53:28Eh?
00:53:29I'm not saying that again.
00:53:30There I have it.
00:53:31Colonel Wagstaff sent for him.
00:53:33Colonel Wagstaff?
00:53:34Yeah.
00:53:35Well, I'm afraid the strain has been too much for the Colonel.
00:53:39You see, we have no piano.
00:53:43Oh, that's a better look.
00:53:44What?
00:53:45He said that's rotten luck.
00:53:47Well, I'm sorry, but he must go back.
00:53:50Yeah, he must.
00:53:51We'll put him on a bus.
00:53:52There aren't any buses.
00:53:54That's quite all right.
00:53:55He came by tricycle.
00:53:56Beep, beep, beep.
00:53:57Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
00:53:59Oops, I've got a puncture.
00:54:07Good morning, Henry.
00:54:08Good morning, my dear.
00:54:09Henry, we've been here for six weeks, haven't we?
00:54:12Yes.
00:54:13Do you ever remember seeing a piano?
00:54:16Piano?
00:54:17Because if you have, I wish you'd show me where it is.
00:54:21Do you feel all right?
00:54:22Yes, perfectly.
00:54:24Oh.
00:54:25Now, about this piano.
00:54:27Yes, my dear?
00:54:28Where is it?
00:54:30Where is it?
00:54:31Have you seen it?
00:54:33No.
00:54:34Well, exactly.
00:54:36Perhaps it's in the saloon bar.
00:54:38Well, there wouldn't be room for it there.
00:54:41Well, we could shift the furniture around a bit.
00:54:44No, the point I'm trying to make is that we have no piano.
00:54:49Do you want one?
00:54:50No, thank you.
00:54:52Oh.
00:54:53So, how can we have it tuned?
00:54:55You see, it is rather a problem.
00:54:57Well, it would be for a piano tuner.
00:55:00Quite.
00:55:01So, there's not much point in its coming here, is there?
00:55:04No, not really.
00:55:07Well, that's a relief.
00:55:08Now, Doris, why don't you go and lie down and stop worrying?
00:55:11No, no, dear, it's all over now.
00:55:13I'm very glad to hear it.
00:55:14But, Henry.
00:55:15Yes, dear?
00:55:16It's a long way to come for nothing on a tricycle.
00:55:20It's a long way to come for nothing on a tricycle.
00:55:36Oh, we've ain't open yet, my dear.
00:55:41What, my dear?
00:55:46What is it, my dear?
00:55:50My dear, I would like something to drink.
00:55:57Go on with it. Let's hear some more.
00:55:59That's it. So, go and get me something to drink.
00:56:01I can hear you don't come from these parts.
00:56:04I would like to drink, drink something.
00:56:12Don't stop.
00:56:14What's the matter? Have I said something?
00:56:16My dear.
00:56:17That's better.
00:56:18Go on.
00:56:19No, no, no, simmer down.
00:56:20You're much too excitable.
00:56:22Here, have a drink and calm down.
00:56:30If you wanted it as bad as that, why didn't you ask?
00:56:34Well, you might have said thank you.
00:56:37What?
00:56:46Oh, well, just a sip.
00:56:50Here you are.
00:56:51Merci, mademoiselle.
00:56:59Encore?
00:57:17Which way did he go?
00:57:18Keep up.
00:57:29We're sick of death chasing you all around the garden.
00:57:31Get your racing colours on.
00:57:32But he'll see me.
00:57:33No, he won't.
00:57:35Get behind the screen and nobody will see you.
00:57:37All right, all right.
00:57:38And hurry up.
00:57:39All right.
00:57:40We'll keep him talking.
00:57:41Coucou.
00:57:42Hi.
00:57:43Bonjour, messieurs.
00:57:44Savez-vous que ces arêtes sont de même incroyables.
00:57:46Écoutez, elle m'a fait des avances d'abord et puis alors après elle m'envoie sur les rouges.
00:57:49C'est inimaginable.
00:57:50Non?
00:57:52Keep him talking.
00:57:54Hello.
00:57:55Hello.
00:57:57Hello.
00:57:58Hello.
00:57:59Hello.
00:58:00Comment ça va?
00:58:01Don't change the subject.
00:58:03Hello.
00:58:04Hello.
00:58:05Ah, shut up.
00:58:06We've had all that out.
00:58:07Here's your French phrase book.
00:58:08Can I help you?
00:58:09No, no, no, no, no.
00:58:10You take the day off.
00:58:11Yeah?
00:58:13Belle journée pour les courses aujourd'hui.
00:58:16I'm going to be very busy down here with him.
00:58:22You go upstairs and see nobody comes down, huh?
00:58:26What about him?
00:58:27He's going to have a little sleep, ain't you?
00:58:30Oui, oui, oui.
00:58:33A bit risky, isn't it?
00:58:34I know.
00:58:35We're not taking any risks, are we?
00:58:37No.
00:58:38No, no.
00:58:39Fred's going to do it.
00:58:41You're a mastermind, Gal.
00:58:43The real Genesis.
00:58:45Good luck.
00:58:47Here I am.
00:58:48Ah, good.
00:58:49Here you can't ride a horse like that.
00:58:51I'm not going to no horse.
00:58:52No, we'll see to that later.
00:58:54Oh, monsieur.
00:58:55Monsieur.
00:58:56This gentleman is going to knock your charming block off, aren't you?
00:59:00Hello.
00:59:01Hello.
00:59:02Oh, not that again.
00:59:03Hey, hey, hey.
00:59:04We've got to get rid of him.
00:59:05Ah, but how?
00:59:06Clock him one.
00:59:07What with?
00:59:08A rabbit pack.
00:59:09What's that?
00:59:10Oh, God.
00:59:12Fred, Fred, Fred, Fred.
00:59:13Wake up.
00:59:14What's the matter with you?
00:59:15Oh, what it me?
00:59:16It's me, Alfie.
00:59:18What the hell are you laughing at?
00:59:19There'll be much laugh with your laugh.
00:59:24Oh, I don't know what I'm laughing for.
00:59:26Here, you knock him out.
00:59:28You're very good at it.
00:59:29All right.
00:59:30You keep him talking while I nip round the back.
00:59:32What shall I say?
00:59:33Hello seems to please him as much as anything.
00:59:35Hello.
00:59:36Hello.
00:59:37Oh, it works.
00:59:38I speak French.
00:59:39Hello.
00:59:40Hello.
00:59:41Goodbye.
00:59:42Hey, quick.
00:59:43They're coming downstairs.
00:59:44Good morning.
00:59:45I hope you bagged the winner today.
00:59:47Thank you, Mr. Tubb.
00:59:48Oh, how's Mr. Polignac today?
00:59:50Oh, he's fine.
00:59:51Fine.
00:59:52Aren't you?
00:59:54See you later, huh?
00:59:55Au revoir, Mr. Polignac.
00:59:56Hi.
00:59:57Oh.
00:59:58Au revoir.
01:00:04Hey, come on.
01:00:05Get him out of this one quick.
01:00:06Come on.
01:00:07Open the panel, quick.
01:00:14Now, if you're going to take this Frenchman's place,
01:00:16you've got to know something about the lingo.
01:00:18Well, can't I just say I am French?
01:00:20They know that.
01:00:21You've got to tell them you don't understand English.
01:00:23Oh.
01:00:24Right, now here.
01:00:25Here's some useful French phrases.
01:00:27What time is it?
01:00:28Half past ten.
01:00:29Oh, they're shut up on reading.
01:00:31Oh.
01:00:32I've got a puncture.
01:00:33My handlebars are crossed.
01:00:35My grandmother is Mr. Cherubin.
01:00:37That's daft.
01:00:38Why?
01:00:39She's dead.
01:00:40D'oh.
01:00:41My postilion has been strapped by lightning.
01:00:46Oh, well, never mind.
01:00:47It doesn't show.
01:00:48Hey.
01:00:49Here you are.
01:00:50This is what you want.
01:00:51I do not understand.
01:00:53Speak more slowly, please.
01:00:55Try that in French.
01:00:59I do not understand.
01:01:02Speak more slowly, please.
01:01:04What are you talking about?
01:01:08The French is on the other side.
01:01:10Oh.
01:01:15Jeannie.
01:01:16Jeannie?
01:01:17What's she doing there?
01:01:20Journée.
01:01:22Journée comprends pas parler plus lentement.
01:01:26S'il vous plait.
01:01:28Oh, very good.
01:01:30Very good, but it don't make sense.
01:01:32It doesn't have to.
01:01:33It's French.
01:01:34Oh, but I'll never learn all that.
01:01:36All right, I'll find you something shorter.
01:01:38Please, I do not understand.
01:01:41S'il vous plait.
01:01:42Journée comprends pas.
01:01:45Try that in French.
01:01:46S'il vous plait.
01:01:48Journée...
01:01:49Comprends pas.
01:01:51Comprends pas.
01:01:53Go on, a little faster.
01:01:54S'il vous plait.
01:01:55Journée comprends pas.
01:01:57I don't know.
01:01:58There's something wrong somewhere.
01:02:00I know what it is.
01:02:01I know what it is.
01:02:02What?
01:02:03Your hands.
01:02:04Me what?
01:02:05Your hands.
01:02:06You've got to use your hands like Polly Neck does.
01:02:07Go on, try it with your hands.
01:02:08S'il vous plait.
01:02:09Never mind about the collection.
01:02:11Get on with it.
01:02:12Journée comprends pas.
01:02:14Oh, you look like a traffic cop.
01:02:16I know what it is.
01:02:17Get over doing it.
01:02:18Put your arms down by your side.
01:02:20That's it.
01:02:21Now just use your hands.
01:02:22S'il vous plait.
01:02:23Journée comprends pas.
01:02:25That's better.
01:02:26Try it much more for luck, eh?
01:02:27S'il vous plait.
01:02:28Journée comprends pas.
01:02:29Look, no hands.
01:02:30Go!
01:02:31You say nothing.
01:02:32Just act dumb.
01:02:34That ought not to be difficult.
01:02:35Come on!
01:02:37The first thing you've got to do is to learn how to ride.
01:02:40Now, here's the horse.
01:02:42That's its head.
01:02:43That's its tail.
01:02:44Where's the starting pose?
01:02:45Over there.
01:02:46And the finishing pose?
01:02:47Over there.
01:02:48I'll have to go backwards.
01:02:49Do.
01:02:50The next thing you do is to get weighed in.
01:02:51Weighed in?
01:02:52I'm riding it, not fighting it.
01:02:53And then you pat its quarter.
01:02:55Which quarter?
01:02:56There's only one quarter.
01:02:57Oh, don't be daft.
01:02:58There must be four quarters.
01:02:59Yeah, four quarters and nine quarters.
01:03:00That's five quarters.
01:03:01You shudder.
01:03:02Go on, pat its iron quarter.
01:03:05Steady, steady.
01:03:06You'll have the RSPCA after you.
01:03:08Now, look.
01:03:09The way you mount the horse is this.
01:03:11You put your left foot in my hand.
01:03:12Yes.
01:03:13Got it?
01:03:14Yes.
01:03:15I'll give you a bunk up.
01:03:16Yes.
01:03:17You put the right foot over.
01:03:18So, you ready?
01:03:19Yes.
01:03:20Here you go.
01:03:21Steady.
01:03:22Why didn't you hang on?
01:03:23Well, because there's nothing to hang on to.
01:03:24There's the reins.
01:03:25There aren't any.
01:03:26Do.
01:03:27Can't you use your imagination?
01:03:28No.
01:03:29You're the dumbest...
01:03:30Come on.
01:03:31Use my braces.
01:03:32Go on.
01:03:33Get on the horse.
01:03:34All right.
01:03:35Steady, lad.
01:03:36Steady.
01:03:37Don't mind about the horse.
01:03:38You know, it's really quite comfortable.
01:03:39It's just like the back of a sofa.
01:03:40Uh-huh.
01:03:41Go on.
01:03:42Hang on.
01:03:43Both hands.
01:03:44I can't.
01:03:45I've got my phrase book in this hand.
01:03:46Put it away.
01:03:47Where should I put it?
01:03:48Oh, don't tempt me, son.
01:03:49Go on.
01:03:50Both hands.
01:03:51All right.
01:03:52You ready?
01:03:53Yes.
01:03:54Yes.
01:03:55Right.
01:03:56Now, look.
01:03:57Yes.
01:03:58All right.
01:03:59Are you ready?
01:04:00Get up!
01:04:01Ah!
01:04:02Huff!
01:04:03I think Pollenack's waking up.
01:04:04Go on.
01:04:05Look.
01:04:06He's moving.
01:04:07Don't worry.
01:04:08I'll fix him.
01:04:09Give us one of those pills.
01:04:10What pills?
01:04:11The horse pills.
01:04:12Cuckoo.
01:04:13Hello, monsieur.
01:04:14Hello.
01:04:15Oh, it's easy.
01:04:16Monsieur.
01:04:17You swallow, huh?
01:04:18Like a little dicky bird?
01:04:19Uh-huh.
01:04:20Mm-hmm.
01:04:21Mm-hmm.
01:04:22Mm-hmm.
01:04:23Mm-hmm.
01:04:24Mm-hmm.
01:04:25Mm-hmm.
01:04:26Mm-hmm.
01:04:27Mm-hmm.
01:04:28Yeah?
01:04:29Water.
01:04:30Mm.
01:04:31Mm-hmm.
01:04:32Yeah.
01:04:33Good?
01:04:34C'est bon?
01:04:35Merci.
01:04:36Get him water.
01:04:37That must be his car.
01:04:38Come on, quick.
01:04:39No, no.
01:04:40Go on.
01:04:41Go on.
01:04:42All right.
01:04:43Get up there.
01:04:44Come on.
01:04:45I'll do it.
01:04:46I'll do it.
01:04:47I'll do it.
01:04:48I'll do it.
01:04:49I'll do it.
01:04:50I'll do it.
01:04:51I'll do it.
01:04:52I'll do it.
01:04:53I'll do it.
01:04:54I'll do it.
01:04:55I'll do it.
01:04:56I'll do it.
01:04:57I'm not doing it.
01:04:58I'm not.
01:04:59Oh, yes, you are.
01:05:00Are you right?
01:05:01Oh!
01:05:02Ah, chauffeur.
01:05:03This is Monsieur Bodinec.
01:05:04Yes.
01:05:05Racecourse.
01:05:06Look, all you gotta do is to get on the horse.
01:05:07And then fall off?
01:05:08That ought not to be difficult.
01:05:09Now, get in.
01:05:10Go on.
01:05:11Get in there, will ya?
01:05:12Ah.
01:05:13Chauffeur.
01:05:14Au revoir.
01:05:15Too sweet.
01:05:16Au revoir.
01:05:17Au revoir.
01:05:18Au revoir.
01:05:19Au revoir.
01:05:20Au revoir.
01:05:21Au revoir.
01:05:22Au revoir.
01:05:23Au revoir.
01:05:24Now, you change here.
01:05:26Attorney.
01:05:28No, no, no, no.
01:05:29You change here.
01:05:33Silver plate?
01:05:35Oui.
01:05:38Oui.
01:05:40Pass.
01:05:41Six to four to Phil.
01:05:42Six to four to Phil.
01:05:44Four to one Joe, sir.
01:05:45I bet six one or whatever.
01:05:47Lady, have a bet.
01:05:48What do you fancy?
01:05:49Oh, John, we must back that dear little Frenchman.
01:05:51He's so sweet.
01:05:52Well, what a way to pick a horse.
01:05:54Okay, ten quid on Cardinal to win.
01:05:56Ten pound to win, Cardinal.
01:05:57Take the number ninety-four.
01:05:59Sit down.
01:06:02A hundred and eighty.
01:06:03Right, I miss you, poly, poly, uh...
01:06:06Knack.
01:06:07Oh, knack.
01:06:08Yeah.
01:06:09Come on, man.
01:06:10Oh, straight through.
01:06:11Six to four.
01:06:12I have a chupa.
01:06:13Good morning.
01:06:14Here at Seldon Racecourse, there's the usual big crowd gathered to watch this small but select field...
01:06:19Here, Mr. Tom.
01:06:20Where's my Frederick?
01:06:21Hi.
01:06:22Oh, he's, uh...
01:06:23He's gone to the races, yeah.
01:06:24Oh, I wonder if I could go and join him.
01:06:26Well, you could try.
01:06:27He wouldn't half get a surprise if I sat down beside him, wouldn't he?
01:06:30So would the horse.
01:06:31Really?
01:06:32He said, of course.
01:06:33Do you mind?
01:06:34Now, there's Polignac.
01:06:35A very polished rider, leading jump jockey in France.
01:06:38And he's done very well on Cardinal this season.
01:06:43And there's Cardinal.
01:06:45Obviously the favourite.
01:06:46A magnificent French horse with a great reputation.
01:06:49And in my opinion, he should walk the race.
01:06:51In my opinion, he'd better.
01:06:53Now, they're starting to leave the paddock.
01:06:55That's Berserk and Hasty leading the rest of the field.
01:06:59And there goes Cardinal with Polignac up.
01:07:01He seems almost glued to the saddle.
01:07:03Oh, I wish he was.
01:07:05And now, I hand you over to Raymond Glendening for his commentary on the race.
01:07:10Now, they're all down here at the start and eager to go.
01:07:12Indeed, it looks to me as if Cardinal's in too much of a hurry.
01:07:15A triple, Brandy.
01:07:16Me too.
01:07:17One triple and one single.
01:07:19Here, don't he look like my friend?
01:07:20Well, he should, wouldn't he?
01:07:22What about the jack of the dandies?
01:07:25Well, well, well.
01:07:26He's backing right away from the rest of the runners now.
01:07:28He's wheeling round and he's unseated his jockey.
01:07:30Hang on.
01:07:31A most upsetting experience, not only for his rider, but for a large number of punters.
01:07:36I needed that.
01:07:37Another pint, miss, please.
01:07:38Now, Cardinal's fairly dragging his rider round.
01:07:40Get up, Fred, get up.
01:07:42Get up, get up.
01:07:43Why doesn't somebody help him?
01:07:44He can't seem to hold the horse or to find his feet at all.
01:07:47Well, that's better.
01:07:48He's up off the ground now, but he still seems a bit of a dither.
01:07:50Perhaps not to be wondered at, he came quite a cropper there.
01:07:53He must be very dazed.
01:07:54He's trying to mount the wrong side.
01:07:56The other side, you fool!
01:07:59I do beg your pardon, sir.
01:08:00I'm frightfully sorry.
01:08:03Got another clause.
01:08:04It's all right.
01:08:05He's up again now.
01:08:06He's up.
01:08:08He's up.
01:08:10He's up.
01:08:11He's up.
01:08:12Now, Cardinal's moving up in the line.
01:08:14The rest are all well behaved.
01:08:15Should be off any second now.
01:08:16We're nearly there.
01:08:17Once they start, we're away.
01:08:19The starter's up on his platform.
01:08:20And they're off.
01:08:22Off to a very fast start.
01:08:23They've had it through out of the gate.
01:08:26Blimey, no picture.
01:08:27Don't worry.
01:08:28That's all we want to know.
01:08:29It's in the bag.
01:08:30You mean we're safe?
01:08:31Yes, 10,000 feet.
01:08:3310,000 meters.
01:08:35Let's have a drink.
01:08:36Well, Polignac's got himself in plenty of trouble now.
01:08:38Think what he's doing.
01:08:39He's had plenty of experience at the gate.
01:08:47Oh, Mr. Tubb.
01:08:48Won't you sit down and have a cup of tea?
01:08:50Oh, Tar.
01:08:51And, uh, your friend.
01:08:53Oh, by the way, this is Mr. Harold Henry.
01:08:55How do you do, Mr. Henry?
01:08:56How do you do, Mr. Harold Henry?
01:08:57Won't you sit down?
01:08:58Oh, Tar.
01:09:00Sit down.
01:09:01Yes, Tar.
01:09:07You've got to eat yourself, can't you?
01:09:09Where's your other friend, Mr. Tubb?
01:09:11Oh, he's very busy.
01:09:13Oh, he's very busy.
01:09:15Not off me yet.
01:09:21Please.
01:09:26Tar.
01:09:27Sugar?
01:09:28Tar.
01:09:34Harold is very fond of sugar.
01:09:37He has a sweet tooth.
01:09:40I say, that's rather good, isn't it?
01:09:43Yes.
01:09:44Harold is full of tricks.
01:09:45His father was a conjurer.
01:09:51Excuse me, Harold.
01:10:02And they're now going a very good gallop.
01:10:04And his gay prince out there with Penny Fane and Carton
01:10:06is still well in the rear.
01:10:14Up again!
01:10:17Cake?
01:10:18Oh, thank you.
01:10:20After you, Harold.
01:10:21Tar.
01:10:43Tar.
01:10:57Now they're coming round to the last bend.
01:10:59And here comes Cardinal Dowd.
01:11:00Yes, he's starting to move up.
01:11:03Oh, a nifty piece of silver you've got there, Mrs. Wagstaff.
01:11:06My husband won it at school when he was a boy.
01:11:09Oh, really?
01:11:11Where was you at school, Colonel?
01:11:13Harrow.
01:11:14Oh, same here.
01:11:16We had a bounce in Harrow.
01:11:26Out of the way.
01:11:27Come on, steady.
01:11:28Keep going.
01:11:29Come on, keep going.
01:11:36And Cardinal's unclear.
01:11:37And now he's streaking away from them.
01:11:38They won't catch him now.
01:11:39Oh!
01:11:49And at the post, it's Cardinal first by a streak.
01:11:52We've won.
01:11:53We've won, we've won.
01:11:57What a magnificent race.
01:11:58I've never seen a burst of finishing speed like that before.
01:12:01And now he's gone.
01:12:02Hello, what's up there?
01:12:03Cardinal won't pull up.
01:12:04Puddinghead can't stop him.
01:12:05He can't stop him.
01:12:06He's running right off the course.
01:12:08Here, stop up.
01:12:09What?
01:12:10Oh, no, no.
01:12:11You've broken half the paper.
01:12:12Look out, look out.
01:12:13Will you leave that stretcher?
01:12:14I'll need one in a minute.
01:12:15I've been carried over enough.
01:12:16And if you don't stop...
01:12:20What?
01:12:21A runaway horse?
01:12:22Right, leave it to me.
01:12:26Fire here.
01:12:30Are you deaf?
01:12:31I've told you we've won.
01:12:32Please stop.
01:12:35Here, here.
01:12:36Oh, oh, water.
01:12:38Water.
01:12:48Look out, there's a herd of cows here.
01:12:50Oh, please, move over.
01:12:52Out of the way.
01:12:53Go on, steady.
01:12:54Move over.
01:12:55Who's looking for us?
01:12:56They wear balls, you know.
01:13:01Stop, it's a no-through road.
01:13:03Can't you read them, you damned horse?
01:13:09Here.
01:13:23There's nothing I like better than a nice cup of chow in the afternoon.
01:13:26Nice cup of chow.
01:13:27A bit strong, is it, my dear?
01:13:29I'll get some more hot water.
01:13:30Here you go.
01:13:31Get rid of it.
01:13:39Here.
01:14:04Look out!
01:14:05I'll break his neck!
01:14:06Ow!
01:14:07I've broken my neck, I think.
01:14:08Oh, no, I'm alive.
01:14:13Ten thousand pounds in the can.
01:14:16How much does an heirloom cost?
01:14:18That's no good, you can't see their faces.
01:14:27I've won!
01:14:30You've what?
01:14:32I've won!
01:14:34I don't believe it.
01:14:38You livering idiot!
01:14:40That's ten thousand pounds you've cost us.
01:14:42Why couldn't you stay at the back?
01:14:44Yes, and fall off before you got to the end.
01:14:46I didn't know if I'm finished, I'm through.
01:14:48Flash, we've got a scarper.
01:14:50Come on.
01:14:52Mate, open the panel.
01:14:54I'm not going in there again.
01:14:56You'll do as you're told.
01:14:57Hello.
01:14:58Watch your cock, where did you come from?
01:14:59Hello.
01:15:00Oh, un confrere.
01:15:01Bonjour.
01:15:02Ça va?
01:15:03Yeah, yeah, yeah, cut that out.
01:15:05What is it?
01:15:06What is it?
01:15:07Cops.
01:15:08Cops?
01:15:09If they're looking for a jockey, we'll give them one.
01:15:11Eh?
01:15:12Yeah, the real one.
01:15:14Eh?
01:15:22Come on, get your skates on.
01:15:27Wait, stop that!
01:15:30This way, men.
01:15:36Coucou.
01:15:37Ah, the jockey.
01:15:39You've come a long way, my man.
01:15:41Monsieur, madame.
01:15:45C'est très, très gentil à vous d'être venu me chercher.
01:15:50Madame.
01:15:58Après vous, madame.
01:15:59No kidding.
01:16:01Hey, let's get out of cover.
01:16:03Where are the neighbors?
01:16:06Hurry up and pack your bags and I'll meet you downstairs.
01:16:15What was that?
01:16:16Quick, the whole house is collapsing.
01:16:27Through the panel, quick.
01:16:30Come on, this way.
01:16:34Come on.
01:16:35Quick, the other way.
01:16:47Hey, au clair.
01:16:50Ha, ha, ha, ha.
01:16:53Quick, look. Jump off.
01:17:03Out to the men.
01:17:12They've spotted us.
01:17:14Up the ladder.
01:17:15Right.
01:17:16If you see how he's stacked,
01:17:18jump right.
01:17:22Go on, get up with him.
01:17:23I'm going up.
01:17:24Wait for me.
01:17:29Go on.
01:17:31Blimey, what's happened?
01:17:32Don't ask me.
01:17:33Help.
01:17:34What's happened?
01:17:35Help.
01:17:40Help.
01:17:41What?
01:17:42It's that clod of a jockey.
01:17:44I get it all.
01:17:45Come back here.
01:17:46Aye.
01:17:47I'm not waiting for an ace, that guy.
01:17:49I'm getting off now.
01:17:50Help.
01:17:51Look.
01:17:54Dig the ladder back.
01:17:56What?
01:17:57Take it down.
01:18:08Blimey, that was a near shave.
01:18:09Flash, look.
01:18:10Tell him to dial 999.
01:18:13Don't be so deceptive.
01:18:14Oh.
01:18:16Help.
01:18:17Fire.
01:18:18Police.
01:18:22Am I flashing out?
01:18:24I am, Eddie.
01:18:25Don't just stand there.
01:18:27Pull me up.
01:18:28Help.
01:18:30Help.
01:18:31What's the matter with you?
01:18:32I'm going to be sick.
01:18:34It's no good being sick.
01:18:36Flash, doesn't he understand?
01:18:38Get him down.
01:18:39Stop it.
01:18:40Stop it, monsieur.
01:18:42Stop it.
01:18:44Help him.
01:18:51Hey.
01:18:52Get back here.
01:18:53Help.
01:18:54Where's he going?
01:18:55He's going to hell.
01:18:57Get back in the driving seat.
01:18:59He must run along.
01:19:00He's driving him backwards.
01:19:02Hey.
01:19:04Monsieur.
01:19:05Save him there.
01:19:06Monsieur.
01:19:08I'll kill you.
01:19:09Hello.
01:19:12Look out for the car.
01:19:13I think that was our fault somehow.
01:19:25Hey.
01:19:26Get away now.
01:19:28Oh, no.
01:19:30Come on, get away.
01:19:31Run.
01:19:34I could not do with a fair escape now.
01:19:38Stop knocking that boat, Flash.
01:19:40You'll have me all.
01:19:42They're gaining on us.
01:19:43What?
01:19:44Run faster.
01:19:45They're gaining on us.
01:19:46But I can't run much faster.
01:19:51Where's he gone to now?
01:19:54She's right on top of us.
01:19:58No, she's not.
01:19:59She's underneath us.
01:20:02I can't see her.
01:20:04Flash, tell him to take it up.
01:20:06Up.
01:20:07Up.
01:20:11Up.
01:20:17Jack.
01:20:33Yeah, turn it up.
01:20:35Right.
01:20:36Stop.
01:20:37Do you hear me?
01:20:38Stop.
01:20:39Ah.
01:20:42Oh.
01:20:43I've done my job.
01:20:44I've done my job.
01:20:45Oh, madam.
01:20:46Dear madam.
01:20:47You see me.
01:20:48Sorry, madam.
01:20:49Hey.
01:20:50Is this heaven?
01:20:51It's really not my fault.
01:20:52Look at him.
01:20:53He's a fool in the tree.
01:20:54Hey, guys.
01:20:55Wait.
01:20:56I'm coming.
01:20:57Oh.
01:20:58Hey.
01:20:59Stop.
01:21:00The ladder is going to fall.
01:21:01I'm going to fall.
01:21:02I'm going to fall.
01:21:03I'm going to fall.
01:21:04I'm going to fall.
01:21:06Oh, for the milliard.
01:21:09Stop.
01:21:10Hey.
01:21:11Come back.
01:21:12Oh.
01:21:13You can't get away.
01:21:17Look.
01:21:18Come here.
01:21:20Come here.
01:21:23Ah.
01:21:24Ah.
01:21:25Ah.
01:21:26Ah.
01:21:27Ah.
01:21:28Ah.
01:21:29Ah.
01:21:30Ah.
01:21:31Ah.
01:21:32Ah.
01:21:33Ah.
01:21:34Oh!
01:21:35Ah!
01:21:36Oh!
01:21:37Get me out of here!
01:21:38Hey, let's go, man, let's go.
01:21:39Let go of the police, we're getting us out.
01:21:40Let go, Ed!
01:21:41Let go, Ed!
01:21:42Ah!
01:21:43Ah!
01:21:44Ah!
01:21:45Ah!
01:21:46Ah!
01:21:47Ah!
01:21:48Ah!
01:21:49Ah!
01:21:50Ah!
01:21:51Ah!
01:21:52Ah!
01:21:53Ah!
01:21:54Ah!
01:21:55Ah!
01:21:56Ah!
01:21:57I'll get you ten years for this!
01:21:58Ah!
01:21:59I'll get you ten years for this!
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